Author Topic: i need a little confidence booster.  (Read 12338 times)

Offline Ghost1988

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Re: i need a little confidence booster.
« Reply #15 on: January 06, 2009, 10:39:24 PM »
i appreciate the feedback guys. i cant explain how well this site helps. if i never found this site and got a chance to vent to people who are in the same boat i think ide be feeling 10 times more helpless. thanks

Offline warhawk

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Re: i need a little confidence booster.
« Reply #16 on: January 06, 2009, 10:39:46 PM »
hey ghost:  as some of the sly brothers have said... it's not about your looks.  it's about the big C: confidence.  once U get that confidence... everything will follow.  U will no longer have negative feelings about yourself.  self-confidence & a slick noggin' is an unstoppable combination.  i hope & pray that U will find it.  O0 O0

WARHAWK O0
Tough times don't last but tough people do!!!


BALDANDRE

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Re: i need a little confidence booster.
« Reply #17 on: January 06, 2009, 10:44:32 PM »
Ok...first off,  plugs!?!

Bro...talk about feeling like a loser...what if it goes bad...which most do..then what, a scarred "kinda" hairy head you wont want to even shave cuz of the scars!

You're a hip lookin' and nice lookin' bro...

and really.....you do not want a girl that digs you because of your hair...

it's attitude bro...

at our gym the coolest most confident dude (and lots of girls are around him) is shaved smooth with a very dark horseshoe shadow...the bro oozes stud tough...

girls want confidence and some one they feel can take care of them ( I know womens movement and all)..but they look at confidence, faces and whitt!

Remember though, in club scenes and in life...most bro's just  fake the confidence and hope someone notices them..

if you don't got it...fake it!

Big one though...to the right, cool girl (and that is what you want)...a shaved slick head..

ONLY says confidence!

Offline HardKor

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Re: i need a little confidence booster.
« Reply #18 on: January 06, 2009, 10:59:41 PM »
Well, I don't know what you looked like with hair and I'm not a 20 year old girl, but a 24 year old one... I think you look attractive just how you are now. 
*~Kori Loves Cam~*


BALDANDRE

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Re: i need a little confidence booster.
« Reply #19 on: January 06, 2009, 11:06:18 PM »
Well, I don't know what you looked like with hair and I'm not a 20 year old girl, but a 24 year old one... I think you look attractive just how you are now. 

Now there ya go! O0

Offline Ghost1988

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Re: i need a little confidence booster.
« Reply #20 on: January 07, 2009, 12:16:37 AM »
haha ok. i appreciate it. and  like i said.......some days are better than others. thats just how it is. but im gonna make that my new years resolution. to have more confidence and not be so worried about what people think of me or my hair.

marty22

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Re: i need a little confidence booster.
« Reply #21 on: January 07, 2009, 06:06:27 AM »
Cam: you're a lucky guy!

Offline Cam

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Re: i need a little confidence booster.
« Reply #22 on: January 07, 2009, 06:24:11 AM »
Cam: you're a lucky guy!

 O0 Yes I am! Thanks!



Offline Mikekoz13

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Re: i need a little confidence booster.
« Reply #23 on: January 07, 2009, 08:25:12 AM »
GHOST-

You ask why a girl would go out with you when there are millions of guys with nice hair.
My friend, you've sort of answered your own question with that statement. That is the EXACT reason why a girl would go out with you....because you are different.... because you look great while looking different.... because the confidence it takes to be a little different from the crowd shines thru.

I've seen the photos of some of our members girlfriends/wives on this Forum and there are a lot of fine ladies clinging to these guys.

Like Andrew, I believe that your own insecurity over your hair loss is getting in the way of everything else. Women like confident men. If you are not confident they will smell that stink on you and go somewhere else to get what they want.

Stand tall and proud..... project your confidence...people will be drawn to you.
Good energy, karma, whatever you want to call it...... it's one of the great assets in life.

Confident people are successful people.....whether it be in their jobs, their relationships, or in the other things they enjoy in life.

Quit living in the past, be confident, and most importantly be proud of who and what you are.
"What contemptible scoundrel stole the cork from my lunch?" W.C. Fields

Offline SlyBro1988

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Re: i need a little confidence booster.
« Reply #24 on: January 07, 2009, 08:27:22 AM »
Hey, I'm new to the sly fraternity, I'm also 20 and sly due to MPB like you. I can relate to what you are talking about... Walking around the uni campus there are not many sly brethren around and there are girls who reject us for it, however such girls are not worth your time anyway. I honestly think you pull off the sly image very well, i'd advise just to go out and have some fun make the most of being 20 and eventually you will come terms with who you are = confidence   :)  

Offline Mikekoz13

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Re: i need a little confidence booster.
« Reply #25 on: January 07, 2009, 08:30:31 AM »
Hey, I'm new to the sly fraternity, I'm also 20 and sly due to MPB like you. I can relate to what you are talking about... Walking around the uni campus there are not many sly brethren around and there are girls who reject us for it, however such girls are not worth your time anyway. I honestly think you pull off the sly image very well, i'd advise just to go out and have some fun make the most of being 20 and eventually you will come terms with who you are = confidence   :)  

Welcome to the Forum SLYBRO1988! Post an intro in the INTRODUCTION section so that you can get a proper SBG Welcome. Tell us a little about yourself in that intro.
"What contemptible scoundrel stole the cork from my lunch?" W.C. Fields

Offline DuffRyder17

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Re: i need a little confidence booster.
« Reply #26 on: January 07, 2009, 08:59:48 AM »
lots of people get depressed about hairloss... it may seem dumb to other people who aren't going through it. but here at this forum, many of us understand what it feels like, and many have overcome this obstacle( depression is the obstacle not hairloss).

I can only speak for myself, but hair transplants are not a solution that would really help. me. because it would appear that I am at the beginning and I will most likely lose more hair than they can transplant.... you situation is different, but you don't know how far you are going to recede. what one surgery will do today won't help the hair you might lose in the future.

I too have insecurities about my shadow.. getting a close shave and getting tan are ways to reduce visibility  of shadow...

 this past sunday  as I was driving to a girl's house to pick her up.  I wondered why this girl even wanted to hang out with me. as the night went on it became apparent to me that this girl, while she does care what I look like, does not give a damn about  my hair or lack of it. she cares much more about my personality, ability to have conversation, and most importantly the way I make her feel when we are together... hair doesn't make a difference to her...
Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery. Today is a gift, That's why it's called the present!

Offline PowerOfCheese

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Re: i need a little confidence booster.
« Reply #27 on: January 07, 2009, 09:04:23 AM »
I imagine it would be tough attracting a girlfriend if you end up looking away any time they look at you. I'm also not one for self deprecating humor. I never feel the need to poke fun at myself for a shaved head, especially around women. If anything, if there are comments I smile, rub my head while saying something like "Thanks! It's freakin awesome! I love it" and continue whatever was going on. When I see people pick on themselves like that, other people appear to smile along out of courtesy and it's usually followed by a little bit of awkwardness. Good luck explaining to me how this would actually help you. That strategy won't help you mentally and won't project the image of confidence to whoever you're around.

I understand that this is dealing with women and not 20 year old "girls". I have yet to meet a "woman" that made any kind of deal about the hair on my head or lack of. I've had it long, bad, shaved, buzzed... they still want to experience the power of cheese.

Ghost... Brother... You need to pick yourself up, GRAB YOURSELF BY THE STONES and realize that you're a good looking guy. Your looks are attractive but your aura and confidence is not. Once you realize and accept that fact, all your self-esteem problems will be behind you.

? Could you be consumed about the hair loss and how it LOOKED and not how it looks now?  That process seems to have been rough for you. Now what are you going to do? Sit around and feel sorry for yourself over something 50% of the male population will deal with at some time or another OR be a man, accept it and use it to your advantage. Women and people in general find belief in oneself is extremely sexy. Whereas doubt indicates weakness, confidence shows strength. It's human nature; pre-programmed into our DNA.

Try this: Think about what you’re good at. Ask yourself: what are the things people like about me? Begin focusing on these qualities every day. Thinking about your attributes will help create a positive image of yourself in your own mind.

Visualize yourself as the man you want to be. Every day, project to yourself the image of the confident guy you wish to be. Close your eyes and see yourself getting whatever you want. Imagine yourself in different situations; See yourself striking-up conversations with hot women who are all over you. Picture yourself standing tall, feeling bold, powerful and confident. Focus on how easy it is to have these women pursuing YOU.

This kind of daily exercise might seem silly at first but believe it man. You can convince yourself anything you want. Your brain, not your shaved dome is what's holding you back.

Take control. If you WANT to be a confident person, you will be. 

Listen and understand what Duff said above.:
Quote
she cares much more about my personality, ability to have conversation, and most importantly the way I make her feel when we are together... hair doesn't make a difference to her...
« Last Edit: January 07, 2009, 09:12:46 AM by PowerOfCheese »
---- The greater the artist, the greater the doubt. Perfect confidence is given to the less talented as a consolation prize. - Robert Hughes

Offline Wil87

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Re: i need a little confidence booster.
« Reply #28 on: January 07, 2009, 09:12:24 AM »
I imagine it would be tough attracting a girlfriend if you end up looking away any time they look at you. I'm also not one for self deprecating humor. I never feel the need to poke fun at myself for a shaved head, especially around women. If anything, if there are comments I smile, rub my head while saying something like "Thanks! It's freakin awesome! I love it" and continue whatever was going on. When I see people pick on themselves like that people appear to smile along out of courtesy and it's usually followed by a little bit of awkwardness. 

I understand that this is dealing with women and not 20 year old "girls". I have yet to meet a "woman" that made any kind of deal about the hair on my head or lack of. I've had it long, bad, shaved, buzzed... they still want to experience the power of cheese.

Ghost... Brother... You need to pick yourself up, GRAB YOURSELF BY THE STONES and realize that you're a good looking guy. Your looks are attractive but your aura and confidence is not. Once you realize and accept that fact, all your self-esteem problems will be behind you.

? Could you be consumed about the hair loss and how it LOOKED and not how it looks now?  That process seems to have been rough for you. Now what are you going to do? Seems pretty cut and dry to me. Sit around and feel sorry for yourself over something 50% of the male population will deal with at some time or another OR be a man, accept it and use it to your advantage. Women and people in general find belief in oneself is extremely sexy. Whereas doubt indicates weakness, confidence shows strength. It's human nature; pre-programmed into our DNA.

Try this: Think about what you’re good at. Ask yourself: what are the things people like about me? Begin focusing on these qualities every day. Thinking about your attributes will help create a positive image of yourself in your own mind.

Visualize yourself as the man you want to be. Every day, project to yourself the image of the confident guy you wish to be. Close your eyes and see yourself getting whatever you want. Imagine yourself in different situations; See yourself striking-up conversations with hot women who are all over you. Picture yourself standing tall, feeling bold, powerful and confident. Focus on how easy it is to have these women pursuing YOU.

This kind of daily exercise might seem silly at first but believe it man. You can convince yourself anything you want. Your brain, not your shaved dome is what's holding you back.

Take control. If you WANT to be a confident person, you will be. 

 



 

The Cheese speaks the truth!! Complete genius PoC - I think I will try to apply this to my outlook as well!!

Ghost - gotta be honest your post in the "to be or not to be....bald" was one of the reason for me a. joinin this site and b. shaving my head! Your a young guy, a good looking dude and you tottally pull off the bald look!

I can't add anything to what the cheese said, but I have up and down days, it sucks, but both you and I seem to be guilty of letting our hairloss define who we are... thats total BS dude, we are so much more than a receeding hairline! I happen to also be a pretty cool I think and I am sure you are too, hell I would hang out with you!!

Once you accept that things are not going to get any better and accept that you are one cool ass sly mofo you can start building the confidence you once had!!

marty22

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Re: i need a little confidence booster.
« Reply #29 on: January 07, 2009, 09:27:07 AM »
Methinks Cheese & Duff are the voices of reason here; maybe they can take over for Dr Phil? (after he retires)