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#45
by
PBurke
on 21 Jun, 2008 17:54
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ok here goes some brutal honesty:
DUDE SHE IS TREATING YOU LIKE HER DOORMAT. SHE KNOWS THAT YOU WILL BE THERE WAITING AND SHE THINKS IT IS A GAME. ONLY PROBLEM IS, YOU ARE GONNA BE THE ONE TO LOSE AT HER GAME. SERIOUSLY LITTLE BRO. YOU ARE YOUNG, GET THE HELL OVER THIS CHICK. SHE REALLY AIN'T WORTH THE STRESS. AFTER SHE SEES THAT YOU MOVED ON AND ARE HAPPY, MAYBE SHE WILL COME BACK. MAYBE NOT. BUT WHO THE HELL CARES ? YOU WILL HAVE MOVED ON AND WILL BE HAPPY. DON'T WAIT AROUND FOR TEN YEARS LIKE I DID. GO BE HAPPY NOW BRO. YOU DESERVE IT. THE LONGER YOU LET HER GET AWAY WITH TRAMPLING ON YOUR HEART, THE HARDER SHE WILL STOMP. PLEASE BRO, GO BE HAPPY WITH SOMEONE ELSE.
wow, i just made myself feel better. cool, i hope you listen tucker.
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#46
by
Tucker-54
on 21 Jun, 2008 18:00
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I'm listening.... All your guy's input is sooo important.
It's just soo hard tho. When your feelings get attached to someone its hard to break the bond... especially when she makes me feel like #1... I mean she "says" she appreciates my friendship and blah blah blah mooshymooshy and i really WANT to believe her cuz of how I feel and I think thats whats F---ing me up right now is that my mind wants me to be done, but my heart doens't

I do appreciate all the input, its really helping. this thing is just tooooo complicated for simple ol me.
ALSO: she says that its just a phaze since summer has just started. Not a phaze for her, but for me. During school we hung outall the time but since theres no school she's hanging out with all the people she couldn't.
She says she doesn't want a relationship and she wants to be free, which in my thinking means she wants to be able to hook up with any guy she wants, and thats really uncool to me.
Theres definitely pros and cons of being with her, even being her friend...
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#47
by
PBurke
on 21 Jun, 2008 18:07
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dude, i totally understand. my wife of ten years left a couple weeks ago for an ex boyfriend from before we met. i know how hard it is to let go. it will get better. i hope.
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#48
by
stemikger
on 21 Jun, 2008 18:22
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Hey Bro,
I didn't read all the replies, but as hard as it is to hear you gotta move on.
When you meet someone that you fall head over heals over it can't be one sided. When you meet the right one, you will both feel the same way.
Trust me dude, you gotta suffer some heart breaks before you get the girl of your dreams. I have been exactley where you are now, and trust me, no matter what you say, do or don't do, she will not be yours. She sees you more like a friend then anything else, and you don't want someone who doesn't want you back. It's not worth the effort.
Good Luck Bro and when the right one comes along, she will be as crazy about you as you are about her and everything will flow just right.
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#49
by
stemikger
on 21 Jun, 2008 18:24
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originally posted by pburke
dude, i totally understand. my wife of ten years left a couple weeks ago for an ex boyfriend from before we met. i know how hard it is to let go. it will get better. i hope.
Oh Man, I didn't see this. Sorry Bro.
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#50
by
Razor X
on 21 Jun, 2008 18:30
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I can't really add much to what's already been said except to say that you deserve better than a "friend" like this. Always remember that and don't ever be a doormat for anyone.
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#51
by
babb4214
on 21 Jun, 2008 18:31
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hey bro,
Listen, i've been there A LOT of times, where she's all you think about, you dont care about hanging out with other chicks OR even your best buddies. Even if you do hang out with your buddies, you're thinking about her..... i've been there.
Let me share something with you. I'm sure it's been said here before. Yes, you need to get over her, that's nothing new, and that's the hardest thing about this whole deal. but the ONLY way to do that, is GET RID of every contact you have with her. Delete her number from your cell phone, if you talk to her online, BLOCK her. DONT call her and DONT text her. It'll be hard for the first few days, but i guaruntee you, you'll get over her. If you COMPLETELY dissapear to her, she will definately be wondering where you are at and what you are doing if you cut off all contact with her all of a sudden. You need to find other things you enjoy WITHOUT HER, if you aren't happy by yourself, you cant be happy with someone else.
If she told you that you were smother, that is NOT a good thing at all man.. i dont mean to be a jerk or anything about it, but i have been there and i have learned from it, the hard way... SO... now that you know you're smothering her, cut off all contact with her, and do YOUR OWN thing, for at least the time being...
I would even go as far as turning her down if she asks to hang out with you the first time. dont be mean about it, just say you have plans and you'll hang out another time.... IF YOU MAKE YOURSELF TOO EASY FOR THEM TO GET, THE GAME IS OVER! it really is a big game man, you just have to be a little strategic about it and you'll be fine.
you ever wonder why girls like bad guys and good guys finish last? it's because the "bad" guys have figured out the game, and dont let the girls control the "game"
i'm by no means an expert on this subject, but i do know a few things on it and i've put them into practice and seen the results i was looking for. i hope i helped man, if you have any questions just let me know and i can elaborate more.
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#52
by
BALDANDRE
on 21 Jun, 2008 18:32
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dude, i totally understand. my wife of ten years left a couple weeks ago for an ex boyfriend from before we met. i know how hard it is to let go. it will get better. i hope.
Bro...really?!? I'm Sorry dude!!!
I hate sh!t like that!
Sucks!!!!
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#53
by
Tucker-54
on 21 Jun, 2008 18:46
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PBurke, I'm really sorry to hear about your wife.... that really sucks. stay strong man.
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#54
by
Pshrynk
on 21 Jun, 2008 18:51
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dude, i totally understand. my wife of ten years left a couple weeks ago for an ex boyfriend from before we met. i know how hard it is to let go. it will get better. i hope.
Wow that sux donkey private parts.

Try to take it day by day for that cute little fella in your avatar pic.
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#55
by
Tucker-54
on 21 Jun, 2008 18:52
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hey bro,
Listen, i've been there A LOT of times, where she's all you think about, you dont care about hanging out with other chicks OR even your best buddies. Even if you do hang out with your buddies, you're thinking about her..... i've been there.
Babb, you hit the nail on the head with that one. But In my opinion I think what you said is a little extreme. Like she really is a good friend to me and I think disregarding her altogether would be bad... I think I just need a little space to get over the relationship deal and re evaluate things. I can see us being friends for now and if she wises up oneday, maybe she'll come back. I agree with alot of you: I think my timing was just off.
I love how everyone has an opinion and we all agree on most stuff just some people are at the extremes (im not saying you are babb, just in general)
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#56
by
PBurke
on 21 Jun, 2008 18:57
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dude, i totally understand. my wife of ten years left a couple weeks ago for an ex boyfriend from before we met. i know how hard it is to let go. it will get better. i hope.
Wow that sux donkey private parts. 
Try to take it day by day for that cute little fella in your avatar pic.
thanks guys. yes phsrynk, he and his brother are really keeping me sane right now. gotta do it for them.
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#57
by
babb4214
on 21 Jun, 2008 19:57
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i can see how my opinion may be a little extreme....i'm not saying you shouldnt' want anything to do with her, i would just put everything on the back burner...because she KNOWS that even though you want to hang out as "just friends", you STILL want more, and that could be still smothering... all i would say is dont hold her at a higher priority or anything else when it comes to spending time with her...if she doesn't put in the effort to even a friendship, then why should you? it's a two way street....so if YOU are always calling and always texting....then dont and soon enough, she'll wonder why... she wants your attention, and now that you're giving it to her anytime she wants, it's like no big deal, but take that away and sometimes dont give it to her when she wants, she'll want it even more... i'm telling you it works.
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#58
by
wpruitt
on 21 Jun, 2008 19:58
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thanks guys. yes phsrynk, he and his brother are really keeping me sane right now. gotta do it for them.
And they are all that matter right now. They too are in my thoughts and prayers.
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#59
by
Nick912
on 21 Jun, 2008 21:24
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Ok I was debating if I should post this, because alot of people dont agree with this but here I go....
Men and women cannot be friends
It is true. If a guy is being all nice, and sweet, and caring to a girl he ultimatly wants to get in her pants. I dont buy that guys like to hang out with girls to be "friends". There is a flicker in that guy's head that he wants to do her. When a woman tells me that she has guy friends, she just has a bunch of guys that want to give her the root. Some of you may disagree, but I speak from experience, and from most of the men I know.
So Tuck man put this girl on the road. You dont need to be her friend. She is viewing you as a weak man trust me. Get you a nice summer romance goin. Hey once you join the service, you will be overwhelmed with chicks!!! So dont worry about it my bald friend!