BaldAndre, you do look much better bald than with hair.You looked ok with hair but the hair actually made you look older.The bald look makes you look younger and more macho.May I ask how old you are? I'm 51 and people tell me I look younger with the buzz cut than I did with the hairpiece.
Like an demonic clock, my emotions have run out of gas. I am bipolar. That's how it goes for me. Every now and again, I feel the weight of the world crushing me. I have a lot of problems in life that I can't really figure out, so I usually end up feeling bad about the things I understand all too well. I would like to thank the (mostly) encouraging people here for positive support. I write a lot of things on this site because it lingers in my head. My goal in this is to have someone prove me wrong. (Or at least make a point.) I do have enough to be unhappy about, but it usually bottlenecks into / is set off by MPB. Just when I think I'm on top of the mountain, or at least out of the rain, the other shoe drops and a trap-door opens beneath me. I do not claim to have life worse than anybody else. Worse is an opinion. However, everybody understands "bad". "Bad" is what you feel when there isn't enough good. Regardless of what a problem is, if there isn't enough good to balance it out, the resulting emotion is "bad". I wake up every day without enjoying it. I am alive for the ridiculous and unfounded hope of a better tomorrow. The daily burden of a life without joy is rather taxing; it leads to my mind revisiting dark hallways and haunted rooms. I guess what I'm trying to say is this.... Until I find something good in my life, something worth waking up for, I will (every now and again) post some angry, unresolved issues on this site. I will never enjoy being bald, for it has been a dread that I've always known would come to fruition, even as a little kid. As such is true, I will always ponder the unasked questions in my mind. I will always think beyond the answers I get in life. I will always question the accepted wisdom. I'm never content to be miserable and not question why. One thought that nobody really touched is something I will form into a question; Does it not make sense that I miss my hair? (Paraplegics walk in their dreams, I have hair in mine.) (To dissolve any ignorant responses, I'm not comparing the two, I'm talking about one's true identity existing in dreams.)
I have another question to anybody who would like to answer.... What makes getting up in the morning worth it for you? I get up feeling sleepy and cranky, dreading the day to come. What about y'all? I know it's not a bald question, but I'd still like to know what kind of mental fuel people run on.
Kojack- I sure would love to dwell on positives. I've yet to find any that don't involve saying things like, "At least I'm not on fire." The word "not" makes that a literally (not figuratively) negative statement. A negative cannot count as a positive, so I'm lacking.BaldAndre- Yep. The hair isn't the issue. That's just what it comes out as. Although sometimes it is an issue, just not nearly the predominant one.JDigory- Suicidal thoughts have been a gigantic part of my life. I have a scar on my wrist, I've been on meds that made me worse, I've been on drugs that numbed the pain, I've had enough conversations on life to write a book, I spent 3 awful days in a looney bin, and I'm always on guard looking for the next horrible thing about to haunt my life. So, nothing you say could ever make me feel worse. Brain diarrhea is better than brain constipation. I always value what people have to say.I have another question to anybody who would like to answer.... What makes getting up in the morning worth it for you? I get up feeling sleepy and cranky, dreading the day to come. What about y'all? I know it's not a bald question, but I'd still like to know what kind of mental fuel people run on.
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Topic: I still can't feel good about it. (Read 20497 times)
