In despair

[rockandstroll]

Hi guys, I noticed my hair thinning on top and slight recision at the temples last october, I use to have amazing long thick, dark, curly hair, and got alot of compliments for it. I remember saying to my sister few years ago I might get it cut short, both she and my cousin said but we like you with long hair. This memory makes feel really depressed.

This has been really bothering me as i'm only 24, and my dad and grandad did'nt start balding until late 30's to 40's.

I shaved it down to a no 2 a few month ago I still got interest from some girls and have since grown it out, which kinda made me feel abit better, but then again my balding is'nt really noticable, I considered taking propecia, until I read about it side effects and how it has ruined peoples lifes. Hair transplant look dreadful, my only hope is that hair cloning come out soon, but that seem to be a pipedream or atleast very far of.

This has been driving me mad, and it feels like its ruining my life,  its on my mind 24/7 I wear a hat to work all the time, it has caused me so much anxiety that I can't think straight, I make stupid mistakes at work, and that says something as the job I have is only an easy temp job until I find the job I want.

Reading this forum has kind of made feel abit better, but then again all the guys on here seem to be in their 30's to 40's and married with kids, i'm only 24 and single, I just can't seem to imagine myself getting a girlfriend being bald, most girls in their 20's are shallow and have to a boyfriend that makes them look good in front of their friends.

I know this will probably sound ridiculous to you guys but i've even had suicidal thoughts over this, because it holding me back in other areas of my life finding the job I want, the thought of having to endure peoples comments and sticking out like a sore thumb.

I've tried to look for solutions by going on a forum called hairlosstalk which is very depressing, full of guys saying how their lifes have been ruined and that they can't get girls no more. I even read of one guy on here who said girls look at him in disgust when he tries dance or flirt with them in clubs, and that he a manic depressive because of it.

Sorry for my depressing rant, but I would like to here if there are any other guys in their 20's who are bald but have been successful in finding a girlfriend or getting dates.

[Jim80]

Hey,

welcome to SBG. I'm 27 and my wife loves my baldhead I'm also Bald by choice but every woman in my family and at my work havel said I looked better bald and I'm sure all of our bald brothers out there either by nature or by choice will agree with me on this. But the only one you need to please about your looks is yourself, having a bald head will give you your confidence back. women will flock to you for the ever famous random head rub  . any woman who is so self centered that she wouldnt give you the time of day bacause of appearance isnt worth it. SBG is like a Fraternity and we're all here for eachother. Keep us posted

Jim

[Marz]

rockandstroll,

I have been there. I began loosing my hair at about 22 - 23. I was in a band that was doing well and at the time going bald was not just the things you mentioned above but also I felt I would never be a successful musician since image has so much to do with it.

I am married to a beautiful woman that literally laughs at the pictures of me with hair. I have had a great musical career that was only limited my my own wants and needs in my life.  I played a gig last night and had plenty of women complement my playing and corner me into conversation (and they obviously were not that interested in my playing).

I can tell you this.

its not at all as bad as you build it up in your head. You are taking a simple part of life and reacting like you just got told you have a month to live. It is totally natural to be depressed when dealing with this, many men go through it. You are seeing the boy go away and there is a MAN developing. 

Your perception of what is important to women is pretty skewed. Look at Seal and Heidi Klum, seriously, he is bald and has scars on his face and landed the most beautiful woman on the planet.

everyone who loves you now will love you without hair.

A bald man can make a woman look good and as it has been said here many times, women seem to preferr a bald man to a balding man.

There is a point that you will have to deal with yourself first and not consider what others think. Is it your life and you can live it under the dark cloud that you yourself have made or you can free yourself from all of this and come to terms with who you are and embrace that.

Be thankful you are alive, healthy and have a life to live. Everyone has problems and you should thank god yours is on the outside.

and finally, shave it off and give it 30 days.

[babb4214]

Rockandstroll,
Hey man, you have absolutely NOTHING to worry about! I'm only 22 and i have a HUGE widows peak on my dome, and i shave it off to a #0, no guard on the clippers. But let me tell you, i'm in the EXACT same boat as you!

I used to have really thick hair that i could do anything with! but you know what? i'm pretty glad that it's not there anymore because i dont have to worry what it looks like or spend time in the morning trying to get it "just right" for the day, and then checking in the mirror to see if it's all messed up.. i'm done with all of that now, so it's a load off my back.

As for the girl situation, the MOST IMPORTANT thing that you have to remember is that CONFIDENCE IS KEY!! girls DO NOT want a guy that's not confident in himself! i cant tell you how many articles i have read that say that around 80% of women dont put looks first, they put personality first. that's quite a big number. So if you are confident around women, and just have a good and easy going and funny personality, you're in like flynn! i mean, i'm really not the best looking guy around, but i was confident around this girl that i wanted, and she's GORGEOUS! she's been asked to be one of those girls on "deal or no deal" with the breifcases, she's had modeling jobs and stuff. and i KNOW for a fact that she can get pretty much any dude she wanted, but somehow i got her, and it was because i was confident around her and let my personality take over 

So dude, no worries about losing your hair, you are NOT alone! if you want proof of guys being attractive while being bald at the same time, google pictures of " Jason Statham" or "kelly slater".....two bald dudes, both by nature, and slay women if they wanted to.

its all about attitude dude, it really is, you just have to get it right and you'll be good to go!

[babb4214]

sorry i forgot to add this in my last post, but another thing you can do to feel good about yourself and have confidence is GET IN THE GYM!! get in shape, not only for the girls, but for yourself.... let me tell you, when you work out and you start to have a body that you like, your confidence goes up, and believe me, the ladies will notice.... so get in there pal, focus on getting in shape, getting buff and ripped, and youre good! it'll take time if you're not already active or in shape, but good things take time! girls also like a nice bod, if you got one of those, you can look like sloth from the goonies and still pick up chick, well maybe not sloth, but you get the point! just stay clean, get fit, HAVE CONFIDENCE, and you'll love life.

[nomad]

sorry i forgot to add this in my last post, but another thing you can do to feel good about yourself and have confidence is GET IN THE GYM!! get in shape, not only for the girls, but for yourself.... let me tell you, when you work out and you start to have a body that you like, your confidence goes up, and believe me, the ladies will notice.... so get in there pal, focus on getting in shape, getting buff and ripped, and youre good! it'll take time if you're not already active or in shape, but good things take time! girls also like a nice bod, if you got one of those, you can look like sloth from the goonies and still pick up chick, well maybe not sloth, but you get the point! just stay clean, get fit, HAVE CONFIDENCE, and you'll love life.

Hell I'm a fat boy and I still have no problem with the lay-dees, its all about the confidence  

[Mr.Gleam]

Rock,

I went through a lot of soul searching before I finally shaved my head bald. Believe me I know where you are coming from. Even though the thinning part didn't hit me until I was 43 I was spoiled with having all my hair for so long that it was very tough to realize what happened.

I went through all the thoughts: I look better with my long wavy hair, people won't like me with no hair, I'll look like a freak, my friends/family won't be used to me like this, why me, why does that 70 year old guy still have all his hair, and lots more.

I kept holding up that mirror to my thinning patch and I couldn't believe it. I tried the straight back combover which looked so-so but wasn't fooling anyone went I bent over. I didn't even like any of my photos with the thinning hair. I tried propecia for 3 months and even though I didn't get any sexual side effects I didn't want to be paying the money or taking drugs all my life.

Then I just decided what the hell - just do it. I blazed it off last friday morning and my head didn't look as bad as I feared! I wore a baseball cap backwards to the gym and at work for the first 2 days because of the whiter areas but after I went out in the sun my head got a little more color and I ditched the cap.

My co-workers have gotten used to it and I got a few compliments. Best of all - I liked the shaved look 100% better than the thinning look and I feel better about myself this way. My long wavy hair had its time, along with the good times as a kid and in high school and so on, and now the bald looks gets its chance.

I never in my dreams thought I would be liking this or even used to it and I'm only in my 1st week.

Hope this helps.

[BALDANDRE]

Brother I am not young...

but I was when I started to shave my full head of hair 13 years ago...

Just look up the posts of the young dudes around here all in their early 20's, some MPB and some BBC...

All these dudes love being bald and have totally gotten great response from the opposite sex..just from shaving their head smooth!

Look up the young SLY dudes...

ChicoD
***Sticks***
Jason Fieber
Tucker
Dimiakira
Jmcmana

and I know there are a lot of others...

Go shave your head bro..and let your new confidence get you dates!

[Sgt. Pate]

I'm not a young guy either but I am BBC! (Bald By Choice)

One of the best decisions I ever made was to shave my head.  My hair was a constant issue for me.  It was so thin that the only way I could keep it combed was to blow dry it and then spray it.  It was to me a form of bondage to my appearance which showed how concerned I was with what others thought.

The big secret is, most people are so concerned with what others think of them that they really don't care or think that much about you!

It's a transition for sure, it will take a little time for everyone to adjust but I'd say go sly bro... free yourself! 

You'll be so much more confident because you have taken control of your appearance and will no longer be in that victim mentality.

You'll also look really good too! 

[jusbnme]

First off, welcome brother.  Second, don't ever have suicidal thoughts again man.  Nothing in the world is worth taking your own life especially loss of hair.  Don't let it get you down at all man.  It's all good bro.  There are plenty of guys on here that are as young as 20.  Some even younger.  I know what you mean about younger girls being shallow but that is just a very small handful of them.  There are a lot of nice girls out there too who just want a man who is a nice person and has a good personality.  Like many of the guys on here will tell you, meeting a girl mainly has to do with confidence.  Not looks.  Most women like guys who are confident about themselves.  Not because they have a full head of hair.  Most of the women I've talked to since I started shaving love the way I look and think it's actually sexier than when I had hair.  So get that thought out of your mind brother.  Go ahead and shave it and I promise you that you will have more confidence than ever before.  Because obviously the thinning is bothering you right now.  So why not shave it and give it a try.  I was in the same boat and that's why I shaved.  My hair was thinning so I said, "What the heck."  Shaved it and loved it.  I figured it's going anyway so why not try the shaved look.  There are a lot of real good people here and plenty of support.  So stick around and keep us posted on your progress buddy.  One more thing...Stay away from those "other" sites.  Most of them don't offer anything positive like this community does.  Being bald is something to embrace and love because it's who you are.  Not something to be depressed about or think the world is ending.  And that's all "those" sites will offer you.  Stick around here for some good support and make sure to check in with us.  Good Luck.   

[gsxr60097]

Hi guys, I noticed my hair thinning on top and slight recision at the temples last october, I use to have amazing long thick, dark, curly hair, and got alot of compliments for it. I remember saying to my sister few years ago I might get it cut short, both she and my cousin said but we like you with long hair. This memory makes feel really depressed.

This has been really bothering me as i'm only 24, and my dad and grandad did'nt start balding until late 30's to 40's.

I shaved it down to a no 2 a few month ago I still got interest from some girls and have since grown it out, which kinda made me feel abit better, but then again my balding is'nt really noticable, I considered taking propecia, until I read about it side effects and how it has ruined peoples lifes. Hair transplant look dreadful, my only hope is that hair cloning come out soon, but that seem to be a pipedream or atleast very far of.

This has been driving me mad, and it feels like its ruining my life,  its on my mind 24/7 I wear a hat to work all the time, it has caused me so much anxiety that I can't think straight, I make stupid mistakes at work, and that says something as the job I have is only an easy temp job until I find the job I want.

Reading this forum has kind of made feel abit better, but then again all the guys on here seem to be in their 30's to 40's and married with kids, i'm only 24 and single, I just can't seem to imagine myself getting a girlfriend being bald, most girls in their 20's are shallow and have to a boyfriend that makes them look good in front of their friends.

I know this will probably sound ridiculous to you guys but i've even had suicidal thoughts over this, because it holding me back in other areas of my life finding the job I want, the thought of having to endure peoples comments and sticking out like a sore thumb.

I've tried to look for solutions by going on a forum called hairlosstalk which is very depressing, full of guys saying how their lifes have been ruined and that they can't get girls no more. I even read of one guy on here who said girls look at him in disgust when he tries dance or flirt with them in clubs, and that he a manic depressive because of it.

Sorry for my depressing rant, but I would like to here if there are any other guys in their 20's who are bald but have been successful in finding a girlfriend or getting dates.

The highlited quote I believe is from one of my posts on the other forum.  I just wanted to correct it.  I now know I wrote that whilst in a deep depression so it was skewed.  I am manic depressive period.  Not because of hairloss.  True that many women are not attracted to me but I don't really think it was because of my hair.  I am slender 190lbs at 6'6" and alot of women don't find that too attractive.  That could have easily been the dirty looks I got that evening.  I am in great shape but am lanky and being this tall you would need twice the muscle as a guy say 6' to look the same.  I mean I can bench 250lbs free weights and almost 300 on a machine.  i think thats impressive.  I am just tall.  I bwelieve the other members witnessed my depression on the "on a scale of 1-10" thread.  Its just tough going from a guy with hair that attracted alot of women but not all.  To a balding man that attracts way less.  Believe me it is not because of lack of confidence, humor, intelligence etc.  Actually just scored a few days ago .
Sorry for being a downer but I too don't know what to do about our situation.  I have been losing since 18...

[ugabulldog]

i'm only 24 and single, I just can't seem to imagine myself getting a girlfriend being bald, most girls in their 20's are shallow and have to a boyfriend that makes them look good in front of their friends.

Those aren't the girls you need anyway...

[SlySurfer]

Brother I am not young...

but I was when I started to shave my full head of hair 13 years ago...

Just look up the posts of the young dudes around here all in their early 20's, some MPB and some BBC...

All these dudes love being bald and have totally gotten great response from the opposite sex..just from shaving their head smooth!

Look up the young SLY dudes...

ChicoD
***Sticks***
Jason Fieber
Tucker
Dimiakira
Jmcmana

and I know there are a lot of others...

Go shave your head bro..and let your new confidence get you dates!

Hey what about me!   
 
A word to the young brutha,
Life is too short to stress on your hair. Shave it off and you'll have the confidence to conquer all your past fears. Do it now and you won't have any regrets whatsoever.

Cheer, Anthony 

[BALDANDRE]

[
Hey what about me!   
 
A word to the young brutha,
Life is too short to stress on your hair. Shave it off and you'll have the confidence to conquer all your past fears. Do it now and you won't have any regrets whatsoever.

Cheer, Anthony 

Bro...he asked for the YOUNG bald dudes old man!

Just kiddin'....dude you're one of the great spokesmen for the cause...

of course you're on the list!

[Tyler]

i'm only 24 and single, I just can't seem to imagine myself getting a girlfriend being bald, most girls in their 20's are shallow and have to a boyfriend that makes them look good in front of their friends.

Those aren't the girls you need anyway...

Hey bro, check out the website http://www.stylelife.com and the following post on the SBG blog about Neil Strauss.  This guy didn't start getting chicks until he shaved his head, and now he's hailed as one of the best pick up artists in the world.

http://www.slybaldguys.com/serendipity/archives/75-The-Game-Penetrating-the-Secret-Society-of-Pick-Up-Artists-by-Neil-Strauss.html

If it's really bugging you that bad, I say just shave it!  I know it probably sounds really weird to think that shaving your head will provide you relief, but almost every guy that comes here in their 20's, 30's, 40's and older that is dealing with MPB says "I wish I would have done it sooner!" when they shave their head.  It seriously provides a liberating feeling.  I know because I started balding at 23 and started shaving my head at 25.  It's been 5 years and I would never go back!  Like Marz, my wife also laughs at my pictures of me with hair.