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Parents and select friends reactions. by outsider82 on 17 Sep, 2007 09:28
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Hey Guys,
Thought i would drop you a line and tell you that i'm home now. I haven't shaved my head just yet. Before i left to go overseas (three weeks ago), I had to go to a family BBQ. My parents were there, and they saw me with the sly head (it wasn't fresh, i'd let it go for three days). They didn't say anything about my hair that day. All my other relatives said that i looked exactly like a younger replica of my father, to which they were kinda surprised. Later that week, i had to go over to get my passport from my parents place.
These were my parents words about my slyness. Mum: "I think your hair is too short, It should be longer, but..... if thats what you want...." Dad: "I think that your hair is too short too".
This spun me out because dad is naturally bald, and he shaves his to a #0 himself.
These comments and a few others by people make me second guess my choice to go sly. Even though one of the experiences i wanted to gain out of this was to not care about what other people think. I find myself going back to worrying about it.
After going to europe and seeing all the sly guys over there, made me want to be sly even more.
I just feel a little confused. Any thoughts?
Out -
#1 by X The Hierophant on 17 Sep, 2007 09:34
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These comments and a few others by people make me second guess my choice to go sly. Even though one of the experiences i wanted to gain out of this was to not care about what other people think. I find myself going back to worrying about it.
After going to europe and seeing all the sly guys over there, made me want to be sly even more.
I just feel a little confused. Any thoughts?
Out
That is natural to take negative comments to heart. My mother-in-law visited us this weekend and she harped on me the entire time she was there on how much better I look with hair. It made me want to go and shave it even smoother! You can never make everyone happy, and no matter what you do not eveyone will approve. I feel it is best to just do what YOU like and f*&^ everyone else. Just my opinion... This is what I do, and it works for me.
Personally I think you sport the sly look exceptionally well
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#2 by Sooner Steve on 17 Sep, 2007 09:35
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Do what makes you happy. It's your head.
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#3 by Paul on 17 Sep, 2007 09:36
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Be yourself Out. Like being sly?....be sly...stay sly. I too got negative reactions from family and especially parents but you have to be true to yourself. In time they will all come around. Besides, you know you can always turn here for support.
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#4 by outsider82 on 17 Sep, 2007 09:39
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Be yourself Out. Like being sly?....be sly...stay sly. I too got negative reactions from family and especially parents but you have to be true to yourself. In time they will all come around. Besides, you know you can always turn here for support.
Thanks Paul.
That's why i posted the topic, needed some healthy constructive comments from you guys.
It's 1:30 am here and i'm wide awake, damn jetlag. -
#5 by xnewyawka on 17 Sep, 2007 10:34
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Do what makes you happy. It's your head.
This about sums it up, and I also echo what Paul and X say too. Good advice.
Out, if you're wide awake, then why not get to shavin' the dome, brudda!
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#6 by outsider82 on 17 Sep, 2007 10:40
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Do what makes you happy. It's your head.
This about sums it up, and I also echo what Paul and X say too. Good advice.
Out, if you're wide awake, then why not get to shavin' the dome, brudda!
funny you should suggest that, i've just buzzed it to a 0, ready for the mornings shave.
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#7 by nilagorilla on 21 Sep, 2007 21:50
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Hell I was bald when I came into the world it's not like anybody hasnt ever seen it b4 it's just been maybe 28 or 29 years and they forgot juuuuust how magnifico it was LOL
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#8 by Tyler on 22 Sep, 2007 12:36
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As, I'm sitting here on the beach, hungover, listening to the waves, I've had a thought on whey relatives and parents sometimes make comments like this. You guys can let me know if you think I have something here or if it's the foggy brain that's got the best of me.
I think parents and relatives that give comments like "I liked you better with hair" or "I think you should keep it longer" are remembering the days when we were kids with hair and they were young. Now that they are getting older, us shaving our heads because of hair loss, or whatever reason, reminds them that we are adults now and that they are aging. So, the comments are really to help them feel better, not us.
Just a theory. What do you guys think? -
#9 by Paul on 22 Sep, 2007 16:23
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Think there is an awful lot of truth in those statements, Ty. It is always hard for parents to think of there kids as grown up, regardless of the child's age. I also think it a fact that the older you are the less likely you are to deal with change well.
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#10 by jcroce1994 on 22 Sep, 2007 18:20
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Tyler makes a good point. Looking older makes our parents feel older. Too bad!
My mom is not a fan of my slyness at all. But I think it's more that she's resistant to change. And that may be your parents issue as well. They just want you to stay the same, sweet little boy they've always known. They don't want to change that mental image of you that they carry around in their heads. So when they see us, their memory and their eyes are getting conflicting signals.
Make yourself happy. I think you look great sly. Mom and dad will get over it, once they get used to it.
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#11 by Alexander215 on 22 Sep, 2007 19:01
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I think parents just need something to pick at.
First I got, "when are you gonna cut your hair?"
and now, "are you gonna grow it out?"
Maybe they just like teasing us. -
#12 by KALBO on 22 Sep, 2007 19:20
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I scaled down and buzzed my hair so much since '98, no one really noticed...and when they did, it was for the better!!!
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#13 by marshd1000 on 22 Sep, 2007 20:17
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There might be some truth to the theory of parents not liking the sly look because it makes them feel old. But I also believe that for some it's a control issue. For others, it's a thing where they think that hair is what all should desire and they find it weird that some like being bald. I have had plenty of pressure in the past about my shaving my head. My now deceased dad would say, "Marshall, it looks like hell". My stepmother initially cried when I did it. I had a female friend try to guilt me to grow it back saying that in the Bible I am to honor my parents. Since my stepmom doesn't like the look that I was to honor her by growing my hair back, if I was to be a good Christian. Usually, I have been a people pleaser. But for me it has been a great thing to shave my head in terms of being my own person for once. Also it looks better than my thinning, receding hairline.
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#14 by jusbnme on 22 Sep, 2007 20:42
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Do your own thing man. Like many have said, if you like it then keep it. Don't let other's comments make your decision.