Things you will never hear out of a Sly Bald Guy's mouth...

[warhawk]

hey honey.... where's the blowdryer?

WARHAWK

[JDog]

I've been out hiking in the woods all day now I have all these burrs in my hair, Honey can you come pull them out for me.

[warhawk]

AHHH  MAN..... it's monday.... the barbershop is closed.

WARHAWK

[JDog]

My hair is rather curly and unruly today. I think I'll take the metrosexual route and straighten it with my wifes hair straightening iron

[Tyler]

Dude, I have lice!

[shyslyguy]

"I think comb-overs rock!"

or

"y'know ... i think I might be losing my hair!"

or

"I can't go out with my hair looking like this!"

[jusbnme]

Those damn split ends. 

[Paul]

Hey, they're running a sale at Super Cuts

[Timmay]

Can I get this corn rowed?

OR here is the best one.....

TYLER would you please massage my head so it will relax me so I can go to sleep! LOL

[X The Hierophant]

TYLER would you please massage my head so it will relax me so I can go to sleep!

Maybe I read that wrong, but I think Tyler just got sexually harrassed 

[PigPen]

This damn humidity always makes my hair frizzy

[Timmay]

These kids are about to make me pull my hair out

[herronm]

Time to clean the bathtub drain.

[Sooner Steve]

Barber:  "Do you part your hair on the right or the left?"

[Timmay]

I hate it when I wear my hat because it leaves a band around my hair.