Teetering on that fence!

[toastedbusters]

I've been a bit of a lurker but I finally bit the bullet and felt I'd jump in for some experienced advice from folks you actually have been through it!

I'm 24 and first noticed my crown thinning a few years ago in college. For the past two years, it's been spreading and I've been using all the tonics I can afford with my meager money to try and curb it. When I was still at home, my parents would lament that I wasn't "proud" of my appearance but didn't try to stop me. I played it off to my friends like it was no big deal, but their comments stung. And although I've dated many different girls since my hair started thinning, I was never as lucky as my friends at the bars and the women I dated, while not shallow, always left me feeling like I was somehow inadequate.

Well, I'm sick of it. I'm a teacher now and my kids can't believe I'm only 6 years older than some of them. Parents are convinced I'm married with a family of my own. And while the girls still don't comment, it's getting more and more obvious whenever I go out that it's an issue. The thinning crown has now become a ring of baldness on my vertex that I've tried to ignore or take as a sign of pride and joke about, but I'm sick of having this giant beacon on the back of my mind calling in my insecurities to everybody I know.

I want to shave it, but I'm afraid of how people would react. Some of my students regularly joke about how I should start wearing a tiny hat to cover the spot, and while it's all in good fun and I'm right there with them laughing, I don't want that to be what they remember about me. I also have a sort of "Gumby" head, meaning it's not nice and round on either side. My head has never been shaved or buzzed because of it. Do I step into the inevitable and just do it? 30 days? People would totally know why I shaved, but I'm good at rolling with the punches. I just don't want to look stupid.

If enough people respond, I'll post pics but for now a little encouragement or advice is what I'm looking for. Anything from the experts? 

[rosepedal]

id say post a pic

so we could see how far ur balding but

try being a nw 4 at 17

anyways if u still have good coverage i would adivse not to shave  maybe buzz it down if u want

id say man up, u still have hair just a bad bald spot

own it
                  just my 2 cents            now if gets worse in the future the u can think more about it

 but just get comfortable with whatever u do, and accept ur hairloss as a part of life

                         now when it gets worse in the future then shave it or buzz it down

[D.A.L.U.I.]

Picture would be a good thing.  But you've acknowledged that you've got the genetics for balding.  Remember two things, first and foremost it's not a disease or disability.  Second, it is only a disfigurement if you let it become such.  You will be bald, how bald and to what degree is set in your genetic code--that you can't control.  What you can control is how you're going to go bald--either slowly, hair by hair, until you've got little left, for many guys, but a fringe or, and this is recommended, you step out in front, get control and shave it down.  You'll continue to "lose" hair, but the process will be hidden in plain sight.  Will people comment, probably.  Will you ultimately feel better about it, yes if the membership here is on point and I think we are. 
Look around the site, there is a lot of information here about how to shave your noggin and a wealth of personal stories of what people have experienced as they took the plunge.  You know a lot of this from your "lurking" days.  Now that you've joined up, my guess would be that you really want to try it, to experience the freedom, to put the whole world of "balding" behind you.  Do it, you'll never regret it.  And if you get any adverse comments, think back to the last babe that said you had sexy hair.  I believe that the chances are that as a sly guy you'll get some action just because you're sly. 
Welcome, the shave awaits!

[sailor61]

Just do it and get it over with - better to be bald than balding.  It's simple - I joined the "club" going on 4 months ago.  Since then I have not had to think about if it's combref correctly, looks like a mess in the wind/rain and I haven't had a single case of hat hair.  I did let it grow for close to 2 weeks recently ....... and the entire time my only thought about it was  "have I let this grow long to prove to myself I prefer being sly?"

Most likely your parents will respond with a bit of concern, your co workers and friends will have a day or 2 of fun at your expense and the students will think it's a cool move.  Within a few days it will be a complete non-issue.

And - to be blunt - headshape is the lamest excuse.  We all go through that foolishness and in just about every single  case we llok somewhere between fine and  great slick bald.

If you are really concerned about the school issue, you;ve got the perfect opportunity coming up shortly.  Summer vacation starts  soon and take that time to give yourself a real vacation - from the anxiety hairloss is causing you.


We all want to see before and after pictures..

[Ming the Merciless]

Well, I'd post pix real fast, since apparently--if I'm reading the news correctly--the whole shebang ends today.  End o' the world, etc.

Now if that should not come to pass--and somehow I suspect sunrise tomorrow will see me my usual (depraved, megalomanical) self...

If you've read extensively here, you will realize: MPB is not the "end of the world."  It's what a lot of us men "do."  Unhappiness with your hair is like unhappiness with the weather.  You can be miserable, or you can say, "That's the way it is," and move on.  I suggest "move on."  If it rains, you take an umbrella; if your hair thins and it bothers you, shave it smooth.  Two solutions.  If you are man enough to carry an umbrella (although I note that only the Air Force allows them to officers) in the rain, be man enough to grab that razor (I note that shaved heads are allowed in all military branches).

[TheSlyBear]

I can guarantee that you will not "look stupid". It seems like everyone worries about their head-shape, but it turns out to be a complete non-issue.

You've got nothing to lose -- in the unlikely event that you don't like it after the 30-day-callenge, it grows back much faster than you think it will.

[Arty Chris]

This bald thing is pretty new to me, and yes people knew exactly why I shaved it off... pretty much the same reason as you're thinking of!

But I have yet to have a single negative comment on it! It feels good and I'm so pleased I did it!

As far as looking stupid... have a look at the large amount of photos of guys on here... do any of them look stupid? I don't think so... Or... do they all look real cool???  Fancy joining the real cool group?

What is stupid though is me! I sunburnt my head for the first time today! It bloody hurts! Don't do that... wear sunblock!

I guess ultimately you have to do what you feel comfortable with, and far be it from me to push you into anything... but it WILL look good!

[AvengedSevenfold]

Being a university student here in the UK, I left school 5 years ago and have done college and now 4 years of university since then, so I can actually be very understanding of you and the way your class views you.

First things first- and you will know this as much as I do- students will look to exploit any area of underconfidence of their teacher, cos they have yet to develop a mature mindset and because they're all so young, the likelihood is that they have a thick head of hair so they can't see things from the other side, yet.

If you are worried about the way your hair has thinned on the vertex, and it is effecting your confidence and hence is picked up on by your students, what could be a better statement than to buzz your hair off, stick out your chest at the front of class and say yeah, this is who I am. What's the worst they can do? 'Omg you have shaved your hair?'- "AND?!".

Clearly you are a good guy- intelligent, understanding, and teaching people- those are some pretty outstanding qualities right there.

You have already said you have joked a little bit with the students about your hair- now you can shave it and do the same thing, except this time your hair/image will totally be YOUR choice- YOU are in control, YOU can certainly look more fashionable that way and also there won't be any bald spots for anyone to focus on any more.

I personally bet my bottom dollar you'd look awesome- nice suit, neat shaved head- very slick! You have the intelligence, you have become a qualified teacher, and you CAN make a fashion statement and be a young trendy teacher.

Go out there and do it, you've got all the qualities people (and women!) will love.

You could have Bradley Cooper's hair and students will still look for a way to mock you, that's the way they are, so relax and go and show people what a good guy you are.

[intex]

As others here have said get off the fence and do it.  Yes a few comments initially and then none.  It is you.

[kenny57028]

I'm 19 now started balding when I was 17. So I wasn't in high school that long ago and yes believe me kids look for ANYTHING they can pick on teachers for. It's just what they do if it wasn't your hair it'd be something else. Summers almost here so shave your head when school gets out and you'll have the whole summer to get used to it and be able to rock it when you get back to school. Believe me there probably are, or going to be, a few kids that come through your years if your a high school teacher  that are going to be thinning, and they'll definetly look at you as a role model of what to do with their hair. So show them its no big deal and theres more important things to worry on than hair. Well best of luck to you man!  

[AvengedSevenfold]

Kenny, loving the new pic dude! You're looking great! You rock it really well man, hope I can this summer!

[philp]

Do it! You will most likely regret not having done it sooner. I started losing my hair at 19 and for me the worst part was once I could no longer hide it, yet I still tried. This involved lots of time in front of mirror, lots of anxiety, being self-conscious all the time. I cannot describe how truly liberating it was to ditch the hair. It may be awkward or uncomfortable for the first day or so, but wow, after that, you'll wonder why you didn't do it sooner.

[SlyCanuck]

Every last one of us was in your position at one time or another.  The only regret that I have is waiting so long.  Do it, try it, you'll like it!

[toastedbusters]

Took a while to post this stuff, but I've been playing with my webcam lately and remembered you guys. These were taken today. Got a haircut last week and went in (and left) feeling confident. I was getting a buzz until the last minute, when I thought "I want to see what it's like one last time with hair." Here we are, a week later, and I figured I'd take a look. Once again: 24, teacher, single.

Here's some pics. Thoughts?

[Razor X]

My only thought is what are you waiting for?