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Women NEVER walk up to a guy with hair and ask if they can touch his head... by Undercover on 12 Jan, 2010 21:20
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Let's face it guys, not ALL women dig bald heads, but the ones that do? Hoo boy, LOOK OUT. They're shameless and will sneak up behind you and start fondling your melon before they even say hello.
I'm willing to bet that this has happened to every single one of you at one point or another in your head shaving lives.
Girls do NOT do this to guys that have hair. I freakin' LOVE that.
Its happened to me on more than one occasion & in a couple of instances the girl was actually SOBER. And really, really hot.
Usually you don't expect to turn around and see some lizard-like 40-something cougar with a smoke hanging from her lips, a cocktail in one hand and your head in the other (I will NEVER get that image out of my head) saying "Oh my gawad yer gowaguss!" But worry not, go out in public enough and it WILL happen. (Shudder)
Then there was the time I was working as a bouncer at a pub when a Bachelorette party showed up.
Gentlemen, start your engines. If you are the ONLY bald man within visual range of a gaggle of drunk women at a Bachelorette party, prepare yourself. It's gonna get UGLY.
Firstly, it seems that women all play the same game(s) at these things, which includes the 'big girl' version of truth or dare, or some kind of sexual scavenger hunt. And they always, ALWAYS have a dare/hunt scenario involving a bald guy.
On this particular evening the 'dares' included: French kissing the nearest bald man for no less than 30 seconds, (this happened 6 times) planting a kiss on the head of a bald man & making sure it stays there for the rest of the night, (several women apparently drew this card.) dragging the nearest bald man to the dance floor and seeing how quickly you can give him an erection (Again they all drew the damn card), and finally, the most tame of them was to have their picture taken in the arms of a bald man.
It wasn't until later that evening that I found out that only ONE of these women had drawn the aforementioned cards, the rest just thought I was hot. I had to go home covered in lipstick and perfume with a raging case of blue balls, but somehow it seemed worth it...
Now how many guys with HAIR can tell a story like that?
NEXT! -
#1 by aarrggh on 12 Jan, 2010 22:01
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I like 40 something cougars ...........
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#2 by Tyler on 12 Jan, 2010 22:49
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Great post! This is so true!
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#3 by Mikekoz13 on 13 Jan, 2010 05:15
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It's true. I draw women's attention everywhere I go..... and I'm not even good looking!!
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#4 by PeripheralxMvmnt on 13 Jan, 2010 07:34
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Aaaaaaamen!
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#5 by PigPen on 13 Jan, 2010 08:34
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Awesome post, thanks. I needed it this morning
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#6 by mangosink12572 on 13 Jan, 2010 11:38
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It has happined to me in a bar - -I love it when they feel my dome and ask to rub it - -just the other night two gals saw me come in and sit at the bar - -I was the only bald guy and they asked me if they could rub my dome - - - - -it was fun - - - - -
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#7 by mangosink12572 on 13 Jan, 2010 11:53
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Undercover - - -Like the use of the word- - MELON for our bald dome - - - -I love my melon as I am sure you do - -
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#8 by Undercover on 13 Jan, 2010 16:40
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I like 40 something cougars ...........
Oh don't misunderstand me my friend, so do I.
They... KNOW things.
What I was referring to are the 40-50 year old cougars that have spent juuuust a wee bit too much time in the tanning bed so that they kind of resemble an iguana that's been hiding behind your refrigerator for 3 weeks without food or water...
But hey, iguanas need love, too. -
#9 by Undercover on 13 Jan, 2010 16:44
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It's true. I draw women's attention everywhere I go..... and I'm not even good looking!!
I disagree, you're bald so you're automatically good looking by default.
Mother nature only created so many perfect heads, the rest she covered in HAIR.
Woo... There's my new tag line! -
#10 by marty22 on 13 Jan, 2010 17:17
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welcome and thanks for the story!
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#11 by marshd1000 on 13 Jan, 2010 18:46
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This reminds me of my high school reunion when I had one gal give me a quick head rub and a former University of Washington cheerleader give me a kiss!!! Woo Hoo!
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#12 by D.A.L.U.I. on 14 Jan, 2010 07:15
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Ladies in Canada are very proper, down in Louisiana, it's hands on then comment--rarely a request before the act--and who would say no anyway
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#13 by Undercover on 15 Jan, 2010 14:12
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Ladies in Canada are very proper, down in Louisiana, it's hands on then comment--rarely a request before the act--and who would say no anyway
Yeah its that whole humble, polite Canadian thing. Hell, our soldiers even ask the other side if its ok if they shoot them...
And people wonder why nobody's ever attacked Canada... Well, there WAS that one time in 1812, but we don't need to talk about that