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Prolonged Eye Contact with a Woman: Does it Mean Anything? by benlen on 17 Jan, 2013 20:53
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Hello Sly Brothers, I have a question for you about women and eye contact!
So I just moved to Boston, going to grad school, and I see plenty of attractive women about! One day this week, I went to the art supply store to stock up on essentials, and there was this attractive strawberry blonde behind the desk who I noticed had these particularly vibrant eyes, and I wasn't laying on the moves or anything, just being friendly, and she was very friendly in return, and her eye contact was unusual. Most women don't hold that kind of gaze with strangers, I thought.
Flash forward to a few days later, who'd have thought in a city it could be a small world? I spot her coming out of her apartment on Huntington and again, the prolonged eye contact.
Personally guys, whenever a woman does this to me, and it is rare, I'm always stunned, because most women are taught safety wise that it's not good to look/establish eye contact with strangers on the street, because that can give sleezy guys all kinds of incentive to make a move.
Thing is, I'm pretty sure I saw her leave her building with a dude (I wasn't really looking though, to be honest, haha, as I was sort of held by her gaze) and I'm just not sure what to think of it!
Like, is this something where this woman is thinking, man this guy is weird? Is it just that she's a type who has certain shape of eyes that just lend themselves to being involving? Or does she potentially see me as at least somewhat attractive?
I don't know! She's attractive, but I'm not super interested in pursuing anyone right now, as i only got out a relationship in November.
The reason why this has me befuddled is, as a guy, I'm the one who is used to making the prolonged eye contact and making the moves. So I can't tell whether this woman is just comfortable or is actually oddly interested? What do you folks think? You won't offend me if you say its probably just her way, I'm looking for advice/experience on the mater! -
#1 by marty22 on 17 Jan, 2013 21:23
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Visit her again in the store and discreetly ask her out.
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#2 by Hingatao on 17 Jan, 2013 21:42
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I agree with Marty, even if it's just for a cup of coffee. Seems like the best way to find out if she's interested.
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#3 by Gary~ on 17 Jan, 2013 22:41
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As you say -- that sort of behaviour is not usual for women. Sounds like you're in there with a chance. The problem is though that you will never know for sure unless you do as marty22 suggests.
On the other hand if you really don't want to be in a relationship at the moment then just forget it. Sounds like you're interested though.
Disclosure: I live on my own with a little dog, womanless. -
#4 by VoodooSyxx on 18 Jan, 2013 00:19
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Aye, it typically means they're either interested, or think you might be a weirdo. In most cases the potential weirdo look is a LOT different so I'm going to lean toward option 1. I'd ask her out if it were me. There's nothing that says you can't have a drink and some conversation, even if an actual relationship isn't the current target.
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#5 by stasiu on 18 Jan, 2013 14:06
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Visit her again in the store and discreetly ask her out.
That is probably best thing to do. So she's smitten by your bald head and good looks ... making new friends never hurts ... -
#6 by slyjoe on 18 Jan, 2013 18:41
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I wouldnt get your hopes up too much. But like I always say "If you think its right for you, go for it!"
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#7 by JT16 on 19 Jan, 2013 11:55
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It could be she's making an effort to improve her eye contact.
Could be a sign of interest.
Personally, I'd shoot first and ask questions later. -
#8 by Switchy on 19 Jan, 2013 13:43
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You also have to look at her facial expression and see the full body movement. A trained eye tells you many things .
Also your reaction tells her many things about you.
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#9 by slyjoe on 19 Jan, 2013 13:46
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I agree with Switchy, same goes for high school too. Is all the same.
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#10 by benlen on 20 Jan, 2013 12:16
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Thanks for the advice fellas!
No, I'm not looking for a relationship or to date this particular woman, haha, just to clarify. I was more interested in deciphering those rare instances where women, whether they are attracted to men or not, seem to have eye contact unlike that of most women. It always startles me when it happens, so I wanted to see what folks other experiences were with this. -
#11 by Tyler on 20 Jan, 2013 21:52
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I'm one that likes to smile at people when I make eye contact. It's a habit I started about 10 years ago when I learned that it's almost impossible for someone not to smile back at you when they see you smiling at them. I recommend everyone try it.
This will do a few things for you. It will help you get in the habit of looking people in the eyes. It will make you seem more outgoing. And it will often help you meet some really interesting people in life.
Most importantly, I think it helps give the other person a little slice of happiness in their day. You never know how a simple smile could change someone's day for the better. -
#12 by Gary~ on 20 Jan, 2013 22:52
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I'm one that likes to smile at people when I make eye contact. It's a habit I started about 10 years ago when I learned that it's almost impossible for someone not to smile back at you when they see you smiling at them. I recommend everyone try it.
This will do a few things for you. It will help you get in the habit of looking people in the eyes. It will make you seem more outgoing. And it will often help you meet some really interesting people in life.
Most importantly, I think it helps give the other person a little slice of happiness in their day. You never know how a simple smile could change someone's day for the better.
That [^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^] is a good, cheap and simple thing to do. When I go to town tomorrow I'm going to consciously give it a try and see what happens. -
#13 by Frontier Guy on 21 Jan, 2013 18:53
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I think your "weirdo sensor" would be going off if that was her thinking.
I'd chalk it up to either she's interested (doesn't matter whether you are or not) or that she's just a happy and friendly person who is probably fun and uplifting to be around. -
#14 by tomgallagher on 22 Jan, 2013 09:24
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I agree with JT16..Shoot first and ask questions later.