Welcome Elijah, come on in--we've got a seat for you

[I've always wanted to say that!]
First of all, let me say you have one fine beard, great color and it's going to go great with your new haircut. Fortunately, as evidenced by your beard, when we get the genes for mpb we also are often also blessed with genes for a great beard.
My suggestion would be to get some clippers--you probably have them for trimming the beard. Set it to no guard, and take everything above the ears as far down as possible. Then hot shower with shampoo, leave some conditioner on the stubble. Then lather up with a gel or better some Headslick on a brush. Now take a razor--this you may have to buy considering that beard

, I'd start with a Fusion or a Schick Hydro 5 solely because they're very forgiving and not prone to inflict a nick. With a new blade SLOWLY shave your head. Then rinse with warm then cold water, wipe down with some witch hazel, hydrogen peroxide or other astringent and apply a non-oily after shave balm like Nivea Extreme Comfort. Then sunscreen, always sunscreen.
Thirty days later all your friends and everyone who you meet from here on out will only know you sly, and with that beard, you're going to look good. Get in front now, put the worry and angst of mpb behind you--and start living again!