Go Down
-
#15 by Razor X on 01 Oct, 2011 17:09
-
Nobody here is hurting.
-
#16 by Chavster on 01 Oct, 2011 17:16
-
Yes, but there's an awful lot of suffering going on in the world, and a huge amount of it is a far worse and much deeper type of suffering than hair loss, and with much of that suffering, someone somewhere is making plenty of money out of it.
Perhaps everyone is in so much pain that they can not address this issue for to do
so would require that members admit that the issue is painful.
Well I cant speak for anyone else, but I'm not in any pain. I have a full head of hair, if and when I choose to let it grow. This doesnt mean I dont sympathise with those who ARE in pain, but as I've said until I'm blue in the face, I can sympathise but I cant comprehend, because I'm not suffering from their pain. However, one thing I do know is that if I were suffering from that kind of pain - ie, the pain of hair loss - and then someone knocked on my door and told me a nuclear bomb was on its way here from North Korea, or that my best friend had just been hit by a bus and killed, or that a 6 metre wave was about to hit my house and sweep 250,000 of my neighbours (and possibly myself) out to sea, the hair loss pain would be WAY down the line in my 'list of top 10 pains'.
As I said before, its great you're so enthused about the whole thing, but I just feel there are bigger issues where your enthusiasm could be made better use of, particularly as you live in Japan, which is dealing with far bigger issues than hair loss, or the side issues surrounding it.
I think sometimes we just need to be grown men and start prioritizing the issues we have in our lives, and the issues we tackle. If I were to tell you right now that I dont like your glasses, would you then go into an 'OMG, I'm being picked on and I'm the subject of anti-glasses hate speech' rant?
The point of this site, and this forum, is for conversation, chat and support for anyone with a 'bald' issue, whether the issue is positive or negative, and that includes you. My own feeling is that you're taking the whole thing a little far. Its up to you if you want to do that, obviously, but my own feeling is that its a little pointless to zoom in on one issue - hair loss - in such a deep way when there are far bigger issues out there to tackle, including those on your very doorstep. This isnt to belittle anyone dealing with the trauma of hairloss - because I know from many posts on this board that a lot of guys really do suffer - but even they would agree that there are bigger issues going on in the world.
As for your own son, you have no idea whether he'll be bald or not, or whether he'll enjoy being bald or not. My father was totally bald, yet I have a full head of hair. Nothing in life is guaranteed except death and taxes, and you should let your son deal with his own issues (or even non-issues) if and when the time comes, and be there to support him at that time. From what I saw in the picture you had in your profile, he's only about 3. Let him enjoy his childhood before you start to obsess over something that may never happen when he's 23, because you obsessing is likely to make him obsess, once he's old enough to know what daddy is obsessing about.
And I'm pleased you like my picture, thank you
I'm not from the UK though. I live in the UK, but I'm not from it.
-
#17 by Razor X on 01 Oct, 2011 19:03
-
The point of this site, and this forum, is for conversation, chat and support for anyone with a 'bald' issue, whether the issue is positive or negative, and that includes you. My own feeling is that you're taking the whole thing a little far. Its up to you if you want to do that, obviously, but my own feeling is that its a little pointless to zoom in on one issue - hair loss - in such a deep way when there are far bigger issues out there to tackle, including those on your very doorstep. This isnt to belittle anyone dealing with the trauma of hairloss - because I know from many posts on this board that a lot of guys really do suffer - but even they would agree that there are bigger issues going on in the world.
And aside from that, it is customary upon joining to introduce oneself to the group before asking everyone to join in on some crusade. -
#18 by buddha on 02 Oct, 2011 00:14
-
As far as any misquoting/taking out of context you, brother, are forgiven. I don't really take offense to that but, like others have said, spare me the crusade. From the beginnings of my hair loss going bald was never a big issue. In my intro I wrote about having hair down to my shoulder blades one day and making a decision to shave my skull so that the very next day my dome was slick and smooth. That transition never bothered me.
I know that suffering is different for every person. We also have issues that each of us is passionate about. I applaud your passion about this topic even though I don't happen to see the connection between hair loss and hate speech. I probably have causes and issues that not many people in the forum would agree with. But they're my causes and I feel no real need to seek out support for my beliefs.
All that being said I offer my apology for my comment about spending too much time on the computer. Welcome to the forum! -
#19 by timtak on 02 Oct, 2011 06:02
-
"Nobody here is hurting"
That is just so wrong! For a start there is me, a bit, when I am watching those damn commercials at least:-) I am doing a search of these forums for the word "sleep," to see if folks loose sleep over being bald or balding.
Not all the following quotes mention sleep but they do mention hurt. I am sure I could find lots more if I searched on other keywords.
william writes
now I can sleep without worrying about how my hair will be when I wake up in the morning.
dodger writes
When I think back on the lost sleep and tension on introducing the new me, I laugh about it.
cursedforlife writes
I made a thread on here a while back expressing my concern about being a young bald guy and the way people react towards/treat you...people on this site aren't willing to acknowledge that in some cases an extreme bias exists towards bald people and that it can have a huge affect on your life.
Jazz writes My hair line was high and my hair so thin. It sounds a bit pathetic but there were nights when i was crying myself to sleep about it....losing your hair so young is the hardest thing ive ever faced. Will stick around because i know there are more young guys out there like me that feel like its the end of the world and i definately want to give any advice i can to help.
Nik writes Last night was also the first night in 3 months that I've been able to sleep properly. Can't say I'm not stressing over it but I am starting to come to terms with the fact that this is the only route for me moving forward.
Razorx writes I just couldn't stand it anymore and knew I'd never get to sleep unless I was completely bald again.
Jack21 writesits just awful that we are so strongly conditioned to loathe our own baldness that some men go their whole lives trapped under a rug. And Jack21's whole thread Just took the plunge after 10 years of living a lie is moving.
Junglephone writes I didn't sleep for two nights.
Saintc writes this really bugs me. (See the rest of the post where Saintc mentions panic)
Morphen writes I remember when I had hair and it was falling out I would actually lose sleep because I was worried about how it looked and I would obsess over wanting to shave it but always being too scared to do it.
Sloppy101 writes writes Ok so my problem is i am so scared to go bald. I have always had a good set of hair and i feel that is how people notice me as me. This may sound un realistic but i dont want to get a wife then i go bald and she ends up not liking me anymore. I figure i wont benoticeabley going bald until 25 but i cannot stop thinking about it. It is always on my mind. I cant sleep, i cant socialize normally, i just cant get past this.
Ben34 writes I couldn't sleep the night I buzzed my head, as I was anxious about the responses at work. ... On my bad days, my self esteem is rather destroyed.
Scott writesThe decision over whether or not to shave my head caused extreme stress and sleeplessness as I was gripped with fear ...I’m convinced that my apprehension to shave my head was a result of society’s perception of bald men. For years, modern media portrayed men as sexy and attractive only if they had a thick head of hair; whereas if they were bald, they must ride Harley’s or be troublemakers. I had watched numerous late-night infomercials from various companies touting their hair restoration miracles. It felt as if the companies knew I would be watching as they demonstrated just how lonely, unsuccessful, and desperate balding men are to the opposite sex. My self-esteem tumbled every time I witnessed one of those spectacles and I, like so many other men, felt so struck with fear that I would actually consider enduring painful hair restoration procedures or purchasing what were obviously quick-fix products.
Slowhand writes since last night I've been so pumped for this I couldn't sleep! Seriously I'm so tired right now. But today at 12:30 the deed will be done, and now I know there will be no regrets!
If SBG wasen't around, I'm not sure if I wouldn've gone through with this. My friends don't seem to understand the delima of thinning hair...
There is lots of hurt, and there are people to blame (to an extent)
I will write a self introduction now. -
#20 by tomgallagher on 02 Oct, 2011 06:31
-
I think everybody has made their point.
-
#21 by timtak on 02 Oct, 2011 06:50
-
"I think everybody has made their point." !
I have not but, perhaps this means, "Shut up Tim, we all want to think that we, and everyone else, are happy, cool, and there is no real social stigma associated with being bald, sly or not."
-
#22 by Chavster on 02 Oct, 2011 06:52
-
So Tom, about your library card... did you read all the books just once or were you a repeat reader?
-
#23 by Razor X on 02 Oct, 2011 06:54
-
And there you go taking things out of context and misquoting people again.
-
#24 by timtak on 02 Oct, 2011 07:23
-
My name is Tim (Timothy Takemoto). My previous photo showed my daughter not my son:-) Here we are as family
http://www.flickr.com/photos/nihonbunka/6191134538/in/photostream
You are right that my son may not go bald but, both my father's line and my wifes father's lineage is bald. My dad occasionaly wears a wig
http://www.flickr.com/photos/gordonandgrizelda/3115999512/in/photostream
but generally not
http://www.flickr.com/photos/gordonandgrizelda/2842463519/in/photostream
and here is my grand daddy Roland (RIP) whom I admire
http://www.flickr.com/photos/gordonandgrizelda/2335791758/
And, I just realise, there is a photo of my great grandfather baldy too
http://www.flickr.com/photos/gordonandgrizelda/2340953944
I felt in myself from a very young age that I was born to be bald, that bald is me. Naturally. And naturally I feel that it is not right, not polite, to diss it, much anyway.
I am sorry if I have misquoted anyone. It took me a long time to assemble all those quotes. Perhaps I should have taken longer over it to be sure that I did not misquote. I did try.
What I wanted to demonstrate was that it is bs that there is no hurting. There is heaps of hurting. Masses and masses. Hundreds of thousands of sleeplesss nights.
And there is a billion dollar industry that may be promoting negative attitudes towards baldness. Ouch. -
#25 by tomgallagher on 02 Oct, 2011 07:43
-
So Tom, about your library card... did you read all the books just once or were you a repeat reader?
Certain books that I enjoyed very much I would go back and read many times Andy. Thanks for asking. -
#26 by Chavster on 02 Oct, 2011 07:47
-
So Tom, about your library card... did you read all the books just once or were you a repeat reader?
Certain books that I enjoyed very much I would go back and read many times Andy. Thanks for asking.
Oh its my ultimate pleasure. Thank you for thanking me.
I also often find that reading a book more than once can certainly stimulate far more than skimming the pages just once. -
#27 by buddha on 03 Oct, 2011 02:50
-
So Tom, about your library card... did you read all the books just once or were you a repeat reader?
Certain books that I enjoyed very much I would go back and read many times Andy. Thanks for asking.
Oh its my ultimate pleasure. Thank you for thanking me.
I also often find that reading a book more than once can certainly stimulate far more than skimming the pages just once.
Buahahahahaha. Beautiful!
-
#28 by timtak on 03 Oct, 2011 06:16
-
Well, since there do not seem to be people that agree with me, I guess I am probably wrong. Drat. And I have been thinking about this for quite a while so the overall gist of what I am saying is not simply a quick mistake, it is something that I have thought lots about and still made a mistake.
I take buddha's point that all commercials are in a sense 'insulting.' Commericals are there to make us buy products, to make us feel that we need products, and perhaps it might be argued that they try and make us feel insecure if we do not have their products, or at least quite a lot of them do. I know a commercial for toilet air freshener. It seems to try and instill viewers with the feeling that they should worry about the smell of their faeces. Does this advert play on our insecurities? Is this anti-defecator propaganda?
Or again as GSGUK points out, no one gets upset (afaik) about any spectacle wearer propoganda. No one seems to be saying "Why are you pushing contacts?"
There are lots of commercials for anti wrinkle creams and potions. Some people pay lots of money to get their anti-wrinkle potions, but no one (afaik) has any issue with wrinkle cream commercials.
Perhaps this is simply my complexes talking. I do have a "complex" about being bald. I do still hurt a bit. I don't like being bald. I would rather have hair. So rather than chill, I am probably over-reacting towards commercials.
What don't I like about commercials?
Jack 21 wrote on that really interesting thread "You're only as sick as your secrets". I really like that. It seems to me that if I can say something, if I can talk and share something, then I am okay whatever it is. And that is why this forum is so great it gives people the opportunity to talk about it.
The thing that I hate most about commericals, or the commercials I hate most, are those that promote the idea that we can not talk about our baldness, the commercials that tell bald and non-bald people alike "baldness is a secret,"or "Baldness is something that should not be spoken about." If they were just selling their pieces saying "You'Ll look much better in our wig" then I have not problem with that. But when commercials start to present the idea that a situation is so bad that one can not talk about it, then (even) I feel threatened.
-
#29 by buddha on 04 Oct, 2011 01:10
-
Perhaps this is simply my complexes talking. I do have a "complex" about being bald. I do still hurt a bit. I don't like being bald. I would rather have hair. So rather than chill, I am probably over-reacting towards commercials.
OK, I get it now. You, Timtak, still hurt a bit about being bald. So why not write about that and allow the people of the forum to offer you support and encouragement. What you've been doing, perhaps unknowingly, is rocking us back on our heels in a manner of speaking by shoving the crusade in our faces. If you're hurtin', brother, just say that you're hurtin'. It's gonna take a helluva lot more guts to be honest with us about what's really going on with you but I'm thinking that it will be a lot more rewarding because you will finally get that support you've been looking for. You can't get it while you're keeping us all at arm's length with all the other bull$h!t.