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#15 by JasonR on 01 May, 2007 23:18
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Working on a pic!
I'm extremely self concious about it...and it's definitely more pronounced than others. It seems like it could be fixed with surgery....and I'm willing to go that route. I've tried...and it's really hard for me to get over it. :\ -
#16 by Stu on 01 May, 2007 23:51
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Jason,
There is always something that a person would like to change about himself/herself, but I think you're being too hard on yourself. From my picture, my head shape looks pretty good, but from the side, it's oblong, and I don't like it. I always tend to check out other shaved heads, and I get jealous when I see a perfectly round head. So it's normal to be apprehensive, but once you shave your head, you will probably just obsess about getting it perfectly smooth (nothing wrong with that). I know it might seem harder for you since you're younger, but hey, I didn't have my first relationship with someone until I was 25 (married her by the way), and I was already losing my hair. If you already have your hair extremely short, there is not going to be much of a change when you shave it as far as what others will see. Most guys here seem to have found the reaction to be a non-event. Don't mess with surgery though, or you could end up looking like this:
http://www.snopes.com/photos/people/jackson.asp
We're here for you future sly bro. -
#17 by Ian on 02 May, 2007 01:51
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Ive noticed ive got a few lumps & bumps round the back of my head,but as i cant see them its not a major worry.Behind my left ear it dips in a bit.
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#18 by Tyler on 02 May, 2007 03:03
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Jason, I know how you feel bro. I know it's hard to get past your view of your appearance; especially since you're the one that looks at yourself in the mirror everyday. I know because I have a physical deformity, two HUGE scars on my chest and side, that I see every morning when I get dressed and every night when I take off my shirt. Heck, it's in almost half my pictures that I took on vacation.
I could think of myself as a freak, I have before, but I don't anymore. I see myself as unique. It's PART of what shaped and molded me. It taught me lessons that I learned way earlier in life that have been a huge part of the successes that I've had later in life. Sure, I can conceal them with a shirt, but they show in other ways. Like when I try to run a mile or try to get life insurance.
I'm not trying to make you feel sorry for me; you shouldn't. I don't. I'm just trying to show you that you can get past YOUR perception of your appearance. Heck, I did. Once I did, it opened up a world of relief and confidence. You learn that people are too worried about themselves to give a damn about the way you look. Sure, there may be people that say something, but they're just trying to hide their insecurities.
If it's something you really want to do, then go for it. Feel the fear and do it anyway! If you don't like it, grow it back and I doubt anyone will remember it a month or two from now. Shoot, probably even a week or two.
I don't even need to see a picture to know that it will look good. Why? Because it really doesn't matter what I think. I could think it was the best look for you, or a completely ridiculous one. But, if you think different, that's how others are going to perceive you - the way you think it looks. If you think it looks good and support a shaved with confidence, so will others.
So, in short. Shave it and stand behind your decision. Give it 30 days of looking at it positively. Then, when the 30 days is up, reevaluate your options. If you go straight for surgery then you will probably ask yourself "what if" the rest of your life. -
#19 by Ian on 02 May, 2007 03:58
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Pretty much summed it up there Tyler...
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#20 by Tom McGarry. on 02 May, 2007 05:06
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Jason, I know how you feel bro. I know it's hard to get past your view of your appearance; especially since you're the one that looks at yourself in the mirror everyday. I know because I have a physical deformity, two HUGE scars on my chest and side, that I see every morning when I get dressed and every night when I take off my shirt. Heck, it's in almost half my pictures that I took on vacation.
Awsome post Tyler, you nailed it right there.
I could think of myself as a freak, I have before, but I don't anymore. I see myself as unique. It's PART of what shaped and molded me. It taught me lessons that I learned way earlier in life that have been a huge part of the successes that I've had later in life. Sure, I can conceal them with a shirt, but they show in other ways. Like when I try to run a mile or try to get life insurance.
I'm not trying to make you feel sorry for me; you shouldn't. I don't. I'm just trying to show you that you can get past YOUR perception of your appearance. Heck, I did. Once I did, it opened up a world of relief and confidence. You learn that people are too worried about themselves to give a damn about the way you look. Sure, there may be people that say something, but they're just trying to hide their insecurities.
If it's something you really want to do, then go for it. Feel the fear and do it anyway! If you don't like it, grow it back and I doubt anyone will remember it a month or two from now. Shoot, probably even a week or two.
I don't even need to see a picture to know that it will look good. Why? Because it really doesn't matter what I think. I could think it was the best look for you, or a completely ridiculous one. But, if you think different, that's how others are going to perceive you - the way you think it looks. If you think it looks good and support a shaved with confidence, so will others.
So, in short. Shave it and stand behind your decision. Give it 30 days of looking at it positively. Then, when the 30 days is up, reevaluate your options. If you go straight for surgery then you will probably ask yourself "what if" the rest of your life. -
#21 by PigPen on 02 May, 2007 07:55
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Tyler usually does, he rolls like that.
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#22 by champ007 on 02 May, 2007 20:50
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BTW the graphic is a profile view of my head...if there was any misunderstanding.
JasonR, If that graphic is of your head, then the only thing people will notice is that you have no ears!!
But on the serious side, I was worried about my family inherited second chin, and in my main thread a goatee was suggested which I now have. But what I have noticed since I have shaved is people now look in my eyes when they talk to me, not my head or chin or goatee. Before they noticed my balding head with thin bangs trying to hide a receeding hairline.
Also, welcome to SBG! -
#23 by JasonR on 22 May, 2007 22:35
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Thanks for the replies! Tyler..I've learned that scars make a person more unique...I've got my fair share of them. I'm not bald by choice...I started balding (receding) around 16...which is strange because all of the males in the family have a full head of hair. Strangely, I've had the same receding hair line for a while that's gotten slightly worse, but the hair on top of my head is really thin. I just use a trimmer with no guard to shave my head. I actually like being bald, and I think it's definitely unique. But I just can't get over the "bump" in my head. I've tried, and tried, and tried. I can put up the one or two pictures if I can find them...
It doesn't seem bad enough to require MAJOR surgery, but if I can get a completely round head, why not do it? That's the only way I feel that I can freely walk around bald with complete confidence. I am a confident guy, and I would say that's the major insecurity of very few. I just don't know who or what doctor to start talking to. I'm also very concerned with a Doctor doing his job right. -
#24 by Tyler on 22 May, 2007 23:16
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Jason, I'd love to see a pic. I think that would help me give a more factually honest opinion.
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#25 by CDN Meathead on 23 May, 2007 01:54
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Hey Jason, Hows things? No body has a perfect anything let alone a perfect head. I mean in my case it's not so much my head but the fact that I have ears by Express Vu (satellite service provider for my Americian Friends) and glasses by Hubble. Don't worry about other peoples what others will think, do what YOU want. If every one worried about others perceptions than we'd all be basket cases, and I'd be out of a job. It's all about you brother.
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#26 by YOSP on 23 May, 2007 04:27
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CDN Meathead...welcome to the site brother!
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#27 by YOSP on 23 May, 2007 04:34
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Jason...welcome the site...as far as the shape of your head issue, I guarantee you are wasting too much time and energy worrying about it...shave the head, let yourself get used to it and the confidence will come, if its attracting women as well that you are questioning, the ones that you want to attract are the ones that care more about the type of person you are, not thhe shape of your head...I know it sounds like BS, but you have to give yourself time to figure it out anyway, so take the plunge, read some more posts on this site and you will fell better, I promise ya!
Besides you don't wann go the route that I did and woryy for the next 7yrs and waste tons of $$$ trying to hide under a "piece" or do a combover, or just have thinning hair, the "sly" way feels so much better and you will feel the confidence almost immediately! -
#28 by froze on 24 May, 2007 09:24
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New Sly guy! Have you looked at my head! Brother you don't look bad at all!
Like the others try it out! You will like it!
Besides that I'm 54 and really don't care what the population says!
I'm getting WOW looks in spite of the noggin (plus the turkey neck!)
Do it Young Sly Guy!!!
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#29 by Rhymez on 25 May, 2007 19:17
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hey, now let me say something: when I was 5-6 years old, I was playing in the park, and some kids were throwing sand in my hair, and I ended up getting ringworm (No longer have this THANK GOD!!!!) but, unfortunately, left an indentation on the top of my head, (Scar), and I ended up loosing my hair. (I ended up growing it back later, but my doc said I was lucky, because i could have permanently went bald). Now, i wear a hat once in a while (Not all the time, because I normally loose them) but when I go outside, nobody ever sais anything about it. so, dont wory about it. Now, unfortunately, there are a few people that like to poke fun, put just ignore it. Normal people will not bother you about it.
