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The hardest part of getting older....... by Mikekoz13 on 29 Jun, 2010 10:06
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So next week I turn 50 years old. As we age we all have things that we find difficult to deal with. It might be health issues, physical limitations, etc.
A few weeks back I had an interesting conversation with an older Lady (i'd say about 70 or so) in my local pharmacy in town where I live. She was ringing up a few items I was purchasing and asked me to verify my birthday. When I did she commented that I would be turning 50 soon. I kind of laughed and said, "Yeah, every year my body lets me know I'm a little older".
She laughed and said, "Honey you're young, wait until you get my age. That's when things really get tough". Then she asked me this simple question..... "What is it that you're finding is hard about getting older"?
I paused for just a moment and said, "The hardest part of getting older for me is watching my Dad get old. He was like Superman when I was growing up. Now he's an old man that I'm watching visibly fade every year. I'm having a lot of trouble dealing with my Dad aging".
And then I looked at her face and there were a few seconds of silence and I realized that we both had tears in our eyes. SHe grabbed my hand and patted it and said, "You're a good boy... your Dad must be proud".
I thanked her for her kind words and scooted out the door before that damn tear ran down my cheek.
So what is it for you?? What's the hardest part of gowing older for you? -
#1 by Robmeister on 29 Jun, 2010 11:59
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"The hardest part of getting older for me is watching my Dad get old. He was like Superman when I was growing up. Now he's an old man that I'm watching visibly fade every year. I'm having a lot of trouble dealing with my Dad aging".
I'm with ya on that one, Mike. Same goes for my mom. -
#2 by D.A.L.U.I. on 29 Jun, 2010 13:27
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Tough one, really tough question. Watching our loved ones, family and friends, age reminds us that we cannot stay the hands of time one second. But, hard--that for me means not being able to share the little joys, laughs, pleasures that life carries with it, share them with my family and friends that have died. That pang, the desire to share something, and knowing that you can't, hurts but also makes me enjoy the moment somewhat more too, because I'm not just doing it for myself anymore, I'm doing it for and remembering them too. Tough question, it reminds us that we are not graced with the knowledge of the number of our days, nor the days of those who we know and love. I guess we must keep the lamps trimmed at all times, enjoying the time we have with our family and friends now, for tomorrow will come, at at sometime they, and we, must die. Dum Vivam, Vivamus
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#3 by Ming the Merciless on 29 Jun, 2010 16:45
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Watching my vitality drain away, feeling each year less strength and endurance. Looking at the accumulation of decades of photographs of my woodsy walking and knowing that I will never again hike the trails up the mountains that I once did not so "long" ago--and these are not the Rockies, these are the Appalachians. Coming up the basement stairs is now something I have to plan. And it's not as if I'm in my eighties, even--it's still a handful of months until full Social Security is mine to collect.
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#4 by herronm on 30 Jun, 2010 14:06
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Mike, this is a really tough brain quiz. I do not seeing my Mom get older, I've already lost my Dad and both in laws.
Personally, it hurts me when others think I'm too old. I'm almost 56 and have been out of work for over 14 months. I know that I've lost out of a few jobs because of age (can't prove it or they'd have a nice lawsuit). Age brings maturity, experience and knowledge...it doesn't mean that I'm out of touch, slow or less energetic. -
#5 by wpruitt on 30 Jun, 2010 18:05
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Your mind writing checks your body can't cash!
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#6 by cvasara on 30 Jun, 2010 19:52
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Personally, it hurts me when others think I'm too old. I'm almost 56 and have been out of work for over 14 months. I know that I've lost out of a few jobs because of age (can't prove it or they'd have a nice lawsuit). Age brings maturity, experience and knowledge...it doesn't mean that I'm out of touch, slow or less energetic.
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I can tell you that 56 most certainly isn't too old, especially from the 56 year old's perspective, and has been out of work that long.
But -
Your statements about "lost out on jobs, etc, etc, and can't prove it, or they would have a nice lawsuit" is really the primary reason that employers have to think twice about hiring someone in their late 40s and older. An employer, especially in a small company, has to look at that lawsuit possibility, as well as benefits, such as insurance, the added tax burden, training, for what will probably be for a short term return. So the fact that an older perspective employee might bring the knowledge that would really be welcomed, it won't be available for 10 to 20 years going forward. Even when the employer is over 65, he has to look out for the good of his company that he built, usually from day one, from the ground up. And unfortunately, that isn't done with older persons. -
#7 by cvasara on 30 Jun, 2010 20:12
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Oops, I forgot the main Question of the subject.
Well, I found that I can't out run my kid anymore. He's 45
But I can still drink more beer than he can. -
#8 by Razor X on 30 Jun, 2010 21:21
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Your statements about "lost out on jobs, etc, etc, and can't prove it, or they would have a nice lawsuit" is really the primary reason that employers have to think twice about hiring someone in their late 40s and older. An employer, especially in a small company, has to look at that lawsuit possibility, as well as benefits, such as insurance, the added tax burden, training, for what will probably be for a short term return. So the fact that an older perspective employee might bring the knowledge that would really be welcomed, it won't be available for 10 to 20 years going forward. Even when the employer is over 65, he has to look out for the good of his company that he built, usually from day one, from the ground up. And unfortunately, that isn't done with older persons.
What lawsuit possibility? The possibility that a person in their late 40s or more will sue if they are let go? That can only happen if the dismissed employee can prove that age was the reason for his/her dismissal. You might just as well make the claim that employers won't hire minorities for the same reason.
An applicant in his/her late 40s still has nearly 20 years until retirement age, and a 55 year old has 10 years, so how, exactly is that a short term return for the employer? The biggest disadvantage to hiring people in those age brackets is that they usually have higher salary demands so it may be cheaper to go with someone younger.
I do think there's some validity to the argument that it's hard for someone over 60 to find employment because they're too close to retirement age.
Herronm, hang in there. You have plenty of good years left. I'm sorry to hear that you've had such a rough time finding employment, but remember that there are plenty of younger people in the same boat. Times are tough out there. I hope things improve for you soon. -
#9 by buddha on 01 Jul, 2010 03:17
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For me the hardest part about getting older (I'm 57) is acceptance of the fact that I am going to die one day.
I wish I had more to say about this. Words fail me at this time.
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#10 by Mikekoz13 on 01 Jul, 2010 05:12
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For me the hardest part about getting older (I'm 57) is acceptance of the fact that I am going to die one day.
I wish I had more to say about this. Words fail me at this time.
The thought of dieing doesn't bother me because I figure that when I turn 50 next week, I'm only half way done. 50 more to go! -
#11 by schro on 01 Jul, 2010 08:11
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I'm beginning to think that Koz & I might be related in some way because, ONCE AGAIN, I HAVE TO AGREE WITH KOZ.
I view my dad & aging in the same way as Koz. As a kid, my dad could do no wrong. He was great in an office environment, people loved and respected him, and was one of the best amateur golfers on the west coast in his youth (Wilson Golf was prepared to sponsor him if he went out on the PGA Tour). Now, he's 70 (not old, I know) and he's clearly showing his age. He's hunched over (still plays pretty solid golf....can still shoot even par on occasion), and definitely has some physical limitations he won't attend to (his stubbornness has become a problem also).
Although I'm 44, I certainly don't feel it. True I'm not in the kind of shape I could be, but life is good. -
#12 by Mikekoz13 on 01 Jul, 2010 08:21
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I'm beginning to think that Koz & I might be related in some way because, ONCE AGAIN, I HAVE TO AGREE WITH KOZ.
You know... we do sort of look alike........... and I'm having this strange urge to hear "Cheeseburger in Paradise".........
Peace little Brother
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#13 by Magoo on 03 Jul, 2010 11:33
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For me the hardest part about getting older (I'm 57) is acceptance of the fact that I am going to die one day.
I wish I had more to say about this. Words fail me at this time.
Buddha I,m 67.5 .....and all I can add is take and enjoy each day. Thats all we really have. The Buddist say keep your mind on the present moment. -
#14 by Sgt. Pate on 03 Jul, 2010 12:23
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The hardest part of getting older for me is... ah, I think it's... ah, well... oh crap! I FORGOT!
Seriously though, I really don't like being talked to like I'm somehow now less intelligent as I am hitting 59. I have had sales people noticeably shift how they talk to me like I was a in-firmed old fool! Pisses me off!
If that's not bad enough... having some hottie hold the door for you and call you "SIR"! 