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Wife: I don't have to like it, do I?
by
Nate Finch
on 01 Sep, 2015 21:13
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I've been losing my hair for about a decade (I'm 38), receding temples from my father's side, male pattern baldness from my mother's. It's the male pattern that really bothered me, because I never see it except when it gets caught in a photo. Anyway, I've been buzzing it shorter and shorter for about a year... started with a 3, then a 2 then a 1... I've been dropping suggestions to my wife that I may shave it sometime soon. Usually when I say that, she doesn't really say anything. This last time she said "well, do it soon so you can try it out before the kids' school starts". That was enough of a go ahead for me, so I did it one morning before she got up.
When she saw it she sort of winced and didn't say anything. Later that day she said "I don't have to like it, do I?"
Thanks for the support, honey!
It's funny, when I posted a picture to Facebook, all my immediate family disliked it, but a lot of more distant family and friends said it looks good. I'm just starting to get used to it after a week. I don't look so much like Bizzaro-Nate anymore. Still Slightly-Odd-Nate, but I can deal with that for a while longer... I've never been vain, so I often just forget I've shaved it until I pass a mirror.
I'm glad to find this forum and find the 30 day rule. Before I came here, I was going to ask how long it usually takes for yourself and others close to you to get used to it... now I know
I can do 30 days. Hell, I'm 1/4 the way there already.
-Nate
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#1
by
Cave Dweller
on 01 Sep, 2015 22:55
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Welcome, Nate.
Sorry your dome got that reaction. Give your wife and family time to adjust. Soon, they will not even notice it when they see you.
I was fifty-one when I shaved off my horseshoe, and my adolescent son laughed his head off when he first saw me. The nicest statement my seventy-plus mom gave was, "You probably will want to grow it back." It took her about six months to accept it. She actually likes it now.
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#2
by
tobler1
on 02 Sep, 2015 01:47
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I think it looks pretty fantastic. Hope you're enjoying it.
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#3
by
Sir Harry
on 02 Sep, 2015 03:33
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Welcome, Nate! One of the good things about the 30-day rule is that it gives friends and family as well as the head shaver time to adjust. It looks good, stay with it.
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#4
by
nuts
on 02 Sep, 2015 04:26
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Looks good. The 30 day rule is both for you and also family and friends to adjust to the new look and by then no one really notices or comments. It is just you.
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#5
by
bennett11
on 02 Sep, 2015 05:42
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It takes a bit of time for family and friends to adjust. stay with it they will accept that it is you. you look good.
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#6
by
jbrit25
on 02 Sep, 2015 06:13
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It looks really good on you. Keep going.
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#7
by
buddha
on 02 Sep, 2015 07:04
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When she saw it she sort of winced and didn't say anything. Later that day she said "I don't have to like it, do I?"
Float that line on her the next time she comes back from the beautiful parlor. I guarantee you'll be getting the silent treatment for a while after that. Amazing how some women have learned to devalue and disrespect the men in their lives in this society.
And as I ponder this a good answer to her question would have been "no, you don't have to like it, you just have to get used to it".
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#8
by
Nate Finch
on 02 Sep, 2015 11:32
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Yeah, I said she didn't have to like it, but that I hoped she'd get used to it eventually. She didn't say it in a nasty tone of voice or anything, she was actually kind of apologetic... but yeah, a nicer response would have been appreciated.
Anyway, we'll see how it goes. It's definitely growing on me (heh).
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#9
by
jbrit25
on 02 Sep, 2015 11:36
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It took me a solid two weeks to get used to it. I already think I look weird in pictures with hair. You'll get there man.
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#10
by
Semi-Sly
on 02 Sep, 2015 15:05
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I think that you look pretty fantastic! Any you know what; it is really just the "change" that causes some of those reactions. If you had been shaving for years and then suddenly appeared with an MPB "fringe" or worse, a combover, you would be getting the very same reactions!
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#11
by
Hingatao
on 02 Sep, 2015 17:11
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Looks good! Your wife and family will get used to it.
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#12
by
mrzed
on 02 Sep, 2015 17:31
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No, she does not have to like it, but keep it up and it won't be long and your shiny bald head will become normal and she will get to like it.
My wife was not crazy at first, but it did not take too long. Now she really enjoys coming along and rubbing my head. I like it too.
It will take awhile before YOU and others come to realize that this bald Nate really is you. It took me awhile. I was sold on the bald head look, but it took awhile before I got used to that really being me in the reflection or photos. Now, it's me. Yep. That's the way I look.
From those who have never met you, you'll get complements. You look great with a bald head. Hope you keep it up.
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#13
by
Nate Finch
on 02 Sep, 2015 19:56
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Thanks, everyone. I'm sure I'll get used to it, an so will everyone else. And yeah, people who've never met me before aren't going to know I haven't always been bald... and I know I always thought bald guys look pretty damn cool, even before I shaved.
Very glad to have found this site. You guys are awesome.
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#14
by
Tyler
on 03 Sep, 2015 01:04
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Hey Nate, it looks great! Wives are usually the first critics in the beginning but often change after they see how happy their husbands are after the decision to shave.