Just joined...but still haven't joined... - page 1 -

• Just joined...but still haven't joined... by NYric on 05 Aug, 2008 19:32
• Hey all,
  Have actually been happy to find this site and read everyone's postings. Lots of positive energy, good stuff.
  
  Been wearing the fake do for almost 20 years, and I'm only 38! Ugh, I feel stupid even saying it. Anyway, hating it now because it's impact on me is the opposite of why I originally went down the road, to increase my confidence. Now I'm one of the, sit in the back of the room, never go in the water, nervous toward the end of the month, sacred to death someone wil notice kinda guys. Still wearing it, and hating it.   
  
  Why haven't I taken the plunge? Well, I guess like many, concerned about what people will think/say....going to work on a Monday looking so different than I did on Friday that I'm not even sure how I'd deal. My girlfriend is encouraging me which helps, but still...
  
  So...have an opportunity to change locations (within my same company)...so thinking about taking a week vacation, ditching this thing, shaving the rest and starting new. THinking a week's vacation in the sun should (I hope!) even out the tan a bit. Any thoughts or experience on that?
  
  I get excited just thinking about the freedom...and about swimming again! ..but still very nervous about it and hoping I don't chicken out when the time comes (in about a month or so)
  
  Anyway, any advice or positive karma you feel like dishing my way, I'm willing to take!
  
  Thanks so much for the love and the help you've already shared!   
• #1 by MagmaBabe on 05 Aug, 2008 19:36
• Hi NYric.. you've come to the right place hun, welcome! 
• #2 by dog20 on 05 Aug, 2008 19:40
• Man up son... you WILL get reactions, but you got to not let them get to you and if you think you'll be happier without the hairpiece then what are you waiting for?  If you want to lessen the shock value, you can just show up to work with your hair buzzed.  Then use a lower # guard and finally shave it all off.
• #3 by Razor X on 05 Aug, 2008 19:44
• We all have the same apprehension -- especially about showing up at work with a new look.  And 99% of the time, it turns out to be a big non-event.  I know that sounds hard to believe, but it's true.  Usually the attention is all positive and after a few minutes, people forget all about it and go on about their own business.
  
  A week's vacation is a good idea.  A lot of guys do this.  It gives you a chance to get used to going out in public with a bare head.  It's a lot easier to do it among strangers that you will never see again.  When you get back, you'll feel a bit appprhensive, but it's short-lived and you'll feel much, much better once it's over.  Sort of like ripping off a band-aid.  Just take a deep breath, and do it quickly, and when it's over you'll find it wasn't as bad as you expected.
  
  Good luck -- and welcome to the forum.
  
  
• #4 by Robmeister on 05 Aug, 2008 20:57
• Quote from: NYric on 05 Aug, 2008 19:32

  
  My girlfriend is encouraging me
  
  

  
  OMG!! That is 99% of the battle won right there, bro !!
  
  
  
  

  Quote from: NYric on 05 Aug, 2008 19:32

  
  have an opportunity to change locations (within my same company)...so thinking about taking a week vacation, ditching this thing, shaving the rest and starting new.
  
  

  
  Another MAJOR advantage !!!
  
  The tan will not make or break most reactions.....but the time and new location will make the transition easier on YOUR MIND...
  
  Be REAL careful not to try to tan up there too quick....it takes time to s-l-o-w-l-y nurse a good healthy glow with lots of TLC each day.
  
  As Razor said...we've all dealt with the same exact apprehensions.....and in 99.99999% of cases...we are our own worst critic.....no one REALLY cares that much.
  
  I think with the girlfriend on yer side and having some time off and a new start somewhere.....you're ahead of A LOT of guys as far as HEAD STARTS.
• #5 by OzPete on 05 Aug, 2008 21:11
• Welcome NY ric! Just shave it - you know you want to! 
• #6 by Scott on 05 Aug, 2008 22:25
• Welcome NYric to SBG!  Believe me, we were all apprehensive before shaving the dome for the 1st time, but as the guys have said, most of the time we're our own worst critic about our looks.  You got your g/f's support so there you go!  Whether you transfer locations or not, once you take the plunge and people have there first reactions, it'll really be a non-issue!  Good luck and keep us posted!
• #7 by jhickman on 05 Aug, 2008 23:13
• Welcome ric.  Like the guys are saying, for most of us it turned out to be a big non-event.  It takes guts, but looking back I think the transition was the most fun part! 
  
  After the first few interactions, you can start messing with people.  Tell them you had a Britney spears moment, or my favorite was to tell them "I know what you're going to ask, does the carpet match the curtains?"  and if its a female you can add "if you play your cards right you might find out".   
  
  Some of the people here warned their friends/family/coworkers first to ease them into it.
  
  Good luck and again, welcome.
• #8 by Tyler on 06 Aug, 2008 00:20
• Ric, welcome to SBG!
  
  If you're looking to make the move just because of your hair, I'd advise not to do it for that reason.  Though, if there are other benefits then it makes sense.
  
  As for shaving your head, do it as soon as you can.  It will finally provide you the freedom you've been looking for for 20 years.
• #9 by iPelon on 06 Aug, 2008 00:34
• Dude... if you want to start off slow, that's cool.  Take that shag off a little at a time.  Do it in layers if you feel that getting it all off will be too much for you.  How ever you do it.... I'm sure it will look freakin' amazing!!!
  
  Good Luck brotha!! 
• #10 by Kojack on 06 Aug, 2008 02:26
• I was just like you NYric. I wanted to throw the rug for a good long while and I wore it a long time.
  I kept telling myself if I ever got laid off from my job I'd shave my head.
  Time went by and in spite of the bad economy, it appears my job is safe.
  That is a good thing, but damnit I still wanted to get rid of that rug. Needless to say, I just did it one day. Like you, I had the support of my GF. I mentione dusing the clippers on myself and she said "I'd love it" To be honest, as long as she's cool with it, i could care less what anyone else thinks. Best thing I've ever done.
  I can go swimming again, I can go outside without something on my head, Its a great feeling my man. Haven't felt this good in a long time.
• #11 by dagenhamjim on 06 Aug, 2008 02:30
• Welcome NY ric, The decision is yours but either way if you need any help or advice. you have found the right place to get it!
• #12 by Mikekoz13 on 06 Aug, 2008 03:56
• Welcome NYric!!! You'll get plenty of positive encouragement here........
• #13 by Rob on 06 Aug, 2008 05:30
• It's easy for me to say 'just ditch the rug', but after nearly 20 years I can see how its a big thing for you.  But it will be the right thing, I can assure you, and you won't be hidin behind something fake any more: it will be the real you.  Go for it, bro.
• #14 by Paul on 06 Aug, 2008 06:01
• The Meister hit it on the head....having your girlfriend on your side means the battle's already won.   If you are already planning a move to a new company or new location it sounds like a great plan to help you relieve some of the anxiety of the big change.   But do you really want to wait that long?  If you desire the freedom and confidence that being sly brings go for it now.  Start enjoying life and don't waste the extra month.