Confidence and Success > Relationships/Dating
Getting it off my chest
Paul:
I think what you might be hitting Vash, is the time of life when maturity and wisdom take center stage. While the physical portion of a relationship is still important we are finally realizing that there is so much more to a relationship that just that. Spending time together quietly, missing the softness of a womans touch and voice, just missing having that female perspective to times and situations in our lives. It becomes even more difficult as you get older. It has been several years now for me since I have had a serious and long lasting relationship. The women out there (if they haven't remained single) are carrying baggage from former lives and relationships, have kids and personal commitments. BUT they are still out there and looking for the man who fits they ideals as well. Keep at it. You have a lot to share bro. Some woman is going to get really lucky one day.
herronm:
Vash, keep up the search, she is out there. In fact, she is looking for you!!
My experience taught me that most of my girlfriends along the way loved me but didn't love my muscian's life style. It is hard to be away from home almost every night and the other things that go along with that. I've seen a lot of relationships and marriages breakup over that (and a lot of bands too). It evens gets harder when kids come along.
The right mate can be the best, most frustrating thing in the whole world.
Max
dog20:
I am 22 and I want the same stuff you do. I think I may have found the right girl... but she has to come by and see me again at work (since I don't know where she works now). Besides performing, do you do any other activities where you get to be around folks? I have trouble with meeting people and luckily the girl I like had worked with me for awhile. I don't know what else to say, I hope you find someone soon.
Marz:
Vash, I can relate pretty well to parts of this.
from Boots to tatts, kilts to bands... I can relate.
The best advise I can give you is to make friends with everyone you meet. Not kiss anyones ass or anything but make it a point to strike up conversation with people, find a common interest that you can both relate to.
I do this often because I feel the world is getting more and more reclusive and I like to have a sence of community. I like making small talk with people in line at the grocery store, or folks that are out for a walk in my neighborhood etc. Maybe it is because I am getting older but I realized I dont care who you are, I just know we are sharing a similar time and why make it anything less than enjoyable?
I was not always like that though, I used to be semi unapproachable just because I really didnt care if people knew me or not, I didnt care what they thought or what they had to say... "I am me, take it or leave it" is and was my mantra and realized one day, thats kinda how everyone is but how can I even make a decision like that if we all just go about our business pretending others are not there.
Once i started making it a point of reaching out to people, I found it to be very well accepted. Almost like they had a smile and conversation building up that they didnt know how to release, when the guy in line at the store (me) says something like "wow, if it rains again this year I am gonna buy a life raft", I receive a myriad of "i know, I cant believe it either, its been so crazy and my house has a leak and my laundry cant dry..." and off we go.
The point I am making (as I realize I have just typed a novelette) is that once you get used to breaking the ice and talking to people (young, old, male, female, etc.) the easier it is to break the ice with all people. It becomes part of who you are and soon enough you will find yourself talking to someone you have that "extra" interest in and your already 2 steps ahead of the game. Trying to break the ice with a woman that you are getting heart palpitations from is WAY more difficult when you are not prepared to be yourself.
Not to mention its a strange world filled with strange people and it is fun to see how much we are the same deep down.
Anyway, hope that helps some, good luck.
Mikekoz13:
My brother Marz getting it right AGAIN!!! O0
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