I have a boss who's last name is Stengle. He's a cool guy and has some pretty funny sayings that we affectionately call "Stenglisms."
There really are
Stengelisms..... by the late great Casey Stengel.
~Being with a woman all night never hurt no professional baseball player. It's staying up all night looking for a woman that does him in.
~Don't cut my throat, I may want to do that later myself.
~Don't drink in the hotel bar, that's where I do my drinking.
~I came in here and a fella asked me to have a drink. I said I don't drink. Then another fella said hear you and Joe DiMaggio aren't speaking and I said I'll take that drink.
~I don't know if he throws a spitball but he sure spits on the ball.
~I don't like them fellas who drive in two runs and let in three.
~I feel greatly honored to have a ballpark named after me, especially since I've been thrown out of so many.
~I got players with bad watches - they can't tell midnight from noon.
~It's wonderful to meet so many friends that I didn't used to like.
~Never make predictions, especially about the future.
~No baseball pitcher would be worth a darn without a catcher who could handle the hot fastball.
~Now there's three things that can happen in a ballgame: you can win, you can lose, or it can rain.
~Now there's three things you can do in a baseball game: You can win or you can lose or it can rain.
~Oldtimers, weekends, and airplane landings are alike. If you can walk away from them, they're successful.
~The trick is growing up without growing old.
~The trouble is not that players have sex the night before a game. It's that they stay out all night looking for it.
~The trouble with women umpires is that I couldn't argue with one. I'd put my arms around her and give her a little kiss.
~There are three things you can do in a baseball game. You can win, or you can lose, or it can rain.
~There comes a time in every man's life, and I've had plenty of them.
~They say some of my stars drink whiskey, but I have found that ones who drink milkshakes don't win many ball games.
~They say Yogi Berra is funny. Well, he has a lovely wife and family, a beautiful home, money in the bank, and he plays golf with millionaires. What's funny about that?
~They told me my services were no longer desired because they wanted to put in a youth program as an advance way of keeping the club going. I'll never make the mistake of being seventy again.
~When you are younger you get blamed for crimes you never committed and when you're older you begin to get credit for virtues you never possessed. It evens itself out.
~Without losers, where would the winners be?
~You gotta learn that if you don't get it by midnight, chances are you ain't gonna get it, and if you do, it ain't worth it.
~You have to go broke three times to learn how to make a living.
