Manhood

[happyharry]

Hey guys,

remember how they say puberty's the most difficult period in a person's life?

Well, I thought so too. Fortunately, I've got puberty behind me, and for a while I was in this interim period where you think you've made it - you've come out of puberty alive, your blood is no longer boiling, your hormones are now permanently elevated (rather than being on a crazy roller coaster ride), the ground has stopped shaking and things look good. You're no longer a werewolf, you're just a wolf.

Ah, but then, a few years on, you realise puberty was pretty pleasant compared to what's coming next.
For it dawns on you: I must now become a man. Oh, that sentence gives me the shivers.

YOU HAVE TO BECOME A MAN

And I'm sure you all know what that means, and that it doesn't mean having hair on your chest (or no hair on your head) or being eligible to gamble and drink. It means you've got to go out there and play the grownup's game. You've got to be responsible, have integrity, fight the fight - for yourself, the people around you, and, eventually, for the family you started. No more fooling around. No time for playing games, running and jumping or picking daisies.

It's a second, bloodier and more strenuous puberty. And you can't just sit it out like puberty. It requires you to do things, it requires your active participation...or you'll never get out of it.

Ah, manhood...

What does that mean to you? Was it a rough ride for you, and did you manage to come out on the other side? And, how bruised were you?

Share your experiences, wisdoms and philosophies, and let's explore that subject...



 

[PigPen]

I would say it still is a rough ride. I don't beleive I'm completely through it yet. When will it be behind me you ask? When I don't have to scrimp and save every last penny to buy my family stuff they want. When we can move into a bigger house, the kids have their own rooms and I've got a nice shop to work on my trucks. This is just me though.

What would I have done better or differently?

Wait to get married and have kids. By most people's standards, I'm still just a young buck...28 this year. I would have saved more of the money I was making when I was single and didn't feel guilty about working 60-80 hours each week. I certainly wouldn't have run up those damn credit cards either.

These are some of the things that I would like to teach my son about someday. I'll give my daughter some pearls of wisdom too, but my wife will probably have more and better advice for her than I.

[happyharry]

Yeah, being a father at such a young age must be tough. I can't imagine how it must be
like to be taking care of one's family. Heck, I sometimes find it hard taking care of myself. So
it must be quite the challenge.


Ah, I realise there have been quite a few people who read my post, but most of them just...read it. Didn't post any replies. I should have mentioned in the title "Caution: Serious Subject Here...".

It is a serious subject. Some people might feel uncomfortable, thinking they haven't made the grade themselves yet. Others may think it's a somewhat heavy topic for a relaxed Friday evening in front of the computer. It is a complex subject, it can go deep.

But come on folks, don't be shy. There's things we could learn from each other. So go ahead and share your views, experiences and sentiments on that subject. I think some of us (me, for instance) could benefit from it...

[Tyler]

Hmmm, what does it mean to enter Manhood?  That's a tough question.

I guess most guys enter it without even knowing it.  Does a specific event (moving out, getting married, having a child, etc) cause you to enter manhood?  Or is it a cognitive decision where a boy decides he needs to mature and become a man?

I really think it's a combination of both.  I think that there are events in life that trigger a reaction in a "boy" to start the process of becoming a man.  I don't think becoming a man happens overnight.  I also think that men can revert back to being boyish at times.  Take having a mid-life crisis for example.  I think being a man means building the character to "be" a man, so the times when you don't want to be a man, you dig down deep and be one anyways.

Part of being a man is accepting the responsibilities in life that you have or that will come.  Once you realize that, you start becoming a man.

Am I right on?  Way off?  What do you guys, eh, I mean MEN, think?

[PBurke]

i feel like being a man can cover such a wide ariety of areas that it can't be explained. every one of us has his own meaning to what being a man is. as for myself, wow, ....... I feel like taking care of my family and getting my big lazy butt out of bed is one part of it. just a few minutes ago i was christmas shopping online with my 5 yr. old. let me tell you that takes a man to do that. what i mean is that a boy would have run down the street screaming like a banshee. I understand everyday why some animals eat their young at birth, it is easier. don't get the wrong idea guys, i would never wish harm on a child. but having 2 teens and one 5 yr old in the house is very trying. if that don't make a man out of someone, then call me a boy.