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#15 by David on 05 Dec, 2007 00:09
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very little, unless it changes your inner confidence.
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#16 by yep_yep on 05 Dec, 2007 02:45
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Boss, it's really going to depend on your attitude about it. If you go it with the attitude that you rock the look, then you're lifestyle is going to be much better than it was before. Though, if you go in with the attitude that you're a "victim" of bad genes, then you're lifestyle is going to degrade. It's really up to you bro.
It's not that simple. You guys often tend to forget that the shaved look really really does not suit everyone.
I think you're missing the point, Y-Y. The whole idea is how you feel about yourself. If you approach your hair loss with a "woah is me" attitude, then it really doesn't matter if you go sly or not. Although I was comfortable with my hair loss (though not happy about it), the fact that I shaved my head made me feel better about myself. Plus, I finally found relief from the scalp condition that had afflicted me for years.
Lastly, how you are percieved by others is directly related to how you percieve yourself. I'll never forget a guy I knew in college. He was not wealthy, average looking at best, fairly short, and slightly overweight. But, he had one of the hottest, nicest girls as a girlfriend. His secret.....he was a lot of fun to be around! Not a jokester (though he had a great sense of humor), but just a genuinely good guy. Treated everyone with respect.
How you see yourself is how others view you.
Nah, it's not like that. I think I'm an okish looking guy, but my odd headshape and balding almost completely ruins it for me. What I do know is by looking at some older pictures, I looked a helluva lot better with longer hair. Of course if you're gonna go and compare the bald horseshoe look with the shaved look, the shaved look wins hands down. I'll give you that.
RazorX, I can assure you that my life was much better when I didn't have this early balding to deal with. It's bound to wear one down if you don't like what you see in the mirror. Yes, deep down it's all about attitude but there's so much more to it. It's hard to have a good attitude when I have had so much genetic bullcrap dealt at me and I'm only 25. Wonder what's next, eyesight problems like my mum or developing a severe rheumatism like my father? My point is that for some people the early hairloss can really be the final nail in the coffin. -
#17 by Iceman on 05 Dec, 2007 03:11
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I really liked razor's comment about the subject matter. I'm pretty new to the way of the sly, but i find no regrets after shaving. (other than the elements!) I kinda viewed my going sly as more of an awakening to stop covering crap up, and face reality. Alot of other things can follow if you view it in a positive way.
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#18 by R o b 6 on 05 Dec, 2007 07:07
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Yes, deep down it's all about attitude but there's so much more to it. It's hard to have a good attitude when I have had so much genetic bullcrap dealt at me and I'm only 25. Wonder what's next, eyesight problems like my mum or developing a severe rheumatism like my father? My point is that for some people the early hairloss can really be the final nail in the coffin.
I'm not trying to minimize how it can affect someone, especially in their 20s.
But I guess it's all where you're coming from...personally, I can't fathom how inheriting a receding hairline or balding is a final nail in the coffin. Sure, it can mindscrew your self-esteem and do a number on your confidence.
But I can think of a whole host of "genetic bullcrap" dealt to people that would qualify. Inheriting a progressively debilitating disease. Finding out you have a genetic marker for certain type of cancer. A child with a severe developmental disability.
I can only imagine how anyone whose been "dealt" something like this would "trade up" to the impact of a bald or balding head of hair..and it wouldn't even register on a scale of 1-10.
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#19 by Razor X on 05 Dec, 2007 07:11
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RazorX, I can assure you that my life was much better when I didn't have this early balding to deal with. It's bound to wear one down if you don't like what you see in the mirror. Yes, deep down it's all about attitude but there's so much more to it. It's hard to have a good attitude when I have had so much genetic bullcrap dealt at me and I'm only 25. Wonder what's next, eyesight problems like my mum or developing a severe rheumatism like my father? My point is that for some people the early hairloss can really be the final nail in the coffin.
It's only the final nail in the coffin if you let it be. Do you seriously think your life is over? I assure you it is not. God willing you have an entire lifetime ahead of you yet. Don't ruin it by lamenting about your hair loss. There's nothing you can do about it anyway. Accept what you cannot change and move on. Once you do, you will feel a whole lot better.
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#20 by D.A.L.U.I. on 05 Dec, 2007 08:41
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Yep_Yep, Razor and Tyler have told you the truth. But if your self perception is as you state, you need to talk this one out w/ a professional because your problem isn't hair, it's much more serious and you shouldn't try to ignore the fact that you have a serious issue and please don't try to solve it your own. You need some professional guidance and there's no shame or problem seeking it out. Please look for some help. I know all the guys here want to support you, and it will get better, it's just that, for you, it's not a hair issue. Work on that if you need to after you've talked this through w/ a professional.
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#21 by RodgerDodger on 05 Dec, 2007 09:07
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It's only the final nail in the coffin if you let it be. Do you seriously think your life is over? I assure you it is not. God willing you have an entire lifetime ahead of you yet. Don't ruin it by lamenting about your hair loss. There's nothing you can do about it anyway. Accept what you cannot change and move on. Once you do, you will feel a whole lot better.
yep yep,
I recommend you listen to razor x's advice.
And it's not just because he's a fellow "Jersey Boy"!
You are very lucky to have found this place. So just be open-minded and listen carefully.
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#22 by warhawk on 05 Dec, 2007 09:48
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yep.yep.....i totally agree with razor "it's only the final nail in the coffin if you let it be". that is one very strong and powerful statement. i can't say it any better. u have 2 embrace it and not be in denial. if u don't embrace it....then it will take over u in a negative way....u will start being depressed, insecure, unsure, & miserable.
WARHAWK
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#23 by ugabulldog on 05 Dec, 2007 11:33
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yep-yep..... you have received many words of wisdom that I wish I knew at your age. Many members have given you sound advice, razor, rob, and myself in another post. If you still feel the way you do then I think saint is right and you need to seek professional help elsewhere as your problem is much deeper than loss of hair. I am not trying to be mean, just my 2 cents, I am not a doctor or anything close, I just know that ALL of us have issues to deal with, and you are not alone.
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#24 by Marz on 05 Dec, 2007 12:16
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hmmm...
Wiggle your fingers and wiggle your toes.
Now see, you are already better of than many.
Everyone has problems, be thankful that your are not worse. -
#25 by Razor X on 05 Dec, 2007 15:35
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hmmm...
Wiggle your fingers and wiggle your toes.
Now see, you are already better of than many.
Everyone has problems, be thankful that your are not worse.
Exactly. Anyone can expend this much energy being upset about hair loss is lucky because he must not have any real problems. I'm not saying that hair loss is something you have to like, but it is something you have to learn to live with.
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#26 by D.A.L.U.I. on 05 Dec, 2007 15:45
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Yep_Yep, I didn't mean to be mean or anything like that. It's just that you seem to be really into something that is more than hair and you aren't able to see that on your own. It's not uncommon to do that, especially when you're as young as you are. You've got a lot going on in your life and except for this you've got the world by the tail. Please, give yourself a break, everyone else is and will--it's just hard for you to see that right now but you will, you really will.
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#27 by yep_yep on 05 Dec, 2007 16:23
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hmmm...
Wiggle your fingers and wiggle your toes.
Now see, you are already better of than many.
Everyone has problems, be thankful that your are not worse.
Yeah, thanks to all you guys for support. Anyway, that wiggle your fingers and toes part made me laugh since I only got 9 fingers. That's right, I only got 4 fingers on my right hand. I was born with all 10 but my right thumb just wouldn't develop and it had to be surgered off when I was 4. Now I have my original index finger as thumb. Just one part of the "genetic bullcrap" I was referring to earlier.
Saintc, you were totally right. My problems lie way beneath hairloss. I'm not thinking about suicide or anything like that but sometimes I feel very hopeless. -
#28 by Marz on 05 Dec, 2007 16:32
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hmmm...
Wiggle your fingers and wiggle your toes.
Now see, you are already better of than many.
Everyone has problems, be thankful that your are not worse.
Yeah, thanks to all you guys for support. Anyway, that wiggle your fingers and toes part made me laugh since I only got 9 fingers. That's right, I only got 4 fingers on my right hand. I was born with all 10 but my right thumb just wouldn't develop and it had to be surgered off when I was 4. Now I have my original index finger as thumb. Just one part of the "genetic bullcrap" I was referring to earlier.
Saintc, you were totally right. My problems lie way beneath hairloss. I'm not thinking about suicide or anything like that but sometimes I feel very hopeless.
Oh great, my foot is in my mouth... I apologize.
I did not mean anything by that other than whatever your problems may be and how unsurmountable they appear at times things can always get worse.
I have been through the balding at a young age too and I completely understand the pain it can cause. -
#29 by jmcmana on 05 Dec, 2007 21:44
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These posts have all been pretty good, and I think they are right, it's not so much of a lifestyle change as it is really just an appearance change. However, for the sake of giving you an answer, I'll say it's had a huge impact on me. It hasn't made me more or less qualified for jobs, made me a better hockey player, or put more money in my pocket. It doesn't have those kinds of affects. However, I'm not nervous to walk in front of people anymore, I'm not worried about opening my sunroof and messing my hair up or the little glares that would come sporatically across my head, and when I get out of the pool, I carry my towel and show off my head rather than cover my head up. I gave my first speech since shaving my head in class the other day, and where I used to worry about standing under the light and people noticing what wasnt' there, I now care about making sure my zipper is zipped. I don't really know if this was the type of answer you were looking for, I just wanted to give you a little insight on what it's done for me. I've always been a naturally confident person, shaving my head eliminated my last worry, I feel untouchable now...