I Can't Believe It

[don]

If you remember I told you I have a friend who kept pushing me to get hair transplants because he got them.I made it clear to him numerous times that I don't want to go that extreme.I'm frightened of surgery and that's too drastic.Bad enough people hate to have surgery for health reasons so I can't imagine anybody having elective surgery.

Well he called the other night after 2 months and asked how I was doing and after a few minutes he says that he hates to bring up old speeches but he saw a commercial for Bosley and the man had less hair than me and he received a successful transplant and that I should think about it, so annoyingly I told him that I look fine the way I am and surgery is too extreme and then I told him that it's your facial features that determine your looks,not your hair.I said that if a person is good looking they will look good with or without hair and that if a person is ugly they will be ugly with or without hair and after I said that he laughed.

Also since I knew he had transplants I told him that it will not stop any future hair loss just to rattle him. I can't believe he actually brought that subject up again.I really think that there's something mentally wrong with him.I don't know any other way to explain it. Believe me,I wish there was a way I could've sent an electrical jolt through the phone and knocked him right off his ass. Does he actually think I look substandard this way that he thinks I should have this done! Everyone else says I look good this way.This a$$hole is really getting to me now.I never call him but he calls me.He called me 1.00 in the morning to boot.He's lucky I was still up.What the hell is the matter with him.Any ideas?

[TheSlyBear]

He obviously has a need to justify his own poor decision by coercing you to join him in it.

Good thing you're too smart for that.

Get caller ID.

[warhawk]

don.....yes i remember your post regarding your so called "friend".  sounds like he isn't your friend.  if he was a friend he would accept your decision & not "bully" u into getting a hairtransplant.  like bootedbear mentioned...get caller id & try 2 avoid this person because he obviously doesn't respect your views.

WARHAWK

[Tyler]

He obviously has a need to justify his own poor decision by coercing you to join him in it.

Good thing you're too smart for that.

Get caller ID.

I completely agree with Bootedbear.

[shyslyguy]

He called you at 1am to tell you you should get a hair transplant? !!!

That does sound pretty weird Don - was he drunk or something?

Anyway, you're right about the transplant - it wont stop the hair loss at all.

I think caller ID is probably the answer. 

[Paul]

Don, bootedbear hit it right on the head.  He is just one of those guys who nails everyone else because of his own insecurities and the fact he feels bad about himself.  You need to just keep hanging here and get the support from secure, confident guys who have taken charge of their own lives.

[BaldRob]

Way to stand your ground Don!

[SLYinKC]

Don, sounds like you handled it pretty well.  As long as you stand your ground and he sees your confidence, I think that will speak louder than any words and he will see the futility of what he has done.  He's just hounding you to reinforce his faltering ego.  Just my 2 cents.

[PBurke]

do we need to send someone to his house to shave him? good job don on standing your ground. hell with him.

[Robmeister]

....I really think that there's something mentally wrong with him....What the hell is the matter with him.Any ideas?

You may be on to something there, don.  He may very well be a clinical narcissist, believe it or not .   

I had a business associate who belittled others and constantly extoled HIS way of thinking and doing things.  He picked on ME particularly (since I worked with him more closely)....comparing his ways to my "substandard" way of doing things. 

The last straw with this guy was when he--3 weeks after a business trip we were on--gave me an accounting of every drink I had imbibed the night we were in San Diego (2 beers, 3 glasses of wine with dinner, 4 martinis while playing pool, etc...), Extoling HIS OWN wonderful virtues of temperance and chiding me on how irresponsible I was when we had a seminar the next morning.

Anyway I stopped doing business with this clown and several months later another associate calls me and tells me that [so and so] was recently officially diagnosed as a narcissist (Narcissist Personality Disorder [NPD]). 

When we looked up various articles online about NPD.....A WHOLE BUNCH about the way this guy operated MADE SENSE.

Here's a hilarious clincher......he's now writing a book on Narcissism.....ALL ABOUT HIMSELF!!!

Anyway....here's a couple links...you can google more if you like.   See if anything rings true about your narcissist. 

Shoot, you may be able to turn the tables on him by announcing that, sadly, he may need to see a therapist

http://www.soulselfhelp.on.ca/compassionnarc.html

http://samvak.tripod.com/faq82.html

[Timmay]

MY wife said I am too obsessed with shaving my head.  Any time a hairloss commerical comes on i get in front of the screen and start hollering at the guys.  I just keep saying over and over..your wasting your money...invest your money into shaving supplies you idiots.  You are all too overly obsessed with your hair.  If you are losing your hair..your losing it...get over it.  Quit tryin to be someone  you are not.  Hair is hair...Hair today gone Tomorrow.  ITS NOT GOING TO COME BACK ON ITS OWN.  Spending on personal items to make ourselves look better has topped the $10billion mark.  what are people thinking ..especially the guys. 
OHHHHHHHHHHH Dont get me started.  Its just different for a woman..but guys come on......before long you will all be parading around in red and white striped shorts , with a big a sign on your back side...saying..KISS MY ASS...this is me! LOL

OK i admit....what the hell was I tryin to convey there..hell i dunno..you all the ones who accepted me in here...now ya stuck with me

[Sooner Steve]

Don, the old saying goes like this:  "Misery loves company."

Your "friend" is miserable and he wants company i.e. you to make the same bad decision that you did.

Doesn't say much for his friendship or his decisions.

I agree with everyone else - you made the right decision.

[nomad]

He might be trying for the 2 for 1 discount?

[don]

Nomad,it's funny that you said that because he did say recently that he might consider getting a few more treatments,so maybe they do give him a 2 for 1 discount if he supplies them with a new customer, that sneaky rats ass.

[champ007]

Remember misery loves company Don. I agree with the guys that somethings not right.
He must be from up North... A northern friend will bail you out of Jail at 3AM... A southern friend will be sitting next to you in the cell saying "That was f'in awesome man"! 
Just messin with my northern bro's a little!!