The Pillsbury Doughboy died yesterday of a yeast infection and trauma complications from repeated pokes in the belly. He was 71.
Please join me in remembering a great icon of the entertainment community.
Doughboy was buried in a lightly greased coffin. Dozens of celebrities turned out to pay their respects, including Mrs. Butterworth, Hungry Jack, The California Raisins, Betty Crocker, the Hostess Twinkies, and Captain Crunch. The grave site was piled high with flours.
Aunt Jemima delivered the eulogy and lovingly described him as a man who never knew how much he was kneaded. Doughboy rose quickly in show business, but his later life was filled with turnovers.
He was not considered a very smart cookie, wasting much of his dough on half-baked schemes. Despite being a little flaky at times and a crusty old man he was still considered a positive roll model for millions.
He is survived by his wife Play Dough, two children, John Dough and Jane Dough, plus they had one in the oven. He is also survived by his elderly father, Pop Tart.
The funeral was held at 3:50 for about 20 minutes.
