How Can I Convince my Boyfriend to Shave? - page 1 -

• How Can I Convince my Boyfriend to Shave? by JayneDough on 22 Sep, 2018 09:35
• My boyfriend has been thinning ever since I met him. The problem is, he's too scared to let go of his hair. I think he's self conscious or embarrassed since I've never seen him with it really short. I used to be a bit nervous to bring up the topic because I know it can be a touchy subject, but at this point I really just want him to cut it off. I've told him to get a haircut and even offered to do it for him, but he says no. I thought maybe he never wanted to do it because he wasn't sure how I'd feel about it, but now I've offered and he still doesn't want to. What do I do? I don't want to say anything to hurt his feelings, but I also think he would just look better without the hair at this point. He got so upset last time when I tried to cut it, that now I'm too nervous to even bring it up again.
• #1 by reddog on 22 Sep, 2018 14:23
• Let it go, it's his decision.
• #2 by scooby on 22 Sep, 2018 14:51
• have him look at some pictures and read some of the stories on this website,that might help him,if it doesnt then hes not ready and you should let it go until hes ready.
• #3 by JayneDough on 22 Sep, 2018 16:47
• I'm definitely not trying to give him an ultimatum or even saying it all has to go. But it really bugs me, even if he could take it really short that would be an improvement. And I know it's not easy for guys, but I just thought hearing it from me might give him a little boost to go through with it. And I never try to force him to do it, I just try to bring it up politely to make him think about it, I never even mention the baldness. I simply say his hair is getting a little long and he could use a haircut. Wouldn't you guys let your significant other know if there was something they should do to improve themselves even if it is a touchy subject? Am I being mean? I do like the idea of him reading up about it on this site, but I don't know if he's in denial of going bald.
• #4 by Sciguy68 on 22 Sep, 2018 18:20
• I had a head full of hair and then my widow's peak got higher and higher so I decided to buzz it all off with a #2 guard, then I went to a #1 guard. After a few months, I had my head shaved without a guard and then I went home and shaved it all.off. I haven't looked back since, it's been 3 years.  I shave every day, love the smooth feeling and I get lots of compliments on how I look younger with a bald head since my head full of hair was very gray. He could always try it, it will grow back if he doesn't like the look or feel of a bald head.
• #5 by Magoo on 22 Sep, 2018 18:25
• You can suggest he give shaving a try . But don’t push the issue, it might not be something he’s willing  to try.
• #6 by JayneDough on 22 Sep, 2018 20:09
• Then, I guess I'll suggest it one more time and if he says no I'll hint at it once in a while. I wish he would try it at least once and if he didn't like it I'd drop it. But I think once he makes the change he'll wish he had done it sooner. I just have to help him get there and see that it's no big deal. After all, he has no one to impress but me lol
• #7 by nuts on 22 Sep, 2018 21:07
• Don't push it.  You might think it is only you but he is probably concerned about friends, workmates etc and how they might react.  Softly, softly and he will probably come round.
• #8 by JayneDough on 22 Sep, 2018 21:51
• Yes, this is a concern of mine, probably the biggest reason I would like for him to go through with it. I have seen and heard people sort of pick on him for it, I know they are guys and think it's a bit of banter, but no way does he find it funny. I know it'll be a big confidence booster. Like I said, I would prefer it gone, but I know better than to be pushy about it. I would just like to hint at it subtly and help him feel like it's not something to be afraid of. Heck, I'd cut all my hair off if it made him feel better.
• #9 by Blagadan on 23 Sep, 2018 04:32
• Perhaps casually drop it in while playing with his hair 'honey have you ever thought about shaving your hair. I think you'd look hot, like Bruce Willis'
  
  It's his decision alone. He likely has fears so work to allay those fears by saying how hot he'd look, how he has a nice shaped head, how it would suit his face etc. But don't push or bring it up again if he says no. Let him come around.
• #10 by professor on 23 Sep, 2018 06:39
•  If you were married you could probably get away with a strong suggestion, since you are only dating tread lightly.  It is a sensitive subject to him and he is most likely becoming more self conscious every time you mention it.  It would be different if he mentioned it to you and asked for your opinion..
• #11 by Laser Man on 23 Sep, 2018 13:31
• Trying to change each other is a very sensitive aspect of a relationship - even in a long-term relationship, and seeking a change that can radically alter a person's appearance is particularly sensitive.  If your boyfriend is getting a lot of jokes about losing his hair from his friends, he's probably hypersensitive about the topic, as evidenced by the fact that he won't even discuss it when you bring it up. Chances are if you keep pushing the subject, he's going to become upset with you because he's simply not ready to even consider a short haircut, let alone a fully shaved head.
  
  My advice: casually mention that you like short hair and shaved heads occasionally, but don't do it to often or forcefully. If you see bald actors, point out that you think they look good.  Give him time and he may come around.
  
  Good luck!
• #12 by JayneDough on 23 Sep, 2018 23:55
• Thank you for all the great advice and suggestions, feel free to post or PM me, more thoughts are always welcome. I have yet to bring it up, not sure how soon I will. It's been almost 2 months since I have mentioned it to him, so maybe I'll wait a little longer before bringing up the topic again.
• #13 by StillLurking on 26 Sep, 2018 14:53
• If I'm not to late to comment, I'd like to put on my "Dear Abby" hat and offer an opinion:  You ask "Wouldn't you guys let your significant other know if there was something they should do to improve themselves...?"  But "improvement" is very subjective.  Some ladies may find the balding look more attractive than a full head of hair or a bald head.  Shaving your head isn't a right or wrong issue; it's cosmetic.  It's a preference issue.
  
  I've noticed a lot of ladies date someone who they genuinely like, except for one are more "small issues."  So the ladies try to "fix" their boyfriend rather than leave him.  After all, he's a great guy except for (whatever).  Perhaps a better solution is to leave him free to find a lady who accepts him as is, and let yourself free to find someone you can accept as is.  Embrace him as he is and let the issue go, or let him go. 
  
  And no, it is not necessarily superficial or mean to let this be a factor in deciding the future of your relationship.  It's easy to sound grand and preach "a decent person looks beyond the physical..." but come on.  Hearts don't really work that way and you KNOW what does and doesn't ignite that flame for you.  You get to choose whom you date and you have the right to set whatever preferences you chose.  Your heart, your choice.
• #14 by JayneDough on 26 Sep, 2018 15:50
• Ermm... not so sure I'd want to break up with him over something so silly...? We haven't been together for only a few weeks, it's been a couple years. Which I know may not be very long, but I wouldn't want to end a relationship over that, of all things.