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Still want an earring
by
okiebald
on 29 Mar, 2016 18:51
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So I've been "lurking" with even a comment or two in the past on the piercing posts. I've wanted an earring for a long time but haven't done it so far. My wife is not on board with the whole idea- I even broached the subject last summer in a joking way. She let me know in no uncertain terms that was not a good idea. We have a great relationship- 32 years married- and with two grown children. BTW, I'm 62, fully retired and active in church. I'm very conventional in every other way except for my desire to have a piercing in my left ear. So I guess my question, if I have one, is- is there a way to get a piercing and have it just about invisible for the healing period? I've read on other forums of some kind of retainers that are almost invisible. Also, any advice to bring my wife around? I love her more than life itself and would not want to hurt her, but this desire (obsession?) just won't go away.
Thanks for any suggestions you have.
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#1
by
Sir Harry
on 29 Mar, 2016 21:11
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Welcome back, Okie
I realize that (at least according to your previous posts) that you are very active in your church, and that's a good thing. However, your wife's concern may be the reaction of others but I would just have a talk with her and see why. That said, some fantasies in life sometimes may have to stay just that- fantasies. You may unfortunately have to give up your dream of an earring if it causes too much of an issue with your wife.
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#2
by
AJ Q-Ball
on 29 Mar, 2016 21:26
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I'm sorry to hear about your situation. I'm wanting and plan to get both of my ears pierced when I get out for summer break. I've been wanting some silver hoops to go along with the bald and bearded look.
The way I look at it with your wife is that it's not fair to you. I'm sure she has freedom to do what she wants with her hair for example and doesn't have to ask your permission. I feel like you should have freedom to get something as little as an earring. That's just coming from a single man FWIW.
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#3
by
mrzed
on 30 Mar, 2016 08:39
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I'm almost 63. Got my left ear pierced about 3 years ago. Your bio seems similar to mine. I'll PM with some suggestions which may help.
I did not get too much push back from my wife. Our girls thought it was great.
At church, there may be one or two other guys with an earring, so I'm not mainstream in that area, but I've not received negative push back.
To answer your specific question about healing ... Generally you need to leave the original piece of jewelry in place for 2 months for healing. After that, there are some spacers which you can use to hold the piercing open, but look almost invisible. You could try that. These are usually non-metal pieces. More prone to infections, so not recommended during healing.
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#4
by
mrzed
on 30 Mar, 2016 09:40
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#5
by
okiebald
on 30 Mar, 2016 09:50
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Thanks, guys. I appreciate the support and advice. Please continue to comment as I've committed myself to eventually getting the ear pierced. Also, if anyone has had resistance from wives or loved ones, please reply.
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#6
by
Semi-Sly
on 30 Mar, 2016 23:53
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Well I am 61 and got my ears pierced about a year ago. First the left ear and about 6 months later the right ear.
Today I got a second piercing in the left ear. I really like the way this looks and will probably stop with these three.
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#7
by
paperclip
on 31 Mar, 2016 12:14
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I have had resistance from my wife with regards to my earrings.
when I met my wife about 20 years ago I had pierced my left ear but didn't wear anything in it at the time due to religious reasons. so she knew I had a pierced ear but didn't really say anything about it.
When I turned 40, I got the urge to wear the earring again and started wearing one in my left ear. she didn't really comment but when I pierced my right ear, she freaked on me, said I looked "gay". I was very upset so I took out both earrings and put them away.
When I turned 50 last year, I started wearing an earring in my left ear again then took the bold step and pierced my right again. It was more common for guys to wear earrings in both ears now and I wanted to be part of the trend.
I hid the new piercing from my wife for about a week and waited until she was in a good mood and started wearing them in her presence. she didn't really say anything this time just "oh you wear two earrings?". she didn't freak out
Recently her friend (an older woman at church) commented on my earrings at church asking me why did I wear them. My wife said to her friend, "I don't like them, but I probably do things he doesn't like"
so I just wear them and she doesn't comment (so far)
Maybe you could try getting the earring and she might just get used to you with it. someone mentioned earlier that it isn't fair that you can't do what you want to do in this regard. As long as you aren't hurting anyone, why can't you have the freedom to express yourself?
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#8
by
Paul
on 02 Apr, 2016 12:40
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I'm 64 Okie and had both ears pierced for years. I have only had positive from my lady and absolutely no issues from either friends at church or at the school where I teach. If it is that important to you can always do it, blame it on male menopause and tell you wife at least you didn't buy a red jaguar!
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#9
by
mrzed
on 05 May, 2016 20:09
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Just slipped a 10 gauge cbr in place of my 12 gauge cbr which has been in place since the fall. No pain. No struggle to get it in. It just slipped into place. I'll probably stop at this size.
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#10
by
Semi-Sly
on 05 May, 2016 23:29
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I'm 64 Okie and had both ears pierced for years. I have only had positive from my lady and absolutely no issues from either friends at church or at the school where I teach. If it is that important to you can always do it, blame it on male menopause and tell you wife at least you didn't buy a red jaguar!
Oh no - don't stop with just the earring. As long as you are blaming it on mid-life menopause go for the red Jaguar too!
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#11
by
zetaeffe
on 06 May, 2016 10:20
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Just slipped a 10 gauge cbr in place of my 12 gauge cbr which has been in place since the fall. No pain. No struggle to get it in. It just slipped into place. I'll probably stop at this size.
Keep going!!
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#12
by
mrzed
on 06 May, 2016 11:11
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Lol. Noo. 10 gauge is enough. I still want the option to wear some studs for more formal occasions.
But I do really like this 10 gauge. Nice weight.
Dan
Sent from my XT1028 using Tapatalk
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#13
by
slybeard
on 06 May, 2016 12:51
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Question for you guys with the big ones: Does it fee like someone is constantly tugging at you ear?
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#14
by
mrzed
on 06 May, 2016 19:27
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Not at 10 gauge. I can feel it if I turn my head quickly, but not otherwise. It feels like just the right size.