Advice / general concensus

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Advice / general concensus by Bilko1 on 22 Dec, 2014 17:32
My son has recently met a new girlfriend - they have been dating just over six weeks & seem very much in love.

My son told me that his girlfriend's best friend was a trainee beautician and hairdresser (about 2 years experience) and had shaved her boyfriends head about 4 months ago as he wanted to raise money for charity. My son has met him and the guy is getting his head shaved again in January, but not for charity this time - simply because his girlfriend wants him to and wants him to be her model for practicing on. My son's girlfriend has asked my son to volunteer and to have his head shaved also, but he is a bit aprehensive about it as he has never really had too short hair, let alone a shaved head. He said that he would possibly have his head shaved for charity, but his girlfriend is insisting that he should just have his head shaved & not worry about it as she thinks he would really suit it. His thoughts are that it would be a bit drastic as he has fairly thick, long hair ( just below collar length) and he is also not sure what his work colleagues / management would say. I have said that it is his own decision & that he shouldn't worry about what his work colleagues / manager would say as there is nothing in his works staff regulations to say that he cannot have short hair or a shaved head. He is wondering what others would say on this matter. Looking forward to any comments.
#1 by tobler1 on 22 Dec, 2014 17:39
Honestly, I think that is a bit presumptuous for the friend to ask her friend's boyfriend to do something like that. I mean, if your son really wants an excuse to shave his head, nothing wrong with it, but that's just not something I would ask someone to do. My two cents.
#2 by AJ Q-Ball on 22 Dec, 2014 18:03
Yeah your son should not be pressured at all into something like this. Like tobler said, if your son wants to have it done, then fine. Otherwise your son should be left alone and have his wishes respected.
#3 by Cave Dweller on 22 Dec, 2014 18:56
I am with Tobler and AJ. If your son wants to shave, but is hesitant because it will be a drastic change in his appearance, he is in good company with those of us who felt that same anxiety. From what you wrote, however, it does not sound as if this is his idea or what he really wants to do.

#4 by Mike E. P. on 22 Dec, 2014 20:03
Why is she pressuring him? That does not bode well. I'd get out of that situation now.
#5 by DOC_OSMC on 22 Dec, 2014 20:08
I am in agreement with all the gentlemen before me. This is a decision that he alone should make and one that he shouldn't be pressured into. She can suggest it, nothing wrong with that, but if he chooses not to, then his decision needs to be respected.
#6 by TheHeadShaver on 22 Dec, 2014 20:30
I heard "she asked him" and "he is apprehensive". However, I never heard anything along the lines of, "he's been contemplating doing it for awhile" or "he's mentioned doing it before" or "he's shaved it once before" etc. In other words, I'm not hearing that this is something he has even thought about. Let alone doing it at the request of a friend of a girlfriend. Honestly, I could not in good conscience support him shaving his head for the reasons presented.
#7 by Sir Harry on 23 Dec, 2014 04:05
Personally, half the time I don't care to do half the things my girlfriend asks me to do....let alone a friend of a friend/someone else's girlfriend, etc.....This sounds somewhat fishy like the girlfriend and her friend trying to do something backwoods here...just my 0.02
#8 by Laser Man on 23 Dec, 2014 08:46
I agree with the others - this story doesn't sound good. If after six weeks she's pressuring him to make a significant change in his appearance, one that from the sound of it, he's reluctant to make, it doesn't bode well.
#9 by Hingatao on 23 Dec, 2014 09:55
Here's another vote for not doing it. Peer pressure is the wrong reason to do anything. He might want to think about re-evaluating a friendship or two.
#10 by slybeard on 23 Dec, 2014 11:52
Doesn't sound like a good relationship to me, if she is successful in pressuring him to shave when he doesn't want to, what will be the next demand? Where will it stop? Could be trouble ahead.
#11 by Bilko1 on 23 Dec, 2014 16:05
Thanks guy's for all your kind concern and advice. It is mostly what I have said to my son already......that shaving his head should be his own decision & not one that is, for want of a better word, forced upon him. If he wants to do it for a good cause then fair enough, but this should still be his choice.

I am waiting to see what he does come January...... I will keep you guys posted and by the way, have a wonderful Christmas / Hannukah season.