feel like I lost some of my "identity" as a bald guy.

[4fit]

I have just turned 50 (Monday) and never thought of going bald at your age. Wish i had!

So much info these days and i feel so much better now that when i had hair!!!! I am still as ugly though! lol

from the looks of the new avatar I think we would all agree that the still ugly remarks can safely be put in a box on the top shelf all the way in the back of the closet LOCKED!

[Goatee]

I have just turned 50 (Monday) and never thought of going bald at your age. Wish i had!

So much info these days and i feel so much better now that when i had hair!!!! I am still as ugly though! lol

from the looks of the new avatar I think we would all agree that the still ugly remarks can safely be put in a box on the top shelf all the way in the back of the closet LOCKED!

I agree, i am as ugly as sin!

[Goatee]

Speaking of what people think, Mr Goatee, great looking new photo.

Cheers!

[samljer]

I had great hair, and now I'm 22 and bald and bearded. I feel like I look kinda similar when I'm bearded and bald, but when I'm completely bald my self confidence goes all the way down. I see so many people who are in their 40's' and 50's and still have a full head of hair and it makes me sick that at my age I'm already incapable of growing hair on top of my head.

I felt exactly as you did, when I had hair; Its probably something inside yourself worried
about projection onto others. "The whole feeling like self thing"

If it helps, people dont just assume you were balding so you shaved your head, in fact
most people just see a "guy", noticing youre bald doesnt happen right away.
Even then, most just assume you shaved it because its "sexy", as ive been told.
Nobody ever thought that it was because I lost my hair on top anyway!
Most dont believe it unless i let a few days of growth, crown my head for proof haha.
That is unless they knew you for awhile, in which case they will get used to it; always do.

[DoberDaddy]

You are learning the lessons of life early, that's all.

Last February, I lost my partner of almost 12 years, suddenly, traumatically, without warning. Puts EVERYTHING into perspective.

I WAS partnered, now I am not.

Did not expect to celebrate my 50th, this past April, as a widower.

We had vacation plans, retirement plans... you name it.

"der mensch tracht und gott lacht" Man plans, and god laughs!

So your identity was wrapped up in your hair. Now you are bald and bearded.

So what?

Get over it!

Seriously... far more things to worry about than that.

Sorry if I sound uncaring... but... it's hair.

[greatnessinc]

Perspective, young one perspective.
Maybe you're finding out who you really are?

[buddha]

Yes, but, most people do care about what others think of them. It is only human to do so. It is hard for most to pull the shutters down on what others think of them. This is the world that we live in i am afraid.

When you attribute this to "being human" I'm afraid I must beg to differ. Ima splain why.
 
This need for approval is a societal thing, nature vs. nurture. It is the way we are brought up, not hard wiring. We are taught by our parents and other authority figures to rely on the approval of others as evidence that we are good human beings. If we're talking about behaviors then I would agree that, to an extent, we can use the opinions of others as to our behavior as a yardstick to measure whether we are good neighbors/friends/citizens. We can control and even alter our behavior with regard to how we interact with our fellow humans.

With regard to that which I cannot control it is a pure waste of time to allow the opinions of others to affect me even slightly. So I'm bald and the guy three cubicles over doesn't like it. That causes no disruption of MY sleep patterns. Maybe he doesn't like tall people either. I'm 6'-4" tall. Is it possible for me to accommodate his opinion by shrinking? Do I even care?

With regard to behaviors, if my behavior is characteristically out of line and I don't consider the upset that I cause others as a result that would tend to make me a dangerous borderline psychopath. So if that is what you were referring to in the quoted statement I agree.

But since we are talking about balding, which is uncontrollable, and the remedies normally spoken of in here (which injure no one) then I say to hell with anyone else's opinion of me and my shiny dome.

[geddyflea]

Hang with it - it will become more natural as time goes by.  I've been at it for almost a year now and when I see pictures of myself with hair, and how it receded so far up to the top of my head, along with the beginnings of the "monk" in the back....it feels more natural now more than ever.