The never ending story....maybe

[Razor X]

"Never!!"  So I threw down the golf clubs and pulled out my pocket watch and began to hypnotize him into forgetting that he'd been held hostage, and into hating the sly look forever.  I made him think that if he ever touched a razor again, it would burn like molten lava in his hand.  He was destined to live his life as one hairy dude.

Then I slipped out the back window to avoid the police and then I ....

[SLYinKC]

never, I would rather die than loose my SLY coolness.  Well then I said you leave me no other choice but to

[Razor X]

pinch myself and realize that I'd already done this part.  Standing there in the back yard, after climbing out the window, I ....

[PBurke]

walked to the store and bought some ben and jerry's cherry garcia. and headed to the park to..............

[SLYinKC]

eat my ice cream an ponder my future plans.  However on my way to the park I ran straight into..

[Razor X]

... that chick with the perfume samples from the store.  She'd instantly gained 25 pounds from the candy bars I'd forced her to eat, and she was hell-bent on revenge.  Not knowing what else to do, I threw my pint of ice cream at her, hitting her square between the eyes.  She picked it up and began to eat it.  It was then that I finally remembered that  I could fly, so catapulted myself into the air and ....

[JDog]

straight into a low lying tree branch. This knocked me unconsious for a few minutes. When I came to, the fat slag was still eating the ice cream I had thrown at her and I was bleeding heavily from a gash in my perfectly slick smooth dome. I warily got to me feet and turned around only to see..

[Razor X]

a tribe of Amazons who quickly overpowered me and carried me off to their remote island to be their resident stud.  After tattooing my bulging biceps with their tribal bands, they catered to my every need, shaving my dome smooth every day and keeping my beard impeccably trimmed.   There was some disagreement about which of them would be the first to bear my child, a conflict I feared would only escalate.  So I ....

[SLYinKC]

yelled, hold it ladies, there's enough of my SLY studness for everyone.  It will be a sacrifice for me, but one that I will bear just to be able to bring you pleasure and proliferate an ongoing breed of new little SLY amazons children that will be my gift to the world.  With extreme joy and profound appreciation they all bowed at my feet and began kissing my

[Razor X]

you-know-what.   It was exhausting but rewarding work.  Eventually, they began to view me as their king.   This was about the time that ....

[SLYinKC]

the girl from the perfume counter reappeared.  She had now ballooned another 75 pounds and she was really angry, as well as extremely hungry.  She was looking for revenge, along with a big hunk of meat and cheese.  She caught me off guard and secretly ran up from behind me and grabbed me around my

[jusbnme]

...leg but I was able to shake her off and then  I started running  for, what seemed like hours, until I came upon a hole in the ground.  I jumped in and found myself sliding down a very long tunnel which seemed so long that I imagined it was leading to the center of the earth.  Finally I could see light from below which indicated to me I must be nearing the end of this tunnel.  Finally I shot through the exit and...

[SLYinKC]

I couldn't believe it.  I was back at my house and sitting in the middle of my living room was a

[jusbnme]

...evil double of me with a full head of hair.  It came at me all of a sudden and all I could think to do was....

[SLYinKC]

struggle to try to subdue the evil double.  If he were to begin masquarading as me in public, my SLY reputation would be ruined.  I was finally able to pin him under a coffee table and reached to grab a