The never ending story....maybe

[Razor X]

... put a robe on and get a grip on myself.   I decided to head back to the store to confront the girl who ridiculed me.  Nobody laughs at me like that and gets away with it, nobody.  So I ....

[SLYinKC]

Ran into the store, found the girl, ripped the perfume samples from her tightly clutched fingers and raised my hand to...

[Kajun]

put the smack down on dis ho....cuz i got to keep mah pimp hand strong!..but i didnt feel like going to jail today so i....

[Razor X]

... caressed her cheek instead and then kissed her passionately.  Then I pulled out my gun and forced her to eat every candy bar in the store, hoping she'd gain a lot of weight and ruin the rest of her life.  Realizing that I had to get home to tend to my hostage soon, I ....

[SLYinKC]

I broke free from her soft and tender embrace and tenderly wipered to her...

[Razor X]

... "Give me all the Rogaine you've got in the store."  As soon as I got home, I planned to apply it all to the scalp of my hostage, hoping to jump-start his hair growth so I could get him the hell out of my basement.   When I got back to the house ....

[marshd1000]

The police and the fire department were there and they were all bald as cueballs, as they had all just freshly shaved.  Meanwhile the foxy female EMT grabbed me and gave me the most erotic French Kiss and said.....

[Razor X]

"Hey, give me back my gum!"   So I smiled sheepishly and then ....

[marshd1000]

 said, Only after you complete your CPR....I am feeling quite faint!  Suddenly the EMT said, who cares about the hostage in your house, all bald men drive me nuts!  At this point, a carriage pulled by a bunch of zebras took the EMT to the psych hospital.....

[Razor X]

... but not before she'd finished having her wicked way with me.   

Suddenly, all the stress and tension I'd been feeling were gone, allowing me to better focus on how to resolve my current dilemma -- getting the hostage out of my basement before the police and firemen all realized who I was.  Not to mention the fact that I still had to destroy his capability to be sly.  I sneaked around to the back of the house and ...

[marshd1000]

Treated the hostage to some yummy brownies that give you "the munchies".  After having this mind altering treat, the hostage looked in the mirror and thought he looked like Rosie O'Donnel, to which he replied.....

[PBurke]

" somebody shoot me. PLEASE!"  not wanting the cops to hear him, i then........

[Razor X]

Tried to quiet him down.   He began to weep, thinking that he'd been transformed from a cool sly dude into an overweight and unattractive comedienne with an attitude problem.  He begged me to ...

[PBurke]

..."call richard simmons quick" which was more than i could take. so i got out my golf clubs and.......

[marshd1000]

As I was about to club him, I said, "how about your freedom if you promise to wear hair like Donald Trump.  He then replied.....