Pre-maturely balding :(

[newby08]

I hope I'm not being annoying by asking for advice on this. I've always had really nice, thick black hair up until I was 19. At that point, the top (the crown area, I guess) started thinning. At first, it wasn't noticeable. However, it became worse as time went by. Now, it's pretty bad. I don't completely understand how this could be happening at 21 considering I live a very healthy lifestyle. I always spend half an hour in the morning style my hair to make it look unnoticeable, and for the past 3 months, I've been wearing a beanie to hide it even though I live in Miami and it's in the high 90s in the summer.  

It may sound vain of me but I really try to look as good as possible. I work out frequently, I'm really into fashion and love experimenting with clothes and accessorizing (I'm really metro lol), and am even regarded as attractive by a lot of people (again, I hope I'm not sounding vain). I was just unattractive and awkward in high school and picked on somewhat and resolved to never let that happen to me in college.

I'm thinking of shaving it, but I've always had my hair medium-length in a pompadour style and have always gotten compliments for it... I've been considering shaving it, but people's possible reactions scare me and I'm really afraid I would look unattractive. I've become extremely self-conscious and hardly go out anymore. Should I just take the plunge and go through with it? And does having hair matter all that much concerning attractiveness? Did you all experience many negative reactions?

Thanks for the help!

[buddha]

I don't know if there's such a thing as premature balding. It is what it is. It happens when it's supposed to happen. You can continue trying to hide it by spending a half hour in front of the mirror every morning or you can just go with it gracefully and quit worrying about the inevitable.
The other options are things like toupees, hair transplants, or different pharmaceuticals. All of these come with documented drawbacks aside from the expense. A lot of the people in here have written of their experiences with rugs, plugs, and drugs and the result for all of them is.....
They ended up here in Sly Bald Guys.
Hang around a while. You don't have to make any decisions right now. Read some of the accounts of people who have been where you are and how they dealt with it. Take your time and relax. Always remember to breathe, that is of utmost importance. What you imagine as people's "possible reactions" to shaving your head is the fear of a future that you cannot possibly foresee. Your true friends will most likely surprise you with their reactions. The reactions of those who are not true friends don't matter.

[newby08]

I don't know if there's such a thing as premature balding. It is what it is. It happens when it's supposed to happen. You can continue trying to hide it by spending a half hour in front of the mirror every morning or you can just go with it gracefully and quit worrying about the inevitable.
The other options are things like toupees, hair transplants, or different pharmaceuticals. All of these come with documented drawbacks aside from the expense. A lot of the people in here have written of their experiences with rugs, plugs, and drugs and the result for all of them is.....
They ended up here in Sly Bald Guys.
Hang around a while. You don't have to make any decisions right now. Read some of the accounts of people who have been where you are and how they dealt with it. Take your time and relax. Always remember to breathe, that is of utmost importance. What you imagine as people's "possible reactions" to shaving your head is the fear of a future that you cannot possibly foresee. Your true friends will most likely surprise you with their reactions. The reactions of those who are not true friends don't matter.

I mean "premature" in the sense that I'm the only one I know in my 20s going through this. I have been reading some posts, and I feel shaving/buzzing might be a good route to go though... I'm not sure if I'm ready, but I'll keep it in mind.

[JBite]

If you poke around the forum (especially the introductions section) you'll notice a lot of people who talk about losing their hair in their 20's (some even earlier), as well as others in their 20's who have hair but are "sly by choice." I started noticeably thinning on top at around 21/22...I'm nearing 25 now and I decided to go sly a couple of weeks ago. Prior to that I buzzed it relatively short, going gradually shorter within the last 6 months or so (as the thinning got worse), until I couldn't go any shorter with the clippers so I decided to shave it.

I'm not going to lie and say that I was instantly in love with it; it takes some getting used to but I do like the look (and honestly, it's easier to maintain than buzzing it). I'm certainly not happy with losing hair this young, but it doesn't really bother me as there's nothing I can do about it. I don't think it takes away from any "attractiveness" I might have (I've never been one for vanity), it's just a different look.

If you're not sure, I'd recommend buzzing it short at first. When in doubt, start longer, as you can always buzz it down further (but you can't put it back  ). When I went from a no-guard (shortest length) buzz to completely sly, it wasn't as big of a change.

Spend some time cruising the site here. It's a good bunch of people who are very supportive and helpful, without being patronizing. You'll find people in similar situations to yours as well as some of the "old guard" members who will offer their opinions, advice, and usually a good dose of humor in the process.

[newby08]

If you poke around the forum (especially the introductions section) you'll notice a lot of people who talk about losing their hair in their 20's (some even earlier), as well as others in their 20's who have hair but are "sly by choice." I started noticeably thinning on top at around 21/22...I'm nearing 25 now and I decided to go sly a couple of weeks ago. Prior to that I buzzed it relatively short, going gradually shorter within the last 6 months or so (as the thinning got worse), until I couldn't go any shorter with the clippers so I decided to shave it.

I'm not going to lie and say that I was instantly in love with it; it takes some getting used to but I do like the look (and honestly, it's easier to maintain than buzzing it). I'm certainly not happy with losing hair this young, but it doesn't really bother me as there's nothing I can do about it. I don't think it takes away from any "attractiveness" I might have (I've never been one for vanity), it's just a different look.

If you're not sure, I'd recommend buzzing it short at first. When in doubt, start longer, as you can always buzz it down further (but you can't put it back  ). When I went from a no-guard (shortest length) buzz to completely sly, it wasn't as big of a change.

Spend some time cruising the site here. It's a good bunch of people who are very supportive and helpful, without being patronizing. You'll find people in similar situations to yours as well as some of the "old guard" members who will offer their opinions, advice, and usually a good dose of humor in the process.

Thanks for the advice. I think I might try buzzing it down and maybe transition into lower guard #s. Btw, I hope this doesn't sound weird but I saw your first post and you actually pull it off well. Definitely encouraging for me.

[Cave Dweller]

Hey, Newby08!

Glad to have you here, sir.

I am one of the guys who started losing my hair when I was 17.  By 22, I had the MPB peninsula on top, and the bald dome by the time I was 30.  The shaved bald look at the time was not at all mainstream (as it is today), so I wore the horseshoe look for twenty years before shaving it all off six months ago.  I have never been happier.

As a lot of guys will tell you here, the only way to know if you will like being sly is to shave it off.  You cannot worry about what other people are going to think.  If YOU are confident in yourself, others are going to like it.  You will be surprised at how many compliments you get. If you are concerned about people thinking you shaved your head because you were losing your hair, the time to do it is while you still look like you have a full head.

Going sly is incredibly liberating.

[newby08]

Going sly is incredibly liberating.

That's what I've been reading on the some of the posts - that's it's really freeing... I have to admit it sounds enticing.

I have a date on Saturday so maybe I'll try going shorter on Sunday and see where that leads... I don't want to experiment with my hair that much for a date I'm looking forward to lol

[newby08]

Btw, thanks for the help, you guys. It's definitely useful for me. I'm just scared of having to face the inevitable.

[Sir Harry]

Welcome, newby08!......It;s natural to be scared when shaving, but it will be worth it once you do it.....Good luck!

[newby08]

After seeing the replies and other posts, I think I might go through with it. I'm not going to do it today because I want to look good for the date but most likely I'll try to get it shaved tomorrow. I'm honestl really nervous of how it'll turn out... How did you all get rid of that anxiety and just do it?

[Cave Dweller]

How did you all get rid of that anxiety and just do it?

Just take a deep breath and start.  It is like the first time you go off the diving board.

The very first pass with the clippers is the hardest part.  Once you start, it is easy to finish.

[Mr Jules]

... I'm really into fashion ....

Last night, was told that shaving your head is fashionable...

[newby08]

So I decided not to wait and I'm at a barbershop now to get this over with. It's a 45 minute wait and I'm feeling tempted now to chicken out lol

[Mr Jules]

Satisfy your curiosity. Good luck at the barber's. Sure you will like the new you. Expect plenty of interest afterwards.

[newby08]

Walking to the chair now... Wish me luck I guess