Be BOLD but not always BALD

[BeBoldbutnotalwaysBald]

Hi my names Adam and this is my story.  I started losing my hair at about 16 and for near on 8 years I'd been shaving my head using different methods; razors, shavers.. Basically always making sure it was as close to the skin as i could get it.  When i first started shaving it i would still wear a hat over the top.  I don't know why it made a difference whether i shaved it before i put the hat on or not but for some reason it did.  Maybe i thought if anyone ever pulled my hat off then at least it only looks like a shaved head and not that i was losing my hair if that makes sense.  I didn't like the feel of new hair growing and saw it as dirty and that i wasn't clean.  This went on for a number of years and it was only ever now and then when i felt confident enough to take my hat off that i did.  Either that or it was an occasion like a wedding or something.  It's only been over the last few years that I've actually come to embrace my baldness as it were and up until then i was a very unconfident person I'll tell you.  It actually took a major event in my life which i won't bother you with before i thought 'you know what.. stuff it!' and held my head proud.

BUT that isn't the end of my story...

So i was fairly confident in my new look (new to me as I'd always wore a hat) and felt i was showing that confidence (i thought confidence was the main part to looking good) but after a while i started to notice something.  I was working at a petrol station at the time and started to find that people weren't paying me much attention regardless of how much attention i payed them.  So much in fact that people were actually trying not to make eye contact with me on purpose.  Also family members seemed much the same way and only close family showed me any respect..?  I found people were randomly laughing at me too.  Now you could say i was paranoid, plus i thought other things may play a part too. I thought it must just all be in my head because I'd always thought to myself that i was 'decent looking' in no way stunning but not 'ugly'..  So for a while i was depressed and couldn't deal with the fact that regardless of how much confidence i portrayed it wasn't working for me.  So what now?  I was getting increasingly depressed and kept thinking i should just go back to wearing a hat as it was the only kind of 'safety blanket' i had if you will.  Then something amazing happened.. I'd given up shaving my head and face for near on 3 days which i hadn't let happen out in public for nearly 8 years!  I was just so fed up that i didn't care anymore.  I didn't even look at myself for the 3 days i let it go.  I set off out the door.. 'She smiled at me!?'...  'He looked afraid of me!?' What was happening?? i got to work and the atmosphere was totally different from normal.  People wanted to talk to me.. they actually wanted to acknowledge me.  Regular customers were greeting me in ways they'd never greeted me before.  I felt 'normal' for the first time in along time.  'But why?? I can't look good with this crap all over me surely??'  After a while i went to toilet where theres a mirror and couldn't believe it.  All of a sudden just with 3 days stubble growth I'd gone from this weird looking big headed bald guy to someone who looks quite intimidating.. the bit of hair seemed to frame my face regardless of the fact it was only on the sides and the back and the short beard/stubble helped it.

So here's my point and conclusion to my story.  Embrace your hair loss, that's fine and even shave it off for awhile but just because your losing your hair does not mean you have to lose ALL your hair..  going totally bald is not for everyone especially if you have a weird shaped head like mine.  That being said, i do believe you can pull off any look as long you have the confidence and that 'i am happy and i don't care' look in your eyes.  I've learnt people do treat you differently regardless of your look if you have the confidence.  So although i believe its not the main part to looking good and feeling good, it is a big one, never the less I found it harder to feel that way completely bald.  I think the Jason Statham look is for me and i will continue to use it as long as I'm getting the positive attention that i am.  I'm not an attention seeker in any shape or form but i do like to be 'accepted' and I'm sure there are many bald guys who feel the same.  So if you are in any situation I've been in, all I'd say is try it.. book a week off work, make sure you don't have anything planned and just let your hair grow and see if you notice a change..  try to be positive, confident and talk to people throughout the process and see how they react.  I can tell easily now when people are 'accepting' of me and you will notice it too I'm sure.  Then you can always control it with either a clipper or a beard/stubble trimmer.  Hope my story helped  

[Sir Harry]

Welcome, sir! As I told another member who posted a similar story, (see the topic "MPB Horseshoe Barbershop Experience" in the thread "Trimming Your Head/Hair") the purpose of the site is for people, regardless of whether they elect to shave their (remaining) hair or not, is to still be confident and live a full life despite hair loss. We do have members that elect to buzz their hair shorter over shaving it, and there's a place here for you too as long as you follow the rules. Again, thanks for joining and sharing your point of view and story, and if you get a chance, please post a photo.

[kalbo]

Great story Adam. Thanks for sharing your story. It may not be the general opinion on this site but it offers a different and fresh point of view. What matters most is how you feel and if the Jason Statham look is what makes you happy and confident, you have my two thumbs up.

[TheSlyBear]

There is absolutely nothing at all wrong with looking like Jason Statham.

[Laser Man]

Whatever look makes you happy should be the one you stick with. 

[OzSly]

G'Day Adam mate 

Thanks for sharing your story mate. Welcome aboard!!

[Lynchy]

Welcome mate!

[jedge01]

My wife and both adult daughters like Jason Stathams look, so it must not be all bad. Welcome!

[Quetzalcoatl]

I can definately agree.  I tend to only shave once every other day or so now.  I would only do a short buzz, but I love the smooth feel and the occasional head rub.

[Tyler]

While most of the guys here shave their heads, that's only because that's what makes them most confident.  Sly Bald Guys is about helping guys deal with their hair loss in positive ways, and if that means accepting it for the way it looks without shaving or just buzzing, then that's great.