Author Topic: New Here. 22 and shaved, but recently struggling.  (Read 4728 times)

Offline KludgyMonk

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New Here. 22 and shaved, but recently struggling.
« on: May 20, 2012, 03:00:23 PM »
Hi guys. I've been a lurker for a while, but reading these forums helped me decide to shave back in November.

For a while I had had thinning hair on the top of my head, but I tried to hide it under gel. I finally decided to shave one day after not being able to get the hair the way I wanted to anymore. After that I shaved clean with a van dike, but I always wore a hat. \

Once the weather started to warm up I got rid of the hat and started to walk around without it. I felt the mustache made me look too old so I shaved it off. I was okay with everything for a while, until I saw a picture of myself recently at a get together. I suddenly wasn't okay with my look anymore. I don't know If I should grow the mustache back or shorten the goatee (since after I shaved the mustache I grew it past my chin horizontally) but any advice would be appreciated. I'm kind of lost at what to do with my facial hair and hair in general.

At the party
http://imgur.com/CnEyV,0w2sp#1
http://imgur.com/p7ZY6

Before with hat, smaller chin hair and mustache
http://imgur.com/CnEyV,0w2sp#0

Before shaving. Top of my head. In the middle
http://imgur.com/q1ev8



Offline D.A.L.U.I.

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Re: New Here. 22 and shaved, but recently struggling.
« Reply #1 on: May 20, 2012, 03:41:30 PM »
Well, I think you look fine with the sly head and chin mitten.  Maybe your job requires dark suits and shirts, but I'd lighten the colors up a little.  It's a good look, though overall.  Curious what you look like dressed more casually. 
Oh, and right choice on the hair, Mother Nature doesn't play favorites, but she sure is sloppy!  Shaving was absolutely the right thing. 

Offline Itall

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Re: New Here. 22 and shaved, but recently struggling.
« Reply #2 on: May 20, 2012, 03:43:33 PM »
Well, I think you look fine with the sly head and chin mitten.  Maybe your job requires dark suits and shirts, but I'd lighten the colors up a little.  It's a good look, though overall.  Curious what you look like dressed more casually. 
Oh, and right choice on the hair, Mother Nature doesn't play favorites, but she sure is sloppy!  Shaving was absolutely the right thing.


Ditto

Offline KDusk

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Re: New Here. 22 and shaved, but recently struggling.
« Reply #3 on: May 20, 2012, 03:46:37 PM »
Welcome to the forums KludgyMonk.

The initial shock concerning the pictures is normal, I think. You'll get used to the look soon, though, both in the mirror and in pictures.

I think you made the right call about shaving your head, though. You look great sly.

I also started growing a beard a couple of weeks ago, only to trim it short because I felt it dragged my face down (and made me look older). Last week I accidentally shaved away a part of my beard while shaving my head and I had to get rid of the entire beard. No facial hair makes me look younger, but also completely blank, like something was missing. Right now I'm growing it out again and I'll just keep it short, which I think is the optimal effect of having facial hair, but not looking too old/scruffy.

If you ask me: keep your head shaved and also keep the trimmed goatee (like how you looked at the party). Old? No. Mature? Yes. But keep experimenting in the meanwhile and eventually you will find a look that you like. You're lucky to have a nice oval face shape, so I think you can get away with almost every style.

EDIT: BTW, here are some pictures of me without facial hair, with groomed facial hair, and with a 2 weeks untouched growth (except for the neckline). It's just to let you see what a difference a groomed/shaped beard makes. I guess the massive eyebags in the last picture don't really help either, lol.

« Last Edit: May 28, 2012, 12:08:01 AM by KDusk »

Offline Lynchy

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Re: New Here. 22 and shaved, but recently struggling.
« Reply #4 on: May 20, 2012, 04:11:33 PM »
Welcome! I think you look great sly!

Re: beard it looks fine IMO

However I am a big fan of the full beard, or a trimmed designer stubble!

Horses for courses, if your not happy with your look then change it!

Let us know how you get on!
Lynchy

marty22

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Re: New Here. 22 and shaved, but recently struggling.
« Reply #5 on: May 20, 2012, 06:19:27 PM »
welcome. you made the right call to shave it.

Offline Frontier Guy

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Re: New Here. 22 and shaved, but recently struggling.
« Reply #6 on: May 20, 2012, 06:36:02 PM »
I'll weigh in with an opinion as well.

I'm not sure what you're finding objectionable - other than you've lived with various looks over time and you have numerous perceptions of yourself.

However, as I've never met you, my first impression (of the party look) is quite positive. There's an aura of confidence and self-assurance. I think it works for you.

It can be difficult getting the "inner you" aligned with the "outer you" - especially when the outer shell keeps changing. I'm only on Day #3 of the shaved dome and I am quite surprised whenever I catch my reflection or touch my head.

I'd keep the "party look" without a second thought.
"Sly can adapt to all surroundings!" - Wisdom from KG 8/19/2012

Offline KludgyMonk

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Re: New Here. 22 and shaved, but recently struggling.
« Reply #7 on: May 20, 2012, 06:55:32 PM »
Thank you for the kind words and support everyone! Especially being told I made the right choice in shaving.

I think my biggest issue had been being the only sly guy within my group of friends and I always kind of felt off despite personally liking it.

This post definitely helped me with figuring out if I made the right choice or not. I'm going to try and stop worrying about how I think my friends see my appearance and focus more on what I personally like.

I'm happy to have finally joined the website. I think it will definitely help build my confidence about my new look.

Thank you all, again!

Offline Cris

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Re: New Here. 22 and shaved, but recently struggling.
« Reply #8 on: May 20, 2012, 07:03:21 PM »
Hi guys. I've been a lurker for a while, but reading these forums helped me decide to shave back in November.

For a while I had had thinning hair on the top of my head, but I tried to hide it under gel. I finally decided to shave one day after not being able to get the hair the way I wanted to anymore. After that I shaved clean with a van dike, but I always wore a hat. \

Once the weather started to warm up I got rid of the hat and started to walk around without it. I felt the mustache made me look too old so I shaved it off. I was okay with everything for a while, until I saw a picture of myself recently at a get together. I suddenly wasn't okay with my look anymore. I don't know If I should grow the mustache back or shorten the goatee (since after I shaved the mustache I grew it past my chin horizontally) but any advice would be appreciated. I'm kind of lost at what to do with my facial hair and hair in general.

At the party
http://imgur.com/CnEyV,0w2sp#1
http://imgur.com/p7ZY6

Before with hat, smaller chin hair and mustache
http://imgur.com/CnEyV,0w2sp#0

Before shaving. Top of my head. In the middle
http://imgur.com/q1ev8
Ok, this is my opinion, ok?
Personal opinion.
Not the truth.
I would take away everything.
Zero Hair on the scalp.
Zero hair on your face.

Offline D.A.L.U.I.

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Re: New Here. 22 and shaved, but recently struggling.
« Reply #9 on: May 20, 2012, 07:19:41 PM »
I think my biggest issue had been being the only sly guy within my group of friends
Well, it won't be long until lots of your friends and acquaintances will join you--the statistics increase the number of guys with mpb at 10% for every ten years, so at your next milestone, 30, 30% of your group will be experiencing mpb--and really it's not a bad thing.  You're the leader now--and a fine example of how it's to be done.  Glad you found us. 

Offline xnewyawka

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Re: New Here. 22 and shaved, but recently struggling.
« Reply #10 on: May 20, 2012, 07:24:03 PM »
I think my biggest issue had been being the only sly guy within my group of friends
Well, it won't be long until lots of your friends and acquaintances will join you--the statistics increase the number of guys with mpb at 10% for every ten years, so at your next milestone, 30, 30% of your group will be experiencing mpb--and really it's not a bad thing.  You're the leader now--and a fine example of how it's to be done.  Glad you found us. 

Welcome Monk. I agree with saintc; lead by example, why not be the start of something new in your group?

Offline kalbo

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Re: New Here. 22 and shaved, but recently struggling.
« Reply #11 on: May 20, 2012, 08:27:08 PM »
Welcome to the bald brotherhood KludgyMonk. Let me add to those who approve of your choice to embrace baldness. You wear it really well. You look great with and without facial hair. Keep your options open.
Mabuhay ang mga kalbo!

Offline Lynchy

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Re: New Here. 22 and shaved, but recently struggling.
« Reply #12 on: May 20, 2012, 10:49:37 PM »
This post definitely helped me with figuring out if I made the right choice or not. I'm going to try and stop worrying about how I think my friends see my appearance and focus more on what I personally like.


Good!

A little poem I love, seems fitting in your situation!

http://www.boardofwisdom.com/mailquote.asp?msgid=10257
Lynchy

Offline SalWalker

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Re: New Here. 22 and shaved, but recently struggling.
« Reply #13 on: May 20, 2012, 11:19:59 PM »
Dude, you look great with the shaved head and goatee.  The "party look" is fantastic.  Especially with the glasses and dark suit.  It's a good look.  My impression: in the party pictures, you look like the guy who knows what he's about and ain't got time for mess.

I agree with what KDusk and Frontier guy have said: it takes a while before your self-image catches up with your image...or sometimes vice-versa. 

So far as I can tell, and for what it's worth, you've made two good decisions: shaving the head and joining SBG; these guys are really supportive and a little positive feedback from them does wonders for your confidence.
"If you wish to improve, be content to be thought foolish and stupid."  - Epictetus

Offline Sir Harry

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Re: New Here. 22 and shaved, but recently struggling.
« Reply #14 on: May 21, 2012, 12:41:55 AM »
Welcome! Your appearance is much improved, and as the days go by, your confidence will improve. Good Luck!
Even when the d is removed, the devil is still evil.

 



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