Confidence and Success > How to Build Confidence

The acceptance process

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Morton:
My abbreviated story.

My father had a bad comb-over and I'd heard stories of how my grandfather had been bald at 19 or whatever. Even so I never thought I'd go bald. I really had great hair and perfect for the time, think George Michael, Simon le Bon and the lead singer of Japan. I was also quite a good looking guy and popular with the ladies. I denied my genes, baldness wasn't for me.

Anyway when I was 17 I went to the Med on holiday. I noticed on coming back my hair wasn't quite what it used to be but I blamed it on the sand. In reality I had probably started balding. For some reason my baldness progressed quite slowly. I never had a bald spot my hair just slowly thinned. I went abroad to live when I was 27 and came back a few years later with similar hair. My friends told me that they thought I'd be bald. If anything my hair had gotten thicker. I don't know why this happened, maybe diet, maybe genes, probably luck.

I was 29 when my first child was born. I have a decent head of hair in the pictures but baldness was in the back of my mind. My real balding or second balding phase seemed to start around this time. I cut my hair short so again with no actual bald spot it wasn't so noticeable. Then when I was 35 I went to a wedding. On seeing the pictures I was shocked. I basically had the beginnings of a comb-over though I didn't even realise it (still had no bald spot though). In disgust at myself for allowing such a ridiculous hairstyle I just went to the sink and shaved my head bald.

And you know what I wasn't apprehensive or scared and I've loved it from day one. That's it, balding is over for me, bad hair days are over for me, comb overs are over for me and sunscreens are well in for me.

In saying all that. When I really went bald I was at an age/time of my life when it didn't matter as much as it might have. I was married and had sowed my oats so to speak. And when I shaved my head I was self-employed so I didn't have to worry about what bosses/co-workers thought. I might have found it more difficult were I younger.

I will say one thing. Although I would have loved to have kept my hair going bald wasn't super traumatic for me. But as I know that going bald is extremely traumatic for many, many men I do worry about my own son's reaction. I am really more worried about my son's probable baldness than I was about my own. I also live in a hairy country. My youngest just graduated kindergarten in a class of 26. The other fathers are probably in their 30s and 40s. I am the only father in the class who is in any way bald. Every other father has a full head of hair as far as I could see.

Goodfishfrancis:
Welcome to the SBG, Peteman! You look great, dude. Nothing to worry about ;)

Mr Jules:
Agree with the others.

There's nothing to accept. You look great.

mangosink12572:
Mr. Jules is right on target - - -

Don't you know that mother nature made just so many perfect heads - -the rest she covered with hair.

I feel so proud and lucky to be one of the perfect ones  - - - -and so are you.

Slyfive:
Pete, first of all, you look great, secondly, your intro shows that you are in an excellent mental state to accept and enjoy balding, this really will help. I was pretty torn up when I started balding (started receding at 18, now 23), and I became very withdrawn... But bald is entirely different to balding, it's freedom!

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