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#15 by SCjay on 15 Dec, 2011 23:48
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Another thing that makes this extremely hard for me is the fact that right before/around the time I decided to go fully sly, I found out a girl Ive liked since freshman year(senior now) now liked me. We still talk a good bit via text but when we get around each other I cant help but to think she remembers me when I had hair and I just get really self conscious and cant be myself. I really need to get over this soon or else shes just gonna move on.
You might find out that this girl really likes the sly look - many women find it very sexy and attractive.
Remember, if you shave your head and don't like it, your hair will grow back pretty quickly. In my way of thinking, you really aren't taking a big risk.
Yea but then I would have a horseshoe which no girl would like. -
#16 by SCjay on 17 Dec, 2011 09:08
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Another thing that makes this extremely hard for me is the fact that right before/around the time I decided to go fully sly, I found out a girl Ive liked since freshman year(senior now) now liked me. We still talk a good bit via text but when we get around each other I cant help but to think she remembers me when I had hair and I just get really self conscious and cant be myself. I really need to get over this soon or else shes just gonna move on.
Also wanna say that if this girl was to say she liked my head, then that would be all I need. I used to talk to this girl who only saw me bald because I was at my friends house for July 4th weekend and we were out on his dock so I wasnt wearing a hat. She only ever saw me bald and liked it, so I could be myself around her and not worry about other things. The only problem with just straight up asking her is that that is showing a sign of insecurity which is a turn off to girls. I just need to be confident in it regardless, which is what Im working on now.
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#17 by SCjay on 17 Dec, 2011 13:11
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Hey mate,
Well didn't I come to the right place! Don't want to sound overly enthusiastic on top of the subject, but I've passed the same road you're passing now. While we can still meet each other on it, as I'm still not at the goal. I'm mostly mentaly over my hair loss, but iut's still there bugging me, though I'm trying to make the best I can of it. I'm also thin (74KG) and tall (184cm) and when shaved bald I tend to look like I should be arrested. I'm also pale. I also tried getting buffed but it's really overly difficult to get 2KG and keep it for a month. So I just try to work out (swimming) and do best with what I got.
Can't really find perfect words of comfort because I don't know them yet. But, have you tried with beard? Those few hairs on the beard made me feel more comfortable. That's a fact.
But as somebody said (Dr Phil sheh), you wouldn't think of what people think of you if you knew how rarely they do. That doesn't help does it? A bit.
PM me your chat username and I'll be happy to talk with you. We can cry together over the net hehe. Seriously you have the SAME problems as I do. Same rotten path! God help us. I'm kidding, we'll be fine!
[EDIT] Yes and I read it all. I believe that most of people will read what you said. You sound sharp minded and quite eloquent. Just got a problem to deal with.
[EDIT2] Right, sorry I was typing this at 6AM, I see you wrote about beard. Beard is one thing we'll all certainly develop and is a good way to put some hair around the face.
Ill be honest man, the bald look definitely suits you.
And as far as this statement goes: "when shaved bald I tend to look like I should be arrested", girls equate this to "he looks like a badass" so definitely not a bad problem lol. -
#18 by SCjay on 18 Dec, 2011 07:32
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I believe its worse for us in a college setting who have to be around 99% of people who still have all their hair. I always wear a hat when I go out because I just feel really insecure without a hat and it sucks because I know people can sense that.
On the contrary, I can't think of a less judgmental environment that a college campus when it comes to personal appearance. And you'd be surprised if you knew how many people don't have a clue as to how much hair you do or don't have. I get asked fairly frequently how much hair I'd have if I didn't shave, even though I think it's pretty obvious that I wouldn't have very much . At your age, a lot of people will assume it's just a haircut choice. Others will assume that you've started to lose your hair, but they really won't know how much.
My thing about this though, is that even after a fresh shave against the grain you can still see the hairline even though it is hidden a little. My only solution to this is to get tanner, which hopefully will darken up the skin enough to not make the hair stick out so much against a white, un-tanned head. -
#19 by Razor X on 18 Dec, 2011 19:47
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I believe its worse for us in a college setting who have to be around 99% of people who still have all their hair. I always wear a hat when I go out because I just feel really insecure without a hat and it sucks because I know people can sense that.
On the contrary, I can't think of a less judgmental environment that a college campus when it comes to personal appearance. And you'd be surprised if you knew how many people don't have a clue as to how much hair you do or don't have. I get asked fairly frequently how much hair I'd have if I didn't shave, even though I think it's pretty obvious that I wouldn't have very much . At your age, a lot of people will assume it's just a haircut choice. Others will assume that you've started to lose your hair, but they really won't know how much.
My thing about this though, is that even after a fresh shave against the grain you can still see the hairline even though it is hidden a little. My only solution to this is to get tanner, which hopefully will darken up the skin enough to not make the hair stick out so much against a white, un-tanned head.
I can see my hairline, too and it seems very obvious to me where it is. But apparently it's not that obvious to everybody. You'd be amazed at how many people don't pay attention that that sort of thing. Earlier this year, a local news crew got a shot of me walking down the street and used it in one of their stories about the latest hair restoration techniques. People that I work with were all like, "But you aren't bald -- your head is shaved!" I couldn't believe how many of them were apparently under the impression that I could grow out a lot moe than is actually the case.
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#20 by kevin on 20 Dec, 2011 13:30
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It will get easier with time.
There will be people out there who think it looks great. I remember when I first shaved, I was so self-conscious about it and had a party to go to where people had never seen me bald. I had it all in my head they were all going to laugh and not like it.
I received a lot of compliments - brings out your eyes from a few women and a few guys said it looked really good. Yet the one and only negative comment I received was the one I focused on for days ''Your ears look bigger with that haircut''.
Then I thought to myself that some people will never be happy and that's what makes us great. We are all different. The guy who mentioned my ears is often downbeat, negative and always picking up something he sees with someone and he has no confidence at all.
Maybe some of your pals are similar and seen you as an easy target due to your hair loss and the baseball cap wearing.
Like some have said, so many people are too pre-occupied with themselves that they will even notice. When I first shaved a few guys even said ''What have you done? You look different'' and I kid you not, they were not joking, they just couldn't place if I had grown a beard, lost weight.
I'm not sly at the moment so maybe my advice isn't all merited to having gone away from the sly life (but I will be back, no worries at all of that).
Keep yourself in shape, keep treating your girlfriend great (she sounds brilliant, just like mine who was so open and helpful when I shaved) and enjoy life.
take care -
#21 by 4fit on 15 Jan, 2012 16:05
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