1st 7 days (as told from within my head to entertain you)

• 1st 7 days (as told from within my head to entertain you) by Acme on 25 Aug, 2011 20:45
• The Deed:   It’s  8/18/11 at 6pm.  Why am I trembling?  I’ll just start slowly with the side’s real close and leave the thinning top and see what that looks like.  Jeez, I’m a minute in and I don’t want to be here all night.  I’m only 115 lbs. and I need to eat dinner.   I’ll take the clipper and cut the path from my forehead right across the top of my head.  Wow, I feel better already.  There’s no turning back and I’m not trembling anymore.  That was about 40 minutes with a clipper, electric shaver and Gillette razor.   Man!  I’m looking good.  I think I look younger.  I really did it?  I didn’t cut myself?  Yeah, I love it!  I even like that scar I got when I was 4 years old.  I’ll tell everyone I got it in Nam.  I can’t believe that was all the hair that came off my head.  That’s not much!  Is my head supposed to feel like it’s on fire?
  
  Day one:  I’m diggin’ it!  But, I don’t have anywhere I need to go so I’ll just stay in and look at myself in disbelief.  I’ll get the mail with a hat on because I don’t want the sun to burn my head.  It’s a 30 foot walk to that mailbox and I could be outside for up to 30 seconds. That wasn’t so hard but I’m going to have to swear off hats for 30 days too.  I almost never wear hats so if I start now, that defeats the purpose of the 30 days.   I’ll wait ‘till the sun goes down to walk outside and get the box I left in my car.  I won’t need the hat when it’s dark.
  
  Day two:  I’ll invite some family over for dinner this evening.  I don’t think my head is too white but I’ll slather sunscreen all over it and do some yard.  Ok, I can go out in the daylight and I’m still ok even though I don’t think anyone really saw me.  I’ll go shave this thing again so it’s nice and smooth tonight.  Thankfully, that head on fire feeling is gone.  Great, family is here.  I can’t wait to show this off….. Oh well.  Overall, really good reaction except from my mother.  Good thing she has another son and he still has his hair.  Oh, except for that patch missing from the back.  I think she always liked him better anyway.
  
  Day three:  I’m going to go to the store.  I need to get some products for this head.  I swore I wasn’t wearing a hat for 30 days so I’m going buff.  Hmmmmm.  Act natural.  They don’t know I just did this.  I could have been this way for years.  Let me look up at the store security mirror (I wasn’t looking for shop lifters) and make sure no one is looking at me.  I’m walking past these people and they don’t care about me.  They aren’t gawking as I walk by.  Could it be my head isn’t the center of the universe?
  
  Day four:  1st day back at work.  Fantastic!  I wanted to wake up at 3am with my heart pounding.  I don’t need sleep.  I need to lay here for a few hours and think about what I’m going to say to each person as they laugh and make their joke.  I’ll give it about two hours before I call HR and report all of them!  I can’t believe I did this.  Now I’m walking into the office with no hair.  Where’s all the confidence I had the past three days?  There’s Robert and Andre, I’ll go ask them if they want to be the first to make a joke.  I can’t believe they didn’t take the opportunity.  I hear the general manager coming.  He stopped dead and is staring at me.  What?  He thinks it looks great? I have a good shaped head for this?   I thought he was the first person I was going to report to HR.  Overall, that was a pretty good day.  However, I think one guy is mad at me.  It’s his choice to walk around with that big open crop circle on his head.  Not my problem!
  
  Day five:  Why do I still feel so self-conscious?  I’ve seen most of these people and they seem to be handling it well. I’ve gotten lots of compliments.  I’m going to the bank to get out of here for a little while.  Do bald people get treated differently at the bank?  Why are all those cameras aimed at me?
  
  Day six:  I still can’t shave the melon properly.  After doing a lousy job with the razor, I break out the electric and re-do the whole thing.  I’m feeling more normal as I walk around at work since almost everyone has seen me already.  I’m going to see my grandmother tonight.  I can’t believe she said she can get used to it but maybe it would look better without the beard.  What a progressive 92 year old grandmother.  I had a friend stop by tonight in disbelief that I did this when it wasn’t necessary (yet!).  He said, “more people should probably do that as I sit here sporting this (he puts his hand on his head which is completely bald on top with a rather long hair horseshoe).”
  
  Day seven:  Wow.  All of a sudden I’m getting better with the razor.  I only have a few minor touch ups to do with the electric.  I also feel completely normal.  I can’t believe how high my anxiety level was the past few days.  I was really almost sick.  I don’t know what I would have done without the SBG website.  I can’t believe how often I kept going back to it to calm myself down.  I am really thankful there is such a great group of guys offering support for this and I’m glad I didn’t go down the medication/transplant/hair system road.  I have never felt so good about myself and at ease with life and I can’t wait to be referred to as “The bald guy”.
  
  Glenn
• #1 by mrzed on 26 Aug, 2011 04:43
• Nice diary.
  
• #2 by SayNoMore on 26 Aug, 2011 12:53
• Great post bro!
• #3 by Acme on 26 Aug, 2011 18:29
• Thank you very much.  These were my actual thoughts.  I just wanted to convey that while I personally was extremely happy with the new look and feel, internally I was still stressing out.  I was lucky that I had such really good reactions and it still wasn't until day seven that I had turned the corner to be more comfortable.  And like I said, I feel so much better (not worrying about the thining and receding hairline) that it has helped my attitude and outlook.  Hopefully someone can relate to my internal conflict and realize it's all worth it.
  
  Now that I've been through day 8, I realized what made the shave so much better between day 6 and 7.  I went real slow.  This morning, I went very slowly ATG once or twice and it came out great.  I also figured out I need to go at a 45 degree angle on the sides.  I'm still having issues just past the ear on each side before you get to the back and I'm having trouble at the back crown of the head where the hair goes in all kinds of directions.  Hopefully it won't take me too long to figure those areas out.
• #4 by SayNoMore on 26 Aug, 2011 19:44
• I'm on day 26 and I am still trying to figure my crown out. Some days are better than others. I think it just takes some time to get used to. I have gotten better at shaving the crown, but still have room for improvement.
• #5 by baldjoeg on 28 Aug, 2011 19:46
• 
  
  Congradulations Acme. You look great. I like the beard too!
  
   It will get easier as time goes by.
  
  Enjoy your great new look.
  
   
• #6 by zetaeffe on 29 Aug, 2011 22:40
• Guess I felt almost the same when I did it first time: was 1995, more than 16 years ago... and I'm stll bald today (or even balder...) 
  I remember thensame anxiety that lasted until I saw at least once everybody who knew me: once everybody havs had his "first time reaction" then you're done with it 
• #7 by Acme on 30 Aug, 2011 09:34
• Yeah.  It really took me that first 7 days to get over it and was very stressful on me.  I'm comfortable that it IS me now and don't have the anxiety as I still see people that haven't seen it yet.  This has really taught me a lesson in reacting to other people too.  If they make a change whether by choice or by circumstance, I would be supportive of them and try to make them feel comfortable.
• #8 by Laser Man on 30 Aug, 2011 10:22
• The anxiety diminishes pretty quickly.  Last week I went to one of my company's locations about 100 miles away for the first time since going sly.  I didn't even think about it and no one commented about the difference in my appearance.  Afterwards, I met a former co-worker for dinner.  Her reaction was to say that it looks really good and she asked if I'm planning to stay bald. When I said yes, she said, "good for you!"
  
  So, I'm comfortable and confident in my (not so new anymore) look.  I hope you reach the same point soon!