21 Years Old- Receeding and Thinning- Confidence Issue- Your Opinions?

[AvengedSevenfold]

Hi Guys,

Firstly may I say what a superb site this is. I'll try and explain my story as best I can.


I'm 21. Up until 16, I always had short hair. Then I reached college (16-18 here in the UK) and got into rock bands and grew my hair and tried to go for that shitty fringe that everyone at that time went for haha. I always wondered why I couldn't get my hair to look great but now I realise that it was because my hair was thin, and has continued frontal thinning and to recede up until now- 21. From when I was 17 until just before I was 20, I had a GF who loved my hair and she was always into guys with a bit of that rock/indie rock image. I think that might have played a part in why it has taken me a while to face up to my hair problem- I feared that shaving it would mean I couldn't get any girls.

The stuff that goes through your mind at 21 is like "How am I gonna pull with a shaved head" "All girls seem obsessed with 'cute' hairstyles and spikey looks etc" and "Will I only appeal to older women?".

So for the last couple of years at university, I've been battling with my confidence. I still have the longish hair and use loads of hairspray to 'set' it in place. I was always a sporty guy, but because of my hair, I stopped doing it as I feared it would expose my hair line and people would laugh. Now I've started to put a bit of weight on and that for me is enough- I need to f**k this hair off and go back to being me- sporty, unconcerned by image, and happy.

Maybe a few of you can relate to all of these thoughts?


I've made a big step by joining this forum- there was a time where I'd be too scared but I'm wisening up and just have to take the plunge.

In my head, I think I'd like to shave to like, grade 3 (I dunno- you guys may understand better than I do!) all over so I have that bit of shadow- I think it adds a bit of a dark and mysterious look to a man. A lot of people tell me they love it when I grow stubble, so maybe that can help too?

But as you might imagine, it's been one of those things where you think 'Omg I cant be bald at uni' but I'm realising now that hey, wait a minute, just cos I shave my hair doesnt mean I change my face, my physique, or my personality. And I reckon those 3 are far more important than bloody hair!

The attitude I've adopted these last couple of days is 'Well I wasn't Brad Pitt with hair, so don't be scared of having a go without!'. I've been coming round these last few months (slowly) and have actually found this more relaxed, open me has seen me get a couple more ladies- so maybe my confidence is coming back now that I am getting more relaxed about where I'm heading with my image? Girls always say they like a guy with confidence, so the way forward must be to just sort out the dome, wear a big smile and be confident in who I AM- not anyone bloody else. Some girls might prefer me with hair, but on the other hand some will like me with a shaved head, right?

What would your advice be, and how could I best start? And how do I get the Freddie Ljunberg look? He seems to rock the buzz cut well!


Thanks for your time guys, as much feedback as possible would be wondeful.


-Well done on this site.

[Razor X]

It sounds like you already know what you need to do.  The best thing you can do is just do it and get it over with, because the anticipation is far worse than the deed itself.  I'd go shorter than a #3 -- go to at least #2 and take things from there.  I think you'll find that you'll like it a lot more than you thought you would. 

[Glen]

If you want a "bit of shadow" you will definitely want to go shorter that a #3.  I would recommend starting with at least a #2 and work your way shorter.  As far as not getting girls with a shaved head, try telling Vin Diesel, Andre Agassi, Michael Jordan, Kelly Slater... that girls don't like shaved heads.

[AvengedSevenfold]

When did you guys start losing hair, can you relate to the confidence issues that go through your mind too?



What was your plan of action, did you shave immediately, cut down really short, or gradually shave with lower numbers?



How much has it helped your confidence since taking the plunge, I imagine it is pretty liberating once you get used to it?

[MisterAdversity]

Havent taken the plunge just yet but im in the same boat,
confidence is def effected and i try to avoid anything outdoors in the bright sun without a hat (i still have that young look so i can still get away with that hat look but still i hate being "the hat guy" and one of my top3 reasons i want to get on with my life,

The buzz things freaks me out right now since i have never done it and dont want the shock of it looking bad and having to wait for it to grow out, but since i know friends who have went through far worse (toupee's and buzzing to complete shave) it shouldnt be that bad the transition

I am most likely going to a #2 buzz in a month or so and will have 2mos to see if i like it or not, perfect time to do so in the summer so it doesnt affect my Sept. job (work in education where the slightest change is NOTICEABLE to everyone!) another reason why i am waiting

[kenny57028]

I can relate to you, I also started balding at 17. I am now 19. Mine was alot faster balding than yours it seemed to be a very fast process thanks to what my dad says "Our Strong Balding Genes!" lol. When I first started noticing my balding I had just gotten out of a boot camp, so I just kept with the no guard shave so it wouldn't seem very obvious, that seemed to work for a wile, but eventually it started to recede so thats when I knew I had to do something more with it. So I took the razor to the scalp. Some days I wish I could have hair, but like you said I was no brad pitt.  So for how my body is made I think bald is what gives me the most confidence. You might want to try just buzzing at first until it gets to noticeable, but trust me eventually you'll be like me and want to shave everyday, because bald is alot better than balding.

[WhiskeyHotel]

hey bro. i started losing mine in college with the hairline starting to recede. i shaved it down to a number one then. then at about 25, i started shaving with no guard, and eventually now with a headblade so it's completely shaved.

as far as confidence, it'll take time. while there will always be some girls or people who don't prefer shaved heads, i feel like majority of people don't care. you'll get more compliments than you think too. for every girl that says they want a guy with a full head of hair, there's another that loves the shaved head look, trust me. i've actually had more success with a shaved head.

[TheSlyBear]

for every girl that says they want a guy with a full head of hair, there's another that loves the shaved head look, trust me.

And there are few, if any, that are gonna say "I just love that comb-over look!"

[AvengedSevenfold]

Thanks for these replies so far guys.


I will update you in due course, remember there are a few of us in the same boat and we will all rock a buzz or a shaved head with confidence one day.