urgent , please help

[aarrggh]

C-Mon Jesse , Put up an Avatar , You will get better / proper responses . .   

[deman]

Don't believe those "Just for Men" commercials..... I actually have alot of grey in my beard and I'm 40....and glad to be

[JesseN]

My girl and all our friends think I am only 35 so its important that I look no more than 35. MPB is not helping in that regard but the gray beard is a problem. Don't want all our friends thinking I am an old coot.

[sailor61]

You're on a slippery slope and, bluntly put, you either need to deal with it now or the hole is just going to get deeper.  Let me point out that the beard isn't the only thing to likely be showing grey.....how long do you think you can manage to keep her from noticing that the curtains and the rug don;t match?  And do you want to be even experimenting with dye on/around your junk?

My guess is you're not getting alot of support of here because "sly" is a major step for each one of us accepting who we are and where we are in our lives. It's about not living behind hats, toups, and hair thickeners.   Living a lie with someone you care about is not in that vein.

If she really cares for you a 5 year "misunderstanding" isn't going to matter.  It will come out at some point, better it be from you in a logical manner than when she finds a driver's license, speaks to a relative, finds a diploma, sees a passport or any of the numerous other give ways that are in our daily lives.

I don't mean to come across as harsh but there really is no other way to phrase this.
Good luck, you're going to need it.

[buddha]

My girl and all our friends think I am only 35 so its important that I look no more than 35. MPB is not helping in that regard but the gray beard is a problem. Don't want all our friends thinking I am an old coot.

So you're 39 but your GF thinks you're 35. That only happens one of two ways: 1) she draws the wrong conclusion and you don't correct her. Lie by omission. 2) You knowingly lied about your age, maybe so you could get a "younger" woman. So basically you lied. Now you're stuck in this matter of most grave importance (not). I'm kinda on the same train of thought that Koz is riding on except that I think "spam" is kinda too indirect and vague for what I'm thinking. I've also never had Spam stuck to my shoe.

[CraftyGuy]

My girl and all our friends think I am only 35 so its important that I look no more than 35. MPB is not helping in that regard but the gray beard is a problem. Don't want all our friends thinking I am an old coot.

Not to belittle your feelings on this, but why should it matter?  40 isn't even in the neighborhood of "old coot" - it's barely in the same country.

My (admittedly terse) advice is: suck it up, buttercup!

[deman]

CraftyGuy has it right.....40 is an "old coot"? Get over it and learn your lesson, tell the truth from now on
Besides, I've had some grey in my beard since 34 (if I let it grow out). Dude, your getting older and I've never met anyone who hasn't gotten older

[JesseN]

CraftyGuy has it right.....40 is an "old coot"?

it is to anyone under 40.

[TheSlyBear]

I guess that makes me decrepit. 

You may be approaching 40 my man, but I think you have a bit of growing up to do.

[marshd1000]

As for lying about your age, is that a good foundation to build a relationship on?  Relationships are about trust.  Put yourself in her shoes.  If she finds out about your age without you telling her, she might be wondering what else you are lying about to her?  If you care about her then you will tell the truth.  If she can't handle the minor age difference then is she worth having....unless you are only wanting a roll in the hay!

[xnewyawka]

So you've told us you're nothing but a vain, insecure liar so far Jesse, what else have you got to say?
I agree with buddha, this smacks of sh*t. You've got a lot to learn about life.   

[deman]

it is to anyone under 40.

Jesse, at this point, I believe you are a hopeless mess  Go get some professional help

[D.A.L.U.I.]

Go get some professional help

Frankly, you have a vanity problem not a hairline issue!  Consider the fact that there are many young people, that's younger than 35 if you please, who have serious life threatening medical issues, and when you're compared with them--you're the short end of the stick.  At some point you will come to realize that you don't have problems about birthdays until you run out of them, at whatever age the fates may have decided for you.  Memento mori, sonny boy--memento mori--that ancient imperative of wisdom applies to all ages, even if you deny the number.

[JesseN]

I admit that I can be a bit vain at times but I'm finding it really devastating to watch my good looks fade.  My hair continues to fall out and I'm really going to have to do something about it soon. I wish I had the money for a hair transplant but it looks like I am going to be left with no choice but to shave my head.   Bald.      And my GF's friend who is a hair stylist says that if I'm allergic to J4M then I'll probably have the same reaction to other dye products.  I can't shave it off because of the scar on my chin and because the GF really likes it. The beard, that is, not the scar.  So now I'm faced with the unappealing prospect of being a baldheaded grey-bearded old man at 35. Not that anybody cares. 

[Razor X]

Are those violins I hear?