New and "on the fence"

[legaleagle]

First, I think this is a great site, and it's refreshing to encounter such a positive (and rational) outlook on hairless.  Quite the difference from the usual hair loss forums, on which most people only lament hair loss as effectively ending their lives, and discuss how they devote countless hours to what is most likely a useless regimen and thinking about mpb.

I'm 28 and have experienced general thinning throughout my scalp since I was 22.  It's been relatively easy to just ignore it because I never developed a "bald spot" per se, just thinner hair all over.  Well this fall the strangest thing happened to me.  I was at a state fair throwing baseballs at a "dunk the clown" game, and the clown berated me for my thin hair, remarking how it  would all be gone soon, etc.  Although I was well aware that I had lost significant hair and rarely thought about it, his comments really got to me.  Think about how insane that is for a second; I'm an ivy-league educated lawyer with a job most people would kill for, and I let myself be hurt by the insults of some guy that travels around with the state fair and gets dunked into water.  Talk about irrational.

So that was just a couple of months ago, and now I'm bracing myself to take action one way or another.  I saw a dermatologist and he suggested a regimen of propecia and rogaine, to which I would have to dedicate 9-12 months just to know if it is working.  The other option, of course, is going sly and getting rid of it all.  I know which way you guys come down, but I'm honestly undecided right now.  I'm also considering combining both options, so that I could possibly keep the "stubble look" all over my head, instead of just the back and the sides.

My hair has never been particularly important to my appearance (I never had long, thick hair or anything), and I've also preferred a very short, cropped look.  In fact, I took the plunge entirely about 5 years ago (when I first realized I was losing hair).  I thought my head looked decent that way, but I have two basic deterrents to doing it again (1) back then I knew my hair would grow back almost entirely; now it would grow back thin, unless I did it for a year and then let it grow to see if propecia/rogaine thickened it; and (2) the reaction to my sly head was not particularly favorable, but that was mostly because people simply couldn't understand why I did it, not necessarily because it looked bad.  I have no real concerns about career, people want smart talented lawyers, not lawyers with hair.

Again, this site is fantastic, and has already begun to change my thinking about life after hair.  Any thoughts are greatly appreciated, though I'm sure before long I'll be checking back for head-shaving tips rather than whether to shave in the first place.

[ozzie]

Welcome to the forum, legaleagle. Glad you could join us. Obviously you're on a forum who's denizens will strongly advise you against a chemical "solution" and give you countless reasons why you should not go down that path, but you are obviously performing due diligence on the subject and will arrive at the best decision for you. Best wishes to you! 

[D.A.L.U.I.]

already begun to change my thinking about life after hair.  I'm sure before long I'll be checking back for head-shaving tips rather than whether to shave in the first place.

Your story tells us where you know you need to be.  Do it, keep the 30 day rule, then get on with your life.

[legaleagle]

Thanks guys.  Here is one question I have: I'm irish with relatively pale skin, and while I'm not worried about what that will look like right now, is it inevitable that I will end up with "sun spots" all over my head?  Obviously sunscreen will protect it, but I also don't want the top of my head to be a lighter shade than the rest of my face, and I think it's generally accepted that domes with a little bit of color look better.

[D.A.L.U.I.]

I'm irish with relatively pale skin,

Don't drink while you're shaving!   And the color will even up relatively quickly.  You want to do this, just do it.  Just like a straight shot of good whisky.

[Nonick]

Legaleagle, welcome to the best bald forum on the Internet 
The thing about doing the drugs you mentioned, if you do a little research (not much) you will quickly find out that one of the side-effects of Propecia is that it can permanantly (like as in forever) ruin your sex life; that is of course unless you don't have one and don't plan on ever having one. 
If you do want one down the road, you might consider the "little blue pill" or one of the other similar stimulating drugs.
You see, once you go down that road, there is no stopping; it's just drugs for this and drugs for that.
So, just shave it and be done with it.  If you're concerned about skin color, you can get this great stuff, I think it's Jergens.  Look on the other threads.  The stuff goes on like regular skin cream.  In about 3 days you start to see a gradual darkening of the skin.  It works great!  Trust me on this. 

[Arnie]

Welcome to SBGs!!!

[legaleagle]

Thanks for the welcome.  Obviously I have given this some thought and cognitively I have concluded that going sly is probably the best option.  However, emotionally and psychologically I'm still in the early stages of this, and have not yet come to terms to going without hair forever.  I think the problem is that I am still considering this to be a "loss" rather than a new beginning compelled simply by genetics and not any fault of my own.

Anyway, while I work towards this I thought I would mention my own sly hero, Ken Czubay.  He is one of the most successful businessmen in the country, and is currently overseeing the revitalization of Ford Motor Co.  He has been sly for as long as I've known him (and quite a bit longer than that, I think).  You should definitely do a quick google search and check out his dome and his success.

[Jack21]

I can tell you that I used propecia and rogaine for 8 years and neither stopped or even slowed my hair loss let alone regrew any hair. They did cost me a lot of money.

[D.A.L.U.I.]

have not yet come to terms to going without hair forever. 

Time to get things in their proper order, it's only hair.  Short story--this past Friday we were at a party at a friend's house and ran into a guy I've known since college.  He has every last hair he was born with, no mpb at all.  Friendly, great guy although we've only seen each other occassionally since school.  Talking with him, something wasn't right, his wife was always joining in a conversation at odd points.  Then it dawned on me and a few moments later talking with another old friend my suspicions were confirmed, he's develped Alzheimers.  My god, I only lost hair, he is losing his life.  Losing hair is nothing when seen in the cold hard light of reality--be glad you have a real future without hair.  I'm sure my college friend would trade his hairline in a New York second.  

[Sgt. Pate]

I never realized just how much I was in bondage to my hair until after I shaved it off.  After a couple of years of shaving I grew it back.  It was grief returning to having hair again.  I shaved it off.  The second time was even more convincing for me than the first and I vowed never to have hair again!  

[Ming the Merciless]

Unlike some here, hair or no hair was never high on my list of concerns.  I've got other things much more important to my equanimity, but I can see where the fretters and obsessors come from.  I'm thin, and receding, and white-haired, but don't really care if it has grown out some, or is buzzed, or is shaved.  Frankly, for someone with the thin, white hair I've got, a modest buzz is nearly the same as a shave, with much less fuss over upkeep (two or three weeks between buzzes and then just ignore until the next buzz), as the presence of absence of hair is hard to notice from any modest distance off.  In that, I guess, I'm lucky.  Luck?  Well, that depends on how you view a situation like mine.  Sometimes I like to be slick and smooth and shiny, and grab the razor and lather; other times it's of no interest one way or the other and I let a fuzz appear.  By now, those who have known me for years make no comments pro or con.  They have, and I have, lost interest in the matter.

But as others here have wisely said, it's what you decide is best for you.  AND it's "only hair," and it should not be the focus of your life.  Remember, if you shave and hate, hate, hate it, and yearn for your pre-shave self...just leave the dome alone and it'll come back (whatever was there before... minus, of course, what your genes and time have subtracted in the interval).

[Natedawg]

Welcome to the forums! The replies already given here have you pretty well-covered, but of course, it's a decision that only you can make in the end.
So why not go for it? As others have said, it's only hair. It'll grow back if you really feel being sly is not for you. Make sure you follow the 30 day rule, though. We wouldn't be here trying to convince you to do it again if we weren't so sure there was a good chance you will come to love it for the long term. Don't be a slave to public perception and dead cells growing from your scalp. Good luck!

[sellitman]

Welcome to the site Sir.

I hesitated here about 3 months then one day just said the heck with it. As I shaved a sh*t eating grin appeared on my face in the mirror and I have never looked back. I cannot imagine ever letting mine grow back. My Bozo Ring is a thing of the past!

[Tyler]

legaleagle, welcome to Sly Bald Guys.  We know how hard it is from a psychological aspect; that's why we have the the 30 day rule.  Being a lawyer, you know about rules.  You also know about logic.  Use your logic and follow our 30 day rule. 

I know you said you shaved in the past, but it's obvious that you didn't own it when you did it.  If you follow the 30 day rule you'll learn to own it, just like your mentor did. 

Remember that first time you sat down on your first case or first project?  Remember how nervous you were?  I'm guessing with the success you've had that you over came that nervousness and crushed the project.  You can apply the same thing to shaving your head.  Do it, then crush it!

We're here for you!