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#105 by reb123161 on 04 Nov, 2010 17:12
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Brother, welcome---and enjoy the way of SLY! You have made the right choice. I used to "sleep" in strange ways, as to not "mess up the do" while I was on call. I suppose I didn't sleep well for 20 years over something as trivial as hair loss. FREEDOM and Happiness awaits you, my friend....if you do not enjoy the new you, it is your own fault.
PS.....looking good, man! -
#106 by Mick R on 04 Nov, 2010 20:01
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Even though I regretted getting the Rug
I never had a go at myself because at the time I felt with the information I had it was the best thing for me. I am more annoyed at society for makeing things like baldness a big issue.
So as far as the desicion went do not be to hard on yourself. There are allot of predaters out there trying to suck you in because all they are interested in is themselves and their bank balance
I am the same as far as confidence goes sometimes I feel good sometimes bad sometimes I like it and sometimes I hate it. And I think abou it all the time. But like all things I am hopeing time will heal all my emotional hang ups and I will eventually not even think about it.
And remember what does not kill us MAKES US STRONGER
use this experience to make you a better person
Thanks Mick -
#107 by Jack21 on 04 Nov, 2010 21:10
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I really don't know why so many people around me over the years cared so much about MY hair or the lack thereof. Nonetheless, the fact remains that I gave into all the pressure to conceal my baldness and play a role that wasn't mine to play. I have always been surrounded by very superficial people I suppose. There is nothing I can do about my family, but maybe my taste in friends and gfs could have been better. We tend to gravitate towards people like ourselves. I must have been just as superficial as the rest of them. Image, image, image. That was everything. Even in the army image often trumped substance. We worship at the idol of the youthful and beautiful. Perhaps it all stems from our fear of aging and imminent death. Many cultures have idealized youth over the millenia, but I do not believe that any culture has ever taken it to the ludicrous extent that 21st century N. America and Western Europe have. -
#108 by D.A.L.U.I. on 05 Nov, 2010 06:42
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And remember what does not kill us MAKES US STRONGER
With all due respects to Friedrich Nietzsche, I prefer my cousin's take on it. By way of introduction, she developed severe arthritis in her early thirties and in less than 15 years had numerous surgeries to replace joints frozen as a result of the condition. She soldiers on, and her take is one I think tops Freidrich's, it is:
"What doesn't kill you, sure can piss you off!"
It's a better one by far in my opinion. -
#109 by Mick R on 08 Nov, 2010 02:08
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Good call I like it Saintc
How are things Jack
Mick R -
#110 by BaldWriterBob on 08 Nov, 2010 13:09
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Welcome aboard. Lots of support awaits you here.
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#111 by Jack21 on 08 Nov, 2010 14:13
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I think that I chose a very bad time to make the decision that I did. I knew what the reaction would be (having tried this twice before) and should have just waited until my contract expired. There is nothing I can do now though.Good call I like it Saintc
How are things Jack
Mick R -
#112 by Jack21 on 15 Nov, 2010 20:00
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Ok . Shut up, Jack! People have gotten used to me looking like this. Nobody even seems to care at all anymore. I'm the only one with the issues. This was not a badly timed decision. It was a decision way past due. The rest of the world has embraced me like this and now its time for me to follow suite.
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#113 by J.J. on 15 Nov, 2010 21:20
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The rest of the world has embraced me like this and now its time for me to follow suite.
Hear, hear! -
#114 by Jack21 on 16 Nov, 2010 06:36
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Its kind of amazing. Nobody around me cares at all. There was that initial hock but that has gone. Even my father who called me an f-ing idiot for doing it is in my corner now as well as my mom. Everyone treats me exactly as they did before, I don't exactly have the women chasing after me, but that I know is a matter of confidence. At any rate I have a young son and his well being comes before all else. I have no intention of getting back into the dating game until he is much older - many years from now. -
#115 by xnewyawka on 16 Nov, 2010 07:21
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Hang in there Jack, it's not as bad as it seems, and really should not be such an issue.
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#116 by D.A.L.U.I. on 16 Nov, 2010 07:24
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Its kind of amazing. Nobody around me cares at all. There was that initial hock but that has gone. Even my father who called me an f-ing idiot for doing it is in my corner now as well as my mom. Everyone treats me exactly as they did before, I don't exactly have the women chasing after me, but that I know is a matter of confidence. At any rate I have a young son and his well being comes before all else. I have no intention of getting back into the dating game until he is much older - many years from now.
Well, I've got to say I told you so, less than 30 days ago I posted that basically everything would calm down in thirty days and it has. Now you can get on with your life, you've beaten yourself up enough already. -
#117 by Jack21 on 16 Nov, 2010 08:45
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St.C,
If you had told me on that first day that less than 30 days later nobody would care at all I would never have believed you. It happened though. I'm frankly amazed. That kid who asked to transfer out of my class because she said she couldn't bear the sight of me is back to being just as polite as ever. Nobody's made a joke or asked my why I shaved my head in at least 10 days. Its amazing. People really do adapt fast. Like I said the rest of the world seems to have gotten used to my new look a lot quicker than I have.
The only guy who gives me grief is my best friend Stacey whose had his head shaved since college. He told me I look like a white version of Mario Williams (Mario is not enjoying a lot of support in Houston these days)
Its kind of amazing. Nobody around me cares at all. There was that initial hock but that has gone. Even my father who called me an f-ing idiot for doing it is in my corner now as well as my mom. Everyone treats me exactly as they did before, I don't exactly have the women chasing after me, but that I know is a matter of confidence. At any rate I have a young son and his well being comes before all else. I have no intention of getting back into the dating game until he is much older - many years from now.
Well, I've got to say I told you so, less than 30 days ago I posted that basically everything would calm down in thirty days and it has. Now you can get on with your life, you've beaten yourself up enough already. -
#118 by TheBreeze on 16 Nov, 2010 09:28
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Jack,
As somebody who is taking off the rug too in only in a few weeks, I have been following your story. I'm happy to hear that those around you adjusted so quickly and I have a feeling that you will be right behind them. It was also great to see all the support that you have gotten from all the great guys here. I am not anticipating all that difficult of an adjustment period for those around me or myself, but it has been great to see that even the very tough situations (like yours) are easily conquered with just some time and support. Keep pushing forward. -
#119 by Jack21 on 16 Nov, 2010 10:29
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Man, these guys really got me through the first couple of weeks. I had practically ZERO support outside of this site. As I've said the people around me have really gotten used to my looking this way. I'm still the one having a bit of a hard time. I'm not crying in the corner, but when I look in the mirror I cringe a little. Time and support are definitely key. The positives to yanking the rug are too many to enumerate. Being able to have a real work out and really sweat is amazing. Being able to take a REAL shower and actually feel clean is bliss. Sleeping is a million times more comfortable. I can jog in the blazing Houston sun and not have to worry about my damn rug and all the glue and tape. You'll most probably also look a lot better. Most pieces are pieces of crap and can be spotted a mile away. Some are good. Mine was. I paid more for high end hair pieces than for rent. I still thought it looked like crap and totally fake but it still takes getting used to. I do have a strong sense though that a month from now I'll have completely forgotten about the whole rug thing and embraced my baldness completely. The world around me has. Now its time for me
Jack,
As somebody who is taking off the rug too in only in a few weeks, I have been following your story. I'm happy to hear that those around you adjusted so quickly and I have a feeling that you will be right behind them. It was also great to see all the support that you have gotten from all the great guys here. I am not anticipating all that difficult of an adjustment period for those around me or myself, but it has been great to see that even the very tough situations (like yours) are easily conquered with just some time and support. Keep pushing forward.