Well, let me say at the outset that my wife has never, I mean never, "accepted" my decision to shave away a dying mop--aka combover. She has learned to live with the almost constant compliments I get from her friends and people she respects. My guess on her refusal is that for her I'm still supposed to look like the guy she married over 35 years ago. Even at that time I recently learned one of my best friends, he's my oldest child's godfather, had noticed my "hole".
I refused to deal with this, even though I have to say I knew it had to come and frankly I thought the look was good even if not compared to a rim-job.
So, how do you deal with it? Recognize that she isn't living in your skin 24/7, notwithstanding the wedding vows. Remember also as has been pointed out several times here, that she probably never asks you before she changes her hair style or even color--that's for her to decide, and rightfully so. Obviously your choice of hair or non-hair style is yours also.
For my part, I asked forgiveness (and never got it) not permission. It was rough, I can't minimize that. I would be very happy if she could finally embrace it--but whether she does or not, I'm not going back to a combover, and doubt I could get one going today that would even look as "good" as Pat Buchannan's
. And I still love the look on her face when her friends come up, give me a head rub and say how good it looks--priceless. And when someone comes up and tells me that notwithstanding my wife's request that they not encourage me, they also think it looks good--well, it's just great. The hair part of my life, yours and many others is over. Don't get caught in the rain w/ a bad looking combover looking like a drown rat. This is one you do for yourself, and for somethings that's just how it is, it doesn't reflect on your love and respect for your wife, it's only about living and looking as good as you can in your own opinion. This is all about you, and living with yourself and your appearance. Does you're wife stand w/ you every morning while you try to make something of what's left, no. Rumplestiltskin couldn't do it and neither can you. Shave it, enjoy it-it's great it's freedom, as you know from your previous experience.