Examples of building confidence - page 1 -

• Examples of building confidence by Tyler on 13 Jan, 2010 16:37
• To help the guys out that come here looking to build confidence, can you share a method or experience that you've had that helps or helped you build confidence?
  
  
  I'll start. 
  
  For me, stepping out of my comfort zone and achieving just a small task while I'm outside of my comfort zone allows me to build confidence in small steps.  For example, it may be that I need to get in-front of a potential client.  I'll start off by making the first call.  This simple action alone can break the nervousness of moving forward with that client.
• #1 by Mikekoz13 on 13 Jan, 2010 18:36
• My old baseball Coach had a saying he used often when I was playing Pony Ball as a teen.
  
  "If you want to be a baseball player, you need to look like a baseball player."
  
  SLY translation : "If you want to be confident, you need to look and feel confident".
  
  At first it will seem like a bit of an act.... and that will be OK.....  because your confidence WILL grow.
• #2 by ozzie on 13 Jan, 2010 19:50
• VISUALIZATION - Still underutilized by most folks, but an incredibly powerful and proven method of building confidence and enhancing performance in ANY field of endeavor. When I'm stressing about an upcoming event of some sort, I try to remember to do this:
  
  As I lie in bed just prior to sleep, I visualize myself performing, to perfection, the following day's (or week's) challenge. I visualize how others will respond positively to my performance as well.
  
  As a confidence builder, this absolutely works. Be it a sporting, business or social engagement where I really need to be on top of my game, the power of visualization has helped me immensely.
• #3 by Tyler on 14 Jan, 2010 10:29
• Visualization is huge!  I used to find that if I had a dream of how I was going to play in my racquetball tournament the day before, or took time to visualize it, I would never lose.  I would be so focused during the match and usually do things that I didn't even know I could do. 
• #4 by buddha on 14 Jan, 2010 11:48
• "I'll quit this job TOMORROW!"
  Experience, IMO, is the greatest confidence builder in my repertoire.
  Outside my 20 years on the force I have had a number of jobs, some I liked and some I hated. I always wanted to quit the ones I hated. My old man told me once to try to think "I'll quit this job tomorrow". If I said that then usually by the end of the day I would calm down and be ready by the next day. Each subsequent day I worked gave me more experience and with experience came confidence.
• #5 by Petrik on 28 Jan, 2010 13:51
• For me system of achieving goals worked. I started to do this method after I lost weight when I was 18 (77 lbs) After this I started to have an idea that you really can achieve most of what you want by focusing on it. At first I was tellling myself I can do anything I want (just to boost myself:) but havent fully believe it back then. But I wanted to give it a try. Then I asked myself what is it I would like to achieve and did it. It is fun because you always have something to look forward and when you are finished you made it and it counts forever:)
• #6 by Baldie Locks on 13 Feb, 2010 22:11
• I have a condition called alopecia, which means that my body is, so to say, allergic to my hair. But anyways, i love being bald. but when it comes to "being bald in front of other people", im not a fan. I always make jokes about my self, and so do my friends, but i get embarrassed when "strangers" see me without my hat on. I usually always wear my hat, but every once in a while, people that i dont know will see me with it off.
  
  But overall, i love being bald.
  Alot.
  And i just became a member of this website like 4 minutes ago, and i just want to say, it is probably to best thing i have ever seen on the internet. 
• #7 by Tyler on 13 Feb, 2010 23:57
• Baldie Locks, I understand how it feels to be "different" to those in public.  I have two huge scars, one on my chest and one along my ribs due to surgeries before the age of 12.  I grew up in an area where we spent a lot of time with our shirts off during the summer because it was so hot.  We'd often be at the lake, the public swimming pool, or the water slides.  It never feels good to hear strangers talk about you, but it appears that you are learning that these types of challenges will make you stronger in the long run. 
  
  I went to college with a guy that has alopecia and he rocked the look, mostly because he was comfortable with who he is.
  
  Welcome to Sly Bald Guys!  We're glad you found us!
• #8 by Arnie on 14 Feb, 2010 12:10
• For me, going SLY added confidence...
  
  Trying to save my few strands of hair left and pushing it to a mythilogical limit in my head was what took from my confidence...
  
  I know this doesn't apply for those BBC...but for those with the receding hairline...
  
  ...who gets the most jokes/criticism-even though it doesn't matter?  Not the SLY guys...
• #9 by Baldie Locks on 14 Feb, 2010 13:06
• Thank You Tyler
• #10 by hammerdrill376 on 14 Feb, 2010 14:56
• One thing that helps me be a more confident person each day is what I do before the day begins. For about 20 minutes or so I have an appointment with myself and with God. I don't mean in a "religous" sort of day but more in meditation, prayer and reminding myself of the I AM part of me. Recently I began studying several books by Ernest Holmes who founded Science of Mind and Charles Filmore who started the Unity Church. Amazing to read what was written on visualization and affirmations during the late 19th and early 20th centuries.  I can tell if I miss an appointment (usually just want to stay in bed a few moments more) I find my day does not run as smooth.
• #11 by benmcd on 14 Feb, 2010 15:57
• On this subject, I have found it beneficial to put myself in challenging situations. I'm certainly not trying to make my life harder, but sometimes taking the rocky road will take you to the better place. My example is addressing large groups of people, I hated it but my job requires that I do it daily, I'm now comfortable with it and i am now in a new place with this small part of life. What doesn't kill you makes you stronger. 
• #12 by Robmeister on 14 Feb, 2010 19:42
• Read "As A Man Thinketh" by James Allen
  
  and
  
  "Think and Grow Rich" by Napoleon Hill.
  
  Two classics.  I'm on my second read-through on TAGR and like my 5th or 6th read-through on AAMT.
  
  As A Man Thinketh is a very short book, almost like a pamphlet.  Can be read in one sitting, but MAN is it packed!!!
• #13 by frostedperspeks on 20 Feb, 2010 18:18
•  I always make jokes about my self, and so do my friends, but i get embarrassed when "strangers" see me without my hat on. I usually always wear my hat, but every once in a while, people that i dont know will see me with it off.
  
  [/quote]
  
  When i was in the height of suffering from an anxiety disorder, i used to wear hats constantly. I physically couldn't deal with people looking at me without a hat on. When i started losing my hair i went through a similar phase but only for a few days. When i started losing hair i started getting hyper paranoid again about how people percieved me. After i started losing my hairline i started to realise, if anyone judges you purely on how much hair you have, that says a lot about them as a person.
  Don't let them bring you down. For a start a bald head looks great and dont let anyone tell you otherwise, and if anyone wants to poke at you because you have an awesome shaved head, well that says alot about their personality!
  
  one song that really helped me along the road is
  
  
  
  Might not be everyones cup of tea, but the i found the lyrics really inspiring!
  
  
  
• #14 by usmcpelon on 21 Feb, 2010 07:41
• Well guys I m not going bald, but I got used to being bald and I love it.   However, I do have a problem when it comes to being out in the open with alot of people, and there isn't a single bald guy around.  I stand out and people just stare at me.  My ears get hot and tuich like crazy because I know people are staring at me from behind.  I have no problem at work since all are bald.  I had to change my church schedule since I was the only bald guy at the 9:30 service to the 10:45 on sunday were there are 7 older bald guys and 5:30 on Saturday were there are 11 bald guys.  And thats were I feel confident and right at home.  It's funny how bald guys look and relate to each other becuase were are bald.  We smile and shake hands as if we've known each other for sometime. No the same with long haired guys.  When I met with clients, I get all embarrassed when they ask me about the shaved head.  And I'm not talking about meeting with one or two people.  No, I mean about 10 or 15 people at one time.  I just try to downplay the stituation, but it doesn't go away until I give them an answer.  Ofcourse the lady's have a field trip, they enjoy it and love it too. Has anyone of you had this problem and can you give me some advice on how to overcome this situation.  I really need the cofidence to be in public without feeling out of place and the confidence to full accept the bald look that I love and want to keep.  It's getting difficult sometime that I have felt the need to quit my job and let my hair grow out.