Author Topic: Man Rules!  (Read 4337 times)

Offline Timmay

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Man Rules!
« on: April 12, 2008, 10:32:28 AM »
The Man's Rules­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­

We always hear ' the rules '
From the female side.   
  Now here are the rules from the male side.   

These are our rules!
Please note.. these are all numbered '1 '
ON PURPOSE! 
 
1.   Men are NOT mind readers.

1. Learn to work the toilet seat.
You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down.
We need it up, you need it down.
You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.

1. Sunday sports : It's like the full moon
or the changing of the tides.
Let it be.

1. Crying is blackmail.

1. Ask for what you want.
Let us be clear on this one:
Subtle hints do not work!
Strong hints do not work!
Obvious hints do not work!
Just say it!

1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.

1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do.
Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.


1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.
In fact, all comments become Null and void after 7 Days.


1. If you think you're fat, you probably are.
Don't ask us.

1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the   other one

1. You ca n either ask us to do something
Or tell us how you want it done.
Not both.
If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.

1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during commercials..

1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.

1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.
Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.

1. If we ask what is wrong and you say 'nothing,' We will act like nothing's wrong.
We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.

1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer you don't want to hear.

1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine... Really .

1. You have enough clothes.

1. You have too many shoes.

1. I am in shape.   Round IS a shape!

1. Thank you for reading this..
Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;


But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.



Offline SLYinKC

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Re: Man Rules!
« Reply #1 on: April 12, 2008, 12:16:22 PM »
Good one Timmy.  I can relate to alot of those.    :*))
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Offline PBurke

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Re: Man Rules!
« Reply #2 on: April 12, 2008, 03:44:44 PM »
holy crap!   timmay made sense. ha ha ha j/k bro. that is a good one


Treat people with respect, or just ignore them!

Offline nomad

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Re: Man Rules!
« Reply #3 on: April 12, 2008, 05:29:48 PM »
now if we could get all the females to understand these rules there might just be peace on earth.........ya right?!?! :*)) :*)) :*)) :*)) :*)) :*)) :*)) :*))
 

Offline Jim80

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Re: Man Rules!
« Reply #4 on: April 12, 2008, 07:46:03 PM »
Timmay I absolutly love #1
that list is hilarious

JohnMont

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Re: Man Rules!
« Reply #5 on: April 12, 2008, 08:38:27 PM »
The Man's Rules­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­


1. Learn to work the toilet seat.
You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down.
We need it up, you need it down.
You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.

RIGHT ON !  This has always been a sore spot with me.  Like, how come THEY can't adjust the seat once in a while ?


1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.
Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.

Uhh..  actually; I DO know what mauve is .....


Offline warhawk

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Re: Man Rules!
« Reply #6 on: April 12, 2008, 09:20:07 PM »
timmy:  i most definitely can relate 2 that list. :*)) O0 O0 O0

WARHAWK O0
Tough times don't last but tough people do!!!


Offline Timmay

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Re: Man Rules!
« Reply #7 on: April 12, 2008, 09:56:28 PM »
Timmay I absolutly love #1
that list is hilarious

Which #1....they are all #1 LOL..

Timmay

Offline Scott

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Re: Man Rules!
« Reply #8 on: April 13, 2008, 02:26:02 AM »
Priceless Timmay!  Good job.

Offline buddha

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Re: Man Rules!
« Reply #9 on: April 13, 2008, 03:33:57 PM »
Timmay for President!
"Certainly there is no hunting like the hunting of man and those who have hunted armed men long enough and liked it never really care for anything else thereafter."
Ernest Hemingway, On The Blue Water.

Offline Timmay

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Re: Man Rules!
« Reply #10 on: April 13, 2008, 08:27:39 PM »
Timmay for President!


And you think we have problems NOW?  ....geeze...remember im a person who doesnt give a sheet!