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Feeling a bit disappointed by the lack of positive comments...
by
ben9792
on 15 Oct, 2014 12:51
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So I shaved my head a few weeks ago. Not quite sly, but as close as can be with a head shaver and not a razor...
I wasn't expecting everyone to suddenly start telling me how handsome I am, I know I'm not that great looking! I thought I looked far better which is the most important thing, but I was kind of hoping to have had some positive comments by now.
Most of the older women have said "what have you done that to your hair for!", and one said "You should enjoy it while you still have it!". Most men have said my timing wasnt great with the weather getting cold, or asked what Ive "done that for".
A young girl my girlfriend baby sits said she liked my new hairstyle, and a work colleague agreed when I said I liked it, he said "yeah now I'm used to it it's alright".
I guess as I was so depressed when my hair was thinning, and focused so much on how terrible it looked, and when I shaved it was so relieved and loved it I was hoping other people would feel the same. I guess it proves people probably werent paying that much attention to my hair before! I feel a bit silly for getting so hung up on it now actually!
I wouldnt go back though, I prefer it shaved, and will go sly eventually!
Anybody else had similar experiences? or the opposite, when you thought it looked awful but other people loved it?
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#1
by
Sir Harry
on 15 Oct, 2014 13:01
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Prior to April 2008 (my last non-sly haircut was for Easter in late March of that same year), I had shaved my head maybe five or six times per year....Basically, I went one month sly, the next month with a close cut fade....I liked being sly, especially for weekend drills with the National Guard, but for some reason, my older male relatives with horseshoes and donut holes didn't care for it. In a way, the more negative responses I got, the more it emboldened me to go sly. After I shaved my head for good in April 2008, so many people, including some extended family members, were going around with shaved heads, it was almost a non issue. (No offense here to anyone on the board, and this is NOT to be racist in any way, but it seems for the most part that when African American males go sly, no one really cares, it's just that it was somewhat of a problem when fair skinned males and most females go sly). Thankfully, this is 2014, when as long as people themselves feel good about being sly, everything and everyone else doesn't matter. As long as YOU are happy with your new look, and others see it, I wouldn't worry about any positive or adverse comments.
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#2
by
ben9792
on 15 Oct, 2014 13:16
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Funny you mention the older guys in you're family didnt care for it... Most/all of the men who have commented have had the horseshoe, severely receding hairline, or a combover! Maybe it's a bit of jealously that I was confident enough to just go for it, when theyve just held on for many years?
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#3
by
Sir Harry
on 15 Oct, 2014 13:34
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Funny you mention the older guys in you're family didnt care for it... Most/all of the men who have commented have had the horseshoe, severely receding hairline, or a combover! Maybe it's a bit of jealously that I was confident enough to just go for it, when theyve just held on for many years?
Could be, my friend, could be...
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#4
by
geeman
on 15 Oct, 2014 16:24
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yep... probably good old insecurity crossed with jealousy, it's funny how family and close friends feel the need to comment... even negatively... only one family member was rude.... I let it go the first time... but after he said it all again.... I took him aside and asked why he thought he had the right to be constantly rude? and did I ever tell him how fat he was, or how badly dressed he looked?..... he got the point and it's all good....
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#5
by
gwsmallwood
on 15 Oct, 2014 16:33
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A young girl my girlfriend baby sits said she liked my new hairstyle
Trust the kid. They have great intuition, and not much in the way of the societal biases.
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#6
by
AJ Q-Ball
on 15 Oct, 2014 17:25
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You might want to try shaving it clean bald with the razor and shaving cream. For me, there was a noticeable difference between zero guard on the clippers and clean shaved. I looked unclean and unkempt with just buzzing my head with no guard on the clippers but I looked like a true professional once I took the razor to it.
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#7
by
Frontier Guy
on 15 Oct, 2014 18:21
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Seriously, does it really matter what other people think?
Honestly, how do YOU feel not having to worry about thinning hair and trying to "arrange" it to hide reality.
Don't give the power to other people's comments to control your feelings about yourself.
Relax, enjoy and move on. There is SO much more to living a joyful life than a haircut.
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#8
by
Cave Dweller
on 15 Oct, 2014 18:39
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I guess it proves people probably werent paying that much attention to my hair before!
I have been saying that on this board ever since I joined. The man losing the hair usually notices it and worries about it to extremes when almost everyone really doesn't care.
I wouldnt go back though, I prefer it shaved, and will go sly eventually!
And that ultimately is all that matters. For some reason family members tend to react negatively to any change a man makes to his hairstyle. It took my mom almost a year to accept that I was not going to grow back the horseshoe. If you are happy with the look, however, most people will stop noticing it or making comments once they get over the initial surprise. Most of the reactions I received can be summarized as indifference.
Congratulations on doing what made you feel good, sir.
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#9
by
Razorhead
on 15 Oct, 2014 21:22
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You might want to try shaving it clean bald with the razor and shaving cream. For me, there was a noticeable difference between zero guard on the clippers and clean shaved. I looked unclean and unkempt with just buzzing my head with no guard on the clippers but I looked like a true professional once I took the razor to it.
Might be truth to that. I never got compliments with a buzzcut or a clippershave. But once I took a razor to my head, I got compliments. A shaved head is a statement. My clippershaves just showed off how silvery my hair got and looked scruffy. Plus my family had a positive reaction to my shaved head. They hated the clippershaves. Who knows why they reacted that way. I love it shaved and that's all that matters.
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#10
by
mrzed
on 16 Oct, 2014 02:59
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When I first shaved my head there were very few comments.
Now, the guys in the office joke about it, but we have an agreement. It's not mean joking. We just have fun with it. I also carry Sly Bald Guy business cards with me so if anyone pushes too much, I offer them a card.
It actually took my daughters (who live at home with me) several days to notice that I had shaved my head.
They are all used to it now and think nothing of it.
Same way with my earring.
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#11
by
tobler1
on 16 Oct, 2014 03:53
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If you enjoy the look, that is really all that matters at the end of the day. I didn't start shaving my head because I expected compliments. I did it for me, and I'm very content with that.
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#12
by
TheSlyBear
on 16 Oct, 2014 09:11
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People, especially older, are taken aback by sudden change. I'm suspecting a lot of the reaction is simply initial. Do not be surprised if later on, you get more of "You know... that really does look good on you."