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Author Topic: Premature MalePatternBald (MPB)  (Read 3488 times)

Offline stasiu

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Premature MalePatternBald (MPB)
« on: September 08, 2013, 11:26:01 AM »
For those of us who went premature MPB in the early-mid 1970's, life was not easy.  No internet.  No SBG !  So ... I thought I'd list a few "take five to laugh" jokes for those premature MPB guys who visit here in 2013:

It's my first five year class reunion as I stand at the bar having a drink when the basketball jock (who is 6"3' and I'm 5"6') comes up and rubs the top of my head and says "Damn ... you made some plumber a rich SOB cleaning your shower drain".  To which I replied "And now he's my husband ...."

I'm standing in line and the guy in front of me has thick flowing black hair on the sides and back which is neatly combed back while the strands on top pull away from his bald patch crown.  I take a can of black non-gloss spray can and gently go over his top.  The lady behind me complains that I am "killing the ozone".  I tell her "nah ... just the bald patch glare". 

So I key in my four digit password and the gates open wide.  There sits St. Peter's assistant watching 10 monitors.  He looks up and asks for my SSN.  When my profile shows he then looks at the screen and at me and says "this profile shows hair and no wrinkles".  I replied "that was taken before my journey began finding this place".
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isleepinthebuff

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Re: Premature MalePatternBald (MPB)
« Reply #1 on: September 08, 2013, 01:18:34 PM »
It's easy to forget what life was like without the worldwideweb. I wonder what my teen years would have been like if I had had access to it
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Offline g_bald

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Re: Premature MalePatternBald (MPB)
« Reply #2 on: September 09, 2013, 09:01:18 AM »
Life BEFORE the Internet??? The horror!! The HORROR!!! LOL  >:D

I remember LBtI (Life Before the Internet) VERY well. When I had to go to a "library" to "look up things," and having to write "letters" to relatives who didn't live nearby. And yes, the phone and TV both had a "rotary dial" as well.

Had I had access to such things, I am sure I would have felt a lot different about me than I did.

Still, fun to look back in time and remember the days when we lived in caves and the world was in black & white...  :*))
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isleepinthebuff

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Re: Premature MalePatternBald (MPB)
« Reply #3 on: September 09, 2013, 12:59:31 PM »
Quote from: g_bald on September 09, 2013, 09:01:18 AM
Life BEFORE the Internet??? The horror!! The HORROR!!! LOL  >:D

I remember LBtI (Life Before the Internet) VERY well. When I had to go to a "library" to "look up things," and having to write "letters" to relatives who didn't live nearby. And yes, the phone and TV both had a "rotary dial" as well.

Had I had access to such things, I am sure I would have felt a lot different about me than I did.

Still, fun to look back in time and remember the days when we lived in caves and the world was in black & white...  :*))

I remember getting our first colour TV - it was amazing!!

And our first phone, mum got a plush seat and placed it in the hallway. Why anyone would want a seat in the hallway and not in the lounge I have no idea
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Offline Cave Dweller

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Re: Premature MalePatternBald (MPB)
« Reply #4 on: September 09, 2013, 07:13:18 PM »
Quote from: Slyest on September 09, 2013, 12:59:31 PM
And our first phone, mum got a plush seat and placed it in the hallway.
I had a great aunt who up until she died a few years ago still had her old, hard rubber rotary dial phone hard wired in the hall vestibule. She never thought it was important enough to take it out.  Man, those things had loud bells.

Even as a kid, I never understood why phones were intentionally placed in hallways.

My parents did not break down and get touch tone phones until 1993 when they moved and discovered the phone company no longer rented phones.
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Offline wpruitt

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Re: Premature MalePatternBald (MPB)
« Reply #5 on: September 10, 2013, 11:48:31 AM »
Quote from: Cave Dweller on September 09, 2013, 07:13:18 PM
Quote from: Slyest on September 09, 2013, 12:59:31 PM
And our first phone, mum got a plush seat and placed it in the hallway.
I had a great aunt who up until she died a few years ago still had her old, hard rubber rotary dial phone hard wired in the hall vestibule. She never thought it was important enough to take it out.  Man, those things had loud bells.

Even as a kid, I never understood why phones were intentionally placed in hallways.

My parents did not break down and get touch tone phones until 1993 when they moved and discovered the phone company no longer rented phones.
My house still has the wood Western Electric (circa 1900) phones mounted on the wall.  While you can no longer dial out on it, since Sarah no longer sits behind the switchboard at Central, it still has capabilities to pick up and listen.  You can't talk over it since the battery is dead and they no longer make them.
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