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Thank you by lifehappens23 on 08 Mar, 2010 23:25
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First off I want to say thank you.
I am 22 years old and balding. I realized my hairline wasn't normal at 19. About a year ago I realized I was losing some in the back. A month back I shaved it to a 1/4 of a inch. So no, I'm not sly yet. After shaving I realized it was diffuse balding. When I first shaved it I got mixed responses. One guy said why'd you shave your head? One guy looked at me and said it looks good on me and I pull it off(I'm closer to him than the first guy so that helped) then a girl looked at me and asked if I liked it, as if she was waiting for my response to see what I'd say(I could tell she didn't like it, which sucks cause she's one of those girls I've had a thing for for years but know were too good of friends for anything to happen). About a week ago one of my best friends and I were drinkin and I pissed him off and he said "d*amnit you bald mother f*cker"...that hurt...I don't know if he said it because I'm balding or because he's just never seen me with a shaved head but it did feel weird and I didn't know what too think. I know I'm balding but it's at that stage where I feel like only someones who's balding would notice.
So that brings me to the conclusion. I'm going bald. I plan to keep shaving it closer and closer until I'm bic'in it (altough I'll prolly use a headblade). It upsets me. I'm not trying to be cocky but I feel I was a good looking guy. I feel good looking people look good whether they have hair or not. I feel like I can pull off the sly look. My main problem is I feel I have a good body for a sly look, as I lift a lot of weights, but my head is mishappen. To sum it up, I have somewhat of a butthead, I don't know how else to explain it, other than death valley is on my head. I know it's not nearly as bad as I think but it bothers me.
The main point of this is I want to say thank you. I used to be on some other hairloss forum talking about ways to stop hairloss, but I'm more willing to accept what's happening than trying to stop it. I feel like this site is full of real men, because a real man isn't always happy about what happens, but they except it and make the best of it, and damnit that's what I plan to do. So from the bottom of my heart thank you. I'm not the happiest about this but I want to be a man and take it on the chin. -
#1 by ozzie on 08 Mar, 2010 23:34
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Congratulations! You've arrived at a critical point: Acceptance. And you are smart enough to see through the B.S. on other forums and realize that the best possible course of action is to go Sly. You don't feel real happy about it right at the moment and that is completely understandable, but keep going .... buzz it down a bit more .... or go balls out and shave that sh*t off! Don't worry about the girls. Ask anyone here ... cool chicks dig the sly look!
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#2 by raven on 08 Mar, 2010 23:35
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Hi Mate,
Looks like you and me have a similar story.....I used to consider myself a great looking guy but I have been plagued with insecurity since i noticed my hair was thinning dramatically in the last few months......I think it takes considerable strength to accept that we are going bald, that it does not define us and then to go out in the world and play the game as best as we can.
I am buzz cutting my hair down very short 6mm or 3mm this sunday in a first step to help me deal with my hairloss and move forward.....stay strong brother, its not the end of the world
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#3 by raven on 08 Mar, 2010 23:36
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Hello by the way ozzie, good to see another Australian on here
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#4 by lifehappens23 on 08 Mar, 2010 23:45
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Thank you, both of you two. It's not what I want but I think about kids who are going bald because of chemo, and you know what, all in all I have a wonderful life and I'm going to be happy with it. Heck I just had a friend(with long flowing dreads) who hit a tree snowboarding and passed, and you know what, there's worse in life than losing hair. I maybe losing hair but I'm not losing me.
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#5 by ozzie on 08 Mar, 2010 23:51
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Hello by the way ozzie, good to see another Australian on here
Right on, raven. There's a few Bald Wonders from Down Under on the forum. You're in good company mate.Thank you, both of you two. It's not what I want but I think about kids who are going bald because of chemo, and you know what, all in all I have a wonderful life and I'm going to be happy with it. Heck I just had a friend(with long flowing dreads) who hit a tree snowboarding and passed, and you know what, there's worse in life than losing hair. I maybe losing hair but I'm not losing me.
No worries, lh23! You're certainly not losing you ... you're actually finding your real self, released from all that angst and uncertainty. I'm excited for you. Good luck! -
#6 by lifehappens23 on 09 Mar, 2010 00:04
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Thank you ozzie, that's the most important part to me, not losing me. It's not ideal, no, but it's happening, and I'd rather accept it than spending $$$$'s trying to stop what I can't. I'd rather focus on what I like about me than what I want to change.
I'm balding....whatever...I'm still me....and you know what??? I think I'll pull it off, and LIKE IT. -
#7 by ozzie on 09 Mar, 2010 00:17
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#8 by D.A.L.U.I. on 09 Mar, 2010 09:25
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So it's going to happen, it's not a disease--it's a genetic trait. By the time guys reach 30, 30% will have mpb issues, at 50, it's 50%. There's a trend here, you're just early in line. If you're fit, then a shaved head looks great--and thinning hair on any shaped melon isn't a positive. Ditch the hair, work on the smile and an open personality. Stick w/ it thirty days and you'll be home. Trust us on this one. Post up, we'll be honest, but I haven't ever seen someone who had mpb that wasn't improved by shaving, not one. Why would you be different?
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#9 by Tyler on 09 Mar, 2010 09:51
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lh23, you're welcome! I'm glad you found us and that we could help you out. Stick around and we'll help you become more confident than ever in your own skin.
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#10 by Arnie on 09 Mar, 2010 15:44
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You've found a great place for great advice...welcome to SBGs!!!
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#11 by Mikekoz13 on 09 Mar, 2010 18:18
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Thank you, both of you two. It's not what I want but I think about kids who are going bald because of chemo, and you know what, all in all I have a wonderful life and I'm going to be happy with it. Heck I just had a friend(with long flowing dreads) who hit a tree snowboarding and passed, and you know what, there's worse in life than losing hair. I maybe losing hair but I'm not losing me.
This is an awesome statement! You've got it figured out my Friend!
Welcome to the Forum! Keep that great attitude, and stay around here and spread that cheer. -
#12 by 440satellite on 09 Mar, 2010 18:56
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Great posts lh23! As for your friends comment, I got a lot of 'hey baldie' and similar to what your friend said after I first went sly. Still get some here and there. If your friends are anything like mine that was just their way of dealing with the change. Some got it while others took a bit to come to terms.
Being strong and making a bold change to better yourself makes some people uncomfortable until they readjust their perspective and the new becomes the old standard.
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#13 by pdxtodd on 09 Mar, 2010 19:15
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Hey lh23 welcome to the group. Like so many before you - we've all been in your shoes and finally made the decision to take control. Once you take that final step you'll kick yourself for not doing it sooner. As a guy who's twice your age (actually more than twice but who's counting) - I can tell you that I only wish I would have taken care of things at your age instead of waiting until I was 52. All those years of pain, agony, lotions, potions, drugs, rugs, and insecurity were all wasted on something as stupid as hair.
As for friends making fun of you or commenting -- its all a matter of attitude. I wear my dome proud and nobody says anything other than positive things about it. And as for women -- the ones who love bald heads are the ones that you want. They know the power of sly. I've had more women over the past 3 months walk up out of the blue and either ask if they could rub my head or comment on how sexy bald men are to them - than I ever had do the same thing when I had hair. If I only knew then what I know now I would have done it decades ago!
So take control - stand tall - be proud and you'll be amazed at the transformation. -
#14 by OzPete on 09 Mar, 2010 19:47
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Welcome to SBG!