Sly Bald Guys Forum
Discussions About Being Bald => Reactions to being Bald => Topic started by: Sean25 on January 04, 2009, 10:14:36 PM
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These are 2 pictures i have on my computer and as you can tell my hairline has gone south and you can't tell but the crown is thinning too. My hair in my profile picture is the shortest i have ever had it. To add to this, it's only been about 5 months since i could even notice some hair loss. Now only a short couple of months later you can tell i'm losing my hair the second you look at me. Before this I never had a problem dating women and now none of them want anything to do with me. My confidence is shot but i don't show it when i approach a woman but they don't seem to give me the chance to show them anything but my balding head. I'm usually not one to complain or sound pathetic but you should see the looks they give me when I approach them. Some even have even gone as far as to make a comment like "why would i want to date a 20 year old who's going bald?" That is a direct quote. By the time i'm 21 in 6 months, i think im gonna be pretty bald. My guy friends laugh and every time i see them i'm the punchline for some bald joke. It's mostly in fun but my confidence is so extremely low right now that it's getting to me. I even stayed in on new years because of these reactions i've gotten in the last couple months. I had a positive attitude about all of this in the beginning because of this site but not only has it not gotten any better, it's gotten worse. Have any of you guys gotten it this bad or do i just live in a shallow community?
(https://www.slybaldguys.com/smf/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fphotos-a.ak.fbcdn.net%2Fphotos-ak-sf2p%2Fv54%2F1%2F70%2F82702670%2Fn82702670_30167496_5616.jpg&hash=272550a5642342ea804c72ead0042ad8c7da4cc2)
These pics are 1 year apart
(https://www.slybaldguys.com/smf/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fphotos-b.ak.fbcdn.net%2Fphotos-ak-snc1%2Fv1973%2F39%2F66%2F185600044%2Fn185600044_30031825_1074.jpg&hash=d4427005841c1855605cac400e55c72f0be4a21b)
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Looks like a candidate for slydom!!!
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Shave it and your problems are solved.
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look at my hairline in my avatar. im 20 and its by FAAAAAAAAAAR worse than yours. i have a thin lil strip in the front prolly 1 inch wide and 2.5 inches long. its sad.
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It must be a shallow community because you're a good looking guy. You may find it a lot different if you shave completely and stick with it for 30 days. You probably think that it may not seem like much of a difference until you actually try it. And also, any girl who would say that is someone you should avoid like the plague. There are no guarantees in life, and you don't want to fall in love and marry (down the road) someone who would drop you because your physical appearance changes and no longer fits some image she has of 'the perfect man.' We're here for you, bro.
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Dude, these guys who are making you the punchline for bald jokes are insecure. I agree that you are surrounded by shallow people.
I remember Razor mentioning something in another thread that people from your past have subconscious expectations of how you SHOULD look. When your look changes, it takes time for others to get used to it. The comments from others will end soon enough. As for the girl that said that ridiculous comment - she will live a long, fake-boob filled life, with a hair-plugged douchebag. sounds like fun! O0
Remind yourself that you are doing what's best for you. I honestly think you will look awesome with the sly look.
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sorry to hear you are having a bad time with it dude, by like the guys said, shave it and enjoy the confidence that comes as a reward!!
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Seriously..
shave it bald..smooth with no stubble..you're a good lookin' dude and it will look good on you...
trust us, your problem will be solved!
You're too young to be hatin' life!
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i know what ya going through! and the shallow-brained stuff is really annoying sometimes.
somtimes it seems like people don't know where to stop, but anyways.
young age or not. it's pretty obvious that you have hairloss and just wanna give this advice.
be aware of that, you can't change it! try to find a way to arrange with that. the faster he better.
the better you can counter the shallow community.
to think too much about is wasted time. i thought too much about it and that wasn't/ isn't good.
life is too short. (... to be not sly ;D)
what ever you decide to do, shaving, buzzing, just make sure your feel comfortable.
i think a shaved head would suit ya.
otherwise your hair a strong and thick, with a longer haircut it wouldn't be so noticeable at this point.
just a thought! (as long as there is enough on top ;) ) nothing for bad O0
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The bros have given you some good advice. Shave it for at least 30 days and I bet you will find out that your confidence will slowly return. !! O0
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Sean-
Welcome to the Forum!
First of all..... get some new friends. You don't need to be surrounded by negative people...... their bad energy will just rub off on you.
Secondly..... you're a good looking young guy but even with your hair buzzed short, your disappearing hairline is very obvious. I would suggest buzzing it all the way down with no guard or even shaving it off. It will be a big step for you but believe me there are MANY, MANY women that love shaved heads.
I'm sure Trev, Wil, and some of our other young brothers will more than confirm this.
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you'll do just fine with a shaved head.
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Sean-
Welcome to the Forum!
First of all..... get some new friends. You don't need to be surrounded by negative people...... their bad energy will just rub off on you.
Secondly..... you're a good looking young guy but even with your hair buzzed short, your disappearing hairline is very obvious. I would suggest buzzing it all the way down with no guard or even shaving it off. It will be a big step for you but believe me there are MANY, MANY women that love shaved heads.
I'm sure Trev, Wil, and some of our other young brothers will more than confirm this.
Concider this officially confirmed!! Pretty much every dude on here has a wife/gf and they are hot chicks too (if you dont mind me saying guys)
We baldys are a hot bunch of dudes, embrace it!!
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I have to concur with the other posts. If you look at my avatar it is obvious my hairline is receding also. I'm not as young as you, so listen to the younger guys.
I have to vote to shave it smooth. Your hairline won't be as noticeable. Mine isn't.
Hang in there man.
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Shave it m8. The ladies will be flocking to give it a rub. wish i had shaved mine when I was 21 cos i LURVE IT O0
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Sean,
You're a nice looking young man. The trouble is that the world is cruel. You must arise above the petty friends. Embrace yourself for who you are. If you think shaving your head will help, I say go for it. And by the way, a hearty welcome to the gang. Keep us posted on your progress and feelings. We all do care!
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Hey Sean, first thing a woman who says I don’t want to date a 20 year old who’s balding is probably younger than you right? I wouldn’t call that a woman. Yeah ok by age when you are 18 you are a man or woman but that’s just a number. Girls who are below age 20 have A LOT to learn. There are many things in life we don’t know and we will know as we grow older. As we grow older we start to know ourselves better. So that same “woman” could be dating a bald guy 3 years from now (or even next year!!). People change so much because they realize what they used to go for is not the bed of roses they thought it would be & that what they thought tastes bitter actually tastes good.
Your guy friend laughing is not even funny. I know it’s for a joke but that’s nonsense. They are immature (once again the age factor, they have a lot to learn).
Let’s hope that one immature girl (and yes girl not woman) will not reduce your confidence toward women.
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Welcome to the site. Agree with what others have said. As far as self confidence, I can tell you for sure it will go through the roof when you have kept it shaved for ....... a month or a little longer. It sounds to me that the only way your confidence can possible go, is up. So get started, and keep us posted along the way.
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If you look at my avatar it is obvious my hairline is receding also. I'm not as young as you, so listen to the younger guys.
Your hairline won't be as noticeable. Mine isn't.
GASlick--are you now an MPB, and accept you're no longer a BBC? ;) Sly makes it so easy! O0
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I agree with the other comments so I wont reiterate them. Can I ask about where you live and the kind of people you mix with? Because they sound pretty superficial and immature. I go uni, so it's age ranges 18 and above, and granted I don't notice a lot of people balding, I do notice a fair few. It's not as unusual for young people as is often made out, it's just that people don't often recognise it in its early stages. Then of course many people with a full head of hair are far from good looking. It's not easy coping with baldness at a young age, but for me I consider myself better looking with a shaved balding head then many people with a full head of hair, objectively. You seem to be a good looking chap too so I reckon you should have a similar mindset.
With regard to the jokes the balding ones are so often stupid and not funny. The best thing you can do is smile and show it doesn't get to you. But I do sympathise, if people constantly go on about something, even for something you didn't consider a problem, it can undermine your confidence. If it persists, you have to wonder whether mixing with these people is ultimately good for you. Whether you should even bother spending your time with these juvenile people. I have to say those are the kind of comments I'd expect from a 16 year old rather than people of your age. I personally haven't had those kinds of comments, yet at least, and if I did I might be liable to point out that these full haired chaps aren't so flawless themselves :)
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Man, the people where you live PISS ME OFF. I can't believe the things that have been said to you. Any guy that would use a pic of him with his grandma for his avatar can't be a bad person. f**k the naysayers, bro, they don't mean anything in this world. Shave your head, forget the losers, and remember that you are the sh*t.
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Dude...your 20 years old. Many women/guys in their 20's tend to be rather insensitive when it comes to baldness.
Guys when your younger love to rag on other guys...it makes them feel better about themselves.
Shave your head and be at ease with your hair loss...its never coming back. Ever. Take control, you will be happy you did.
As far as the girl ? Shes ONE girl among many...trust me not every girl feels this way.
I can tell you this from experience....you can either go thru years of denial while
your hair slowly falls out or you can shave it...NOW and be done with it.
I wish there was someone to tell me that when I was your age... peace.
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Sorry to hear that you are getting a bad time from your friends. However, with friends like that who needs... I agree with the rest of the replies - take the plunge and shave it smooth. I believe you will neve go back to having a little bit of hair. It really is a great feeling. Sue, the first time out makes you a bit nervous but in the end it is thw way to go.
GO FOR IT AND ENJOY NEW FOUND FREEDOM!!!
Ken
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Mate,
You're a good looking dude, so don't worry about it. Like the boys said, shave it off. I'm only 23 and i'm receeding fast too....Ive been that way since I was your age too...a piece of advice; work out at the gym...it will do wonders for your confidence. The reason guys lose confidence by balding is because it is out of their hands and guys like to be in control of their bodies. One thing you can control is having a healthy body (I'm a personal trainer by the way so I'm preaching a little here) And i guarantee the ladies will appreciate it more than a head full of hair, because it takes discipline and hard work to achieve. Oh, and i dabble in psychology a bit too, and from what i hear, ladies look at a mans face rather than the top of his head when feeling initial physical attraction, but thats just common sense right!? chin up mate, and remember the best tool a man can have in life is confidence.!
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I'll just add my voice to the ones who have already said, "Shave it." I think it will be a great look for you.
Also, in my experience people will tease you unmercifully when your hair is thinning and receding, but the teasing stops the moment you shave your head. At that point they probably realize that you no longer care, so there's no point in teasing you about it. Or it could be that you look like a badass and they're afraid to mess with you. O:O
Shave your head, and hit the gym and build up your pecs and biceps and you'll look far better than your hairy friends.
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I think the saying goes, "You can't fly with eagles if you run with turkeys." All the guys gave you great advice and insight. And regarding working out, I'm 58 and after going SLY, got back into doing push ups. Up to 100 a day. And doing chin ups too. Gonna have arms like steel soon. Bald head + biceps = a badass look and lovin' from the ladies.
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everyones advice is good but i have a little more to add onto from my own experience.
like i said im 20 also and my hairlines by far worse than yours (i was actually a lot more insecure about it today because i was at the doctors and i felt everyone was staring at me cuz of it). anyways........
ive learned that if you go along with the negative remarks from your friends it not only makes your friends stop, it makes them realize that you dont care about your hairline. the worse thing is to LOOK like your self conscious about your hair. if they crack a joke about your balding just say something like "ouch! low blow" with a laugh and smile ;D". if you make fun of yourself with them it bores them so they stop. you may even gain a little respect from them. ive also noticed its a POSSITIVE thing to kind of pick fun at your hairline in front of girls when first meeting them if your self conscious. it makes you feel more comfortable, and more than none itll make girls laugh and theyll think your cute and funny.
keep your head up man. i know its hard. its easier said than done, but you HAVE to force yourself to stay strong. i still have a hard time looking people in the eyes at times because i feel that they are looking at the top of my head, but i try to command myself to look at them and its not so bad.
and remember......theres people out there that have less hair than you. even people the same age as you like me. my hairline is 2 times as thin as yours.
relax O0
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good statement ghost O0
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Sean -- A balding head is what it is: a balding head. It's reality for many men. A fellow can choose to let it define him, bring him down, shatter his confidence, &tc. It can consume his every waking thought and turn him neurotic. Or he can take the bull by the horns and finish the job that genetics started. He can accept the fact that it is part of the package that makes him uniquely him and build from there.
The arrogance and cruelty of youth results in thoughtless comments and ribbing from friends and acquaintences. (Probably more from friends.) When you shave that pate, the worst of the ribbing will go away. When you can joke back the sting is gone.
As to the females who put all their emphasis on a man's hair -- clearly they need to shop elsewhere. Remember, none of us, however old/young/handsome/ordinary/hairy/bald &tc., is appealing to everyone. And who cares? When you decide to be comfortable with your look, whether coifurred, buzzed, or Sly, you will attract to you those folks to you who are a good match.
When I look at the pics it's obvious that you'll look very sharp Sly. You look good buzzed. And I'll say that in the non-buzzed pic, what my eye is drawn to is your hair. In the buzzed shots, what my eye is drawn to is your face, particularly your strong eyebrows.
Now, do the deed. Chest out, chin up, melon shining. Good luck!
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Sean -- A balding head is what it is: a balding head. It's reality for many men. A fellow can choose to let it define him, bring him down, shatter his confidence, &tc. It can consume his every waking thought and turn him neurotic. Or he can take the bull by the horns and finish the job that genetics started. He can accept the fact that it is part of the package that makes him uniquely him and build from there.
The arrogance and cruelty of youth results in thoughtless comments and ribbing from friends and acquaintences. (Probably more from friends.) When you shave that pate, the worst of the ribbing will go away. When you can joke back the sting is gone.
As to the females who put all their emphasis on a man's hair -- clearly they need to shop elsewhere. Remember, none of us, however old/young/handsome/ordinary/hairy/bald &tc., is appealing to everyone. And who cares? When you decide to be comfortable with your look, whether coifurred, buzzed, or Sly, you will attract to you those folks to you who are a good match.
When I look at the pics it's obvious that you'll look very sharp Sly. You look good buzzed. And I'll say that in the non-buzzed pic, what my eye is drawn to is your hair. In the buzzed shots, what my eye is drawn to is your face, particularly your strong eyebrows.
Now, do the deed. Chest out, chin up, melon shining. Good luck!
Wow couldnt have put it better myself. Go for it Sean
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Sean, you looked great with hair and you look great without hair too. Dont worry about your hair, there are more important things in life that you should be worring about. You can still do all the things you did as when you had hair so dont let your hair come in way for that, it did for me. Its stupid to feel sorry for oneself cause its only yourself that can help yourself motivate going further in life so you can do all the things you dreamt about when you were little and dreaming about now. Enjoy yourself and life while you still can.
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Sean, you looked great with hair and you look great without hair too. Dont worry about your hair, there are more important things in life that you should be worring about. You can still do all the things you did as when you had hair so dont let your hair come in way for that, it did for me. Its stupid to feel sorry for oneself cause its only yourself that can help yourself motivate going further in life so you can do all the things you dreamt about when you were little and dreaming about now. Enjoy yourself and life while you still can.
You are completely right.. I Can't believe the things i missed because i was too selfish and too worried about all the comments i would get from my hair loss. Now that its gone i care a lot less. To the point where negative comments couldnt shake me anyways
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You look like a handsome guy, maybe even better whitout hair. Some girls are really superficial, but it could well be a reaction to your insecurity. Not to you being bald. I started balding a year ago (diffuse all over the top). Two weeks ago i got a shave and i am still not comfortable wth the prospect of a bald head the rest of my life. But before i noticed me going bald, ik never thought of it as a real issue. I even bullied soms of my balding buddies. Not realising that it might be an issue for them. So as for your friends, they don't mean real harm. Some of them are probably getting the same carma for joking i have gotten ;-)
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I think you look really good in your avatar picture. I think with a shaved head you will have plenty of options with women.
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Sean, how is this working out for you so far? I noticed this thread was started 4 months ago. Are things better?
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Pretty good.. Im loving the shaved head and have no regrets now.. I guess people were feeding off my insecurities but damn losing hair isnt an easy thing to deal with. I know there will be those days but they will fade with time..
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Hey Peripheral: love your new pic. LOL