Sly Bald Guys Forum
Discussions About Being Bald => To be or not be...Bald => Topic started by: blondbaldur on December 24, 2008, 10:10:18 AM
-
Hi Guys,
I'm brand new to this forum, but have something to ask I've been thinking about a while.
My hair is really beginning to thin out on the top. I've kept it shaggy for years, and now it's actually about shoulder length. It's getting to the point that it doesn't look too bad, but not that good either. It's receded a good bit on the front and I have a nice bald spot toward the back.
But I also wear hearing aids in both ears; they are the kind that fit behind the ears with earmolds in the ears. It's not that I'm ashamed or embarrased to wear them, but with my hair covering them, it makes them less noticeable. It's just that I don't like new people I meet assuming I'm deaf and screaming at me, or assuming I'm deficient in some kind of way. I can hear nearly normally with them. The small newer kinds of hearing aids that fit in your ears and aren't visible aren't an option.
Has anyone had any experience like this? What should I do? I think a bald head would be cool, but then the ha's would be so obvious and noticeable.
-
Welcome to SBG Blondbaldur. I wouldn't worry about it too much...consider how many people are walking around with visible Bluetooth devices in their ears all day long and in public! Actually some people consider them deficient because it seems like they're talking to themselves.
-
Welcome to the forum. The way that you're describing your hair doesn't sound too attractive, so shaving your head appears to be in order. Part of the 'attractiveness' of shaving is the attitude change most people experience. The empowering feeling you get makes you say 'screw everyone, it's my life.' You'll experience a boost of confidence. Maybe it's just me, but I don't give a second thought to people who wear hearing aids. I assume they need it, and that's that... just like people who wear glasses... you need them; you wear them. If people have a problem with it, well, that's their problem. Those people would probably find fault with just about everything. Let us know what you decide, and post up a pic.
-
Welcome to the Forum !! O0
I agree with Stu, most people don't care whether you have hearing aids or not. I don't think you should let that stop you from shaving the noggin. I see people all the time with hearing aids and I don't give it a second thought. I agree with Rob also, about the bluetooth, I think that people walking around with them all day look ridiculous.
-
howdy..put up a pic and we will comment fair and square. If you need to have them whether you're bald or not, you need to have them. Going bald shouldnt' matter.
-
Bro - I think you just posed a first ! I don't see it as being any different from a Bluetooth. Go for it and see how it looks. It's hair. If you do not like the look you can grow it back. Happy Christmas!
-
Welcome aboard dude. Sounds like you will look a lot beter with a shaved head. Make yourself happy and tell the others to piss off.
-
There are people who have had hair transplants that didn't work out who ended up shaving their head. If those people can shave their head with some scars, then wearing a hearing aid should be a piece of cake!
-
There are people who have had hair transplants that didn't work out who ended up shaving their head. If those people can shave their head with some scars, then wearing a hearing aid should be a piece of cake!
Excellent point, Marsh. O0
-
Just another thought: we're all our own worst critics when it comes to cosmetic flaws, whether they are real or just perceived. We've seen that in several threads on this forum -- where people say that "I think shaved heads look good, but it wouldn't look good on me" or the more recent one - "grey hair looks OK on other people but not on me".
I started wearing glasses when I was four years old. I got teased a bit at school in the early years, but as time went by there were more kids with glasses and it ceased to be a big deal. It was never an issue after that until I shaved my head five years ago and I have not worn glasses in public since. I wear them around the house, but I've always felt ridiculous wearing glasses with a shaved head, even though I think that combo looks perfectly fine on everybody else. It wasn't until just a few nights ago when I was wearing my glasses and caught a glimpse of myself in the mirror and suddenly thought that it didn't look half bad.
The bottom line is, you've built this up in your mind to be a huge deal, but it isn't going to be a big deal to anybody else. When you're out in public now, I'll bet that nobody points to you and says, "Look at the guy with the hearing aids." And they're not going to start doing that just because you've shaved your head.
-
Thanks for all the responses so far. I guess I shouldn't worry about things so much and just go for bald. I think I have made to big of a deal of it to myself. Thanks Razor X. I'm way too self-conscious about everything though and always try to be a "people pleaser." I guess I'm self-conscious about wearing ha's because you have to prove yourself more often and work harder when you are at a disadvantage. And I used to get teased when I was younger. But it's one of those things I need to think about I guess. A lot. Long hair has kind of been my identity for such a long time. But maybe that time is passing. I'd say I don't care what others think about my looks, but I do. If I didn't, I wouldn't have made this post here, and I wouldn't worry about how I looked with my hair like it is now. I would not worry about wearing decent, ironed clothes, etc. Oh, the irony. ;-) If I really didn't care, I'd say screw whoever doesn't like my half bald longhaired head, and conversely, I'd say the same about my shaved head were I to take that route!
Here's what my hair looks like now. I'm trying hard to imagine what it'd look like gone.
-
Your hair doesn't really look bad in the photos, but there are signs of thinning and at some point you're going to have to get rid of the long hair, because it just isn't going to work if you've got little or nothing on top. You might want to start by getting a buzz cut -- a #2 (1/4") to start, and gradually go shorter as you get more comfortable with having less hair.
-
http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=user.viewProfile&friendID=9883394
This guy shaved he head (i think for charity) but wears hearing aids and looks cool with the combo of both. Hope he give you some more inspiration. Go to his pics and look in 'Hot 107.9 fun' There is a bald pic in there, with his aids in clear, but not bad sight.
Let us know what you decide, but, you will never know unless you try, and your hair seems to have made up it's mind already.
-
If you really wanted to shaved your head, I think it would actually look good. Especially, if you kept the beard, I think that it would actually look kind of intimidating with the darkness of it. I don't think that anyone would say anything about the hearing aids.
-
If you really wanted to shaved your head, I think it would actually look good. Especially, if you kept the beard, I think that it would actually look kind of intimidating with the darkness of it. I don't think that anyone would say anything about the hearing aids.
and if anyone is lame enough to say something about a person's hearing aids, then I have 2 recommendations. First off, do what my mother-in-law does, and pretend that they're not turned on, so that you can't hear what anyone says. Secondly, if you feel like you have to say anything in response, tell them to GET STUFFED and to PISS OFF!
For what it's worth, I have a hard time hearing out of my right ear, and had my ears tested a couple of years ago. They told me at the time that the hearing loss was due to nerve deadness (?), and that it couldn't be corrected by hearing aids. I've been thinking about going to someone else for another test and for a 2nd opinion. If I had a hearing aid and someone had the nerve to say anything to me, then I'd have to glare at them or something.
-
if you think it will make you happy just do it, it will grow back if you don't!
Also isnt it possible to get mini hearing aids that just fit in the ear and not around? Or is this just me getting fiction mixed up with fact?
-
Man, you hair looks fine. But since you are thinking in the terms of Slyness, Try it. I also think a bald head with the beard would be an awsome look. Listen to your heart and good luck
-
Buzzing down, at least, would give you an entirely different look -- a very good one, I think -- and a freedom not attainable with long locks. Whether slick or buzzed, it puts it out there. It also elevates to Sly, your attitudes pertaining to both balding pate and hearing aids.
You put your hearing aids in every day, and benefit from them, so you have a pretty intimate relationship with them through experience and use. Because of that, it's only natural that you would be thinking about them in conjunction with hair (or no-hair) style choices. This may be a stretch, but hiding mpb may be in a way like hiding the hearing aids -- deal the same with both, and you've made a strong statement about the "new you." I think you'd look terrific with a short buzz or Sly.
-
It would look cool shaved.
-
Like the other guys, I don't think the hearing aids are anything to worry about. But consider this, although you have a fair amount of hair remaining, it is also obvious that you have MPB. Whether it progresses rapidly, or slowly, it will progress and as it does the contradiction of MPB and long hair may result is a rather unpleasing overall effect. Consider also that hearing aids are shrinking all the time. I remember my Aunt's set when I was little, it was about the size of a pocket novel, perhaps larger, required daily battery changes w/ batteries that could probably start a car they were so large. So I think it may be a style change you might want to try. You've got a nice full thick beard, so you could try the shaved dome with the beard, modify the beard into a more trimmed style too. But, try the shorter hair--most of it >:D will grow back if you don't like it. But, hearing aids, that's not a worry at all. And they too will get smaller.
-
Hi again, Sly Guys,
I really do appreciate all the responses and the positive and upbeat attitude that I've noticed as I looked through some of the various threads. I wasn't just yanking anyone's chain or trying to "rub" long hair in anyone's face, so to speak, because I really have been thinking seriously about a new look. It is inevitable that I will be bald by nature in the future, God willing. My hair is thinning out up top, so I have a few years left maybe. My main concerns are that it takes thirty minutes to shave it off, two years to grow back long. Also, I talked to my gf and she wasn't too keen on the idea of me shaving. I can't bite the hand that_____me.
And about the hearing aids, I need to just get over it as some of you mentioned. Everyone I know knows I wear them. That's not a worry. I guess it's just with new people that I need to know for business, etc. that might react with an ever-so-slight subliminal judgment of my inadequacy and what wasn't said would be the concern, not what was said.
I think what I will end up doing is hanging on to long hair a little longer, then start going shorter. I will be sly, it is only a matter of time, whether by nature or the razor.
But to reply to specifics:
"When you're out in public now, I'll bet that nobody points to you and says, "Look at the guy with the hearing aids." And they're not going to start doing that just because you've shaved your head."
-This is funny because I probably wouldn't even be aware of it if someone were to say this on account of not hearing it. That's some kind of irony.
"They told me at the time that the hearing loss was due to nerve deadness (?), and that it couldn't be corrected by hearing aids."
-Nerve deafness can be helped by hearing aids; you need to see an ear doctor maybe instead of an audiologist.
"Also isn't it possible to get mini hearing aids that just fit in the ear and not around?"
-They make mini hearing aids, but they are only useful for small hearing losses.
"This may be a stretch, but hiding mpb may be in a way like hiding the hearing aids -- deal the same with both, and you've made a strong statement about the "new you." "
-I like this statement, and I appreciate your candor.
"You've got a nice full thick beard."
-Thanks. I really enjoy having a beard, and I definitely wouldn't get rid of it even if I did cut/shave my hair. I usually keep it much shorter than in the pictures. A short beard of about 1/4 inch is my favorite length. At least our beards don't thin out ever!
Thanks again, and Happy New Year to all. I am going to keep reading here for inspiration in 2009.
-
My hair is thinning out up top, so I have a few years left maybe.
Not to burst your bubble, but a lot of us thought the same thing, only to find out after the fact, when looking back at old photos, that we didn't have as much time as we'd thought. The one regret nearly everyone expresses after taking the plunge is not doing so sooner. If you're starting to thin out on top, consider shaving it off sooner rather than later. It's a huge relief not to watch your hair disappear little by little.
My main concerns are that it takes thirty minutes to shave it off, two years to grow back long.
You'll have to come to terms with the fact that your long-haired days will be over. Maybe gradually going shorter with each haircut until you're ready to shave will make the transition easier. In my opinion, long hair doesn't look good on guys once they're past a certain age. Not saying that you are old, but that it's something you'll have to face sooner or later anyway, hair loss not withstanding.
-
My Jersey friend Mr X is right. I wish I had had the ability to either shave it off at say 25 or laser it off at that time. I pushed the envelope many many years too long.
-
My Jersey friend Mr X is right. I wish I had had the ability to either shave it off at say 25 or laser it off at that time. I pushed the envelope many many years too long.
I have to say that is true in most cases. I found my old gov't id today in my desk taken the year I went sly--it looks like my hair, in the fashion of a hat pushed too far back--was about the fall off the back ;D ;D ;D. It's really a shock when you start seeing more scalp than hair getting out of the shower, or seeing "through" the hair when you're brushing and combing the remnants into shape for spray down.
Recently, when I was working in Texas, the IT guy was helping us get connected to the net, nice guy, smart and friendly, but he had shoulder length hair, and the receding hairline had left two abandoned "islands" up front and he had let that grow long. I had to really control myself not to tell him to get serious and look at himself.
It's tough to say goodbye to something that you believe has assisted you dealing w/ personal issues, but to echo the Brothers above, consider life as a journey, and the hair part of your journey is at the end. I think we all support you, but we all are very much aware from personal experience that having accepted the fact of MPB and shaved, one of the immediate personal reactions is, "Why did I wait so long?"
But, we're all glad you're here, and we hope you get support from what you read and see. Bald ain't bad, it's good in fact. O:OGoing bald, on the other hand is the sh_ts! :px
-
(https://www.slybaldguys.com/smf/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fs4.postimg.org%2Fobsn3si19%2Fmateus_bald.jpg&hash=83888c46a5e5ce64206f85e251b285038beffe97) (http://postimage.org/)
Back in 2008, I made a few posts here about making the choice to be bald and my apprehensions about it due to wearing hearing aids and having had long hair for quite some time.
Well, I finally decided to shave it all off, and I love it! I don't regret it even a little, and the response from everyone has been overwhelmingly positive!
-
It looks great, I didn't notice the hearing aids at all.
-
Six years and you finally took the plunge. Congratulations. Looks good with the beard and the hearing aid is not noticeable.
-
Welcome to the sly side. I can see why you get good comments, you look great! When I shaved my head 1.5 years ago, it was supposed to be a one time shave. Still sly and look forward to my shave everyday.
-
Thanks, guys, for the good words, and it is much appreciated! I actually don't have my hearing aids in in this picture, but technology has gotten to where the type that fits in the ears are sufficient, and that is what I now have.
-
You look great mate. Welcome to the sky life!
-
Great photo. The bald head, the beard, and the glasses are an excellent combo!
-
Let me echo everyone else--very good look for you!
-
Man - I just have to chime in that I think you look great. And I have to thank you as well. Because I wasn't going to share it with anyone but you have given me a bit of courage.
I am embarrassed to even admit this but:
I have an appointment with the VA a week from tomorrow to get hearing aids. I don't know yet if I am going to get two right away or just try one on the left side at first.
In one way I have been anxious for it/them, because while I "hear" everything, I can't understand much of what is being said in any conversation that is more than one-on-one. So in social situations I just have to smile and nod a lot!
On the other hand, I am having a really tough time turning 60. I don't feel 60 and I don't think that I look 60. I jut don't think that wearing hearing aids is going to make me any more attractive. I am a bit concerned that they are going to interfere with my dating life! I mean, who in the bar is going to be interested in the bald guy with the gray beard and hearing aids?
So half of me wants to to say; "FTW" and order either bright red or black ones! While the other half of me thinks that I should grow some hair back to hide them a bit.
O.K. guys: Be honest with me.
-
Earlier this week I encountered a guy who shaves his head, and he has bone-anchored hearing devices (I had to Google it to identify it). Visually, looked like quarter-sized plastic pads attached above the ears.
Different look, for sure. Did anyone in the crowd seem to notice? Not a one. The guy was enjoying every moment of the day. As is written over and over around SBG ... it's really a matter of being comfortable and confident with yourself.
I definitely admired how he moved through the crowd without a care in the world. Truly awesome.
-
I have worn behind the ears hearing aids for some years and have had shaven head for many years. I shaved head many years ago - around 30 before it became more common. I wanted the confidence of being able to be different. Enjoyed the comments I got then. With more severe hearing loss those that fit within the ear do not provide sufficient power. Mine now are bluetooth enabled - they now need to work on better rechargeable batteries for these - that last more than 8-10 hours.
-
In one way I have been anxious for it/them, because while I "hear" everything, I can't understand much of what is being said in any conversation that is more than one-on-one. So in social situations I just have to smile and nod a lot!
This is so very much like me. I also have a really hard time with the TV (thank goodness for closed captions) and with telephone conversations.
When I can get the scratch together, I'll get hearing aids and will wear them proudly with my gleaming smooth head.
On the other hand, I am having a really tough time turning 60. I don't feel 60 and I don't think that I look 60.
You don't. And I know what you mean. I turned 57 yesterday and there's no way on earth I feel that old. (Though my back does. And sometimes my left knee.)
I am a bit concerned that they are going to interfere with my dating life! I mean, who in the bar is going to be interested in the bald guy with the gray beard and hearing aids?
Were I single, I for one, would surely date you.
While the other half of me thinks that I should grow some hair back to hide them a bit.
Ignore that half. It's leading you astray.
-
See, we told you it would be OK! Congratulations!