Sly Bald Guys Forum
Discussions About Being Bald => Reactions to being Bald => Topic started by: -Doug- on October 18, 2007, 02:16:59 PM
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Has anybody noticed a difference in the reactions from female friends/coworkers vs. those from male friends/coworkers. 99.9% of the females have reacted/commented favorably O0 p!m* to my new look. However, it seems that most of the male reactions have been "so when are you going to grow it out", "doesn't that take a lot of time to do?" and "I couldn't do that."
1.Has anyone else come across this type of male reaction?
2. Do you think it is routed in the respondents own insecurities about their appearance?
Discuss...
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I haven't come across that type of reaction with my male friends. Though, I think the type of guys that would say that are dealing with their own insecurities.
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Well I went to see my tat artist a couple weeks ago and it had been a while since I hung out with him. He use to be sly and I was gonna introduce him to the site, anyway I got there and he had hair! I was like whoa! and he had the same reaction. It was pretty amusing.
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As I recall, I have FAR LESS comments as a BBC/shaved than prior.
Agreed, I think female friends do act more supportive/interested. However, I don't care about the comments...it's a positive, confident attitude that always takes me forward regarding my personal appearance.
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1.Has anyone else come across this type of male reaction?
no.....all the male reactions from family/friends/co-workers have been positive atleast that what is perceived when they r in my prescence.
2. Do you think it is routed in the respondents own insecurities about their appearance?
i haven't come across that type of reaction with my male friends. however....i agree with tyler that people like that r dealing with their own insecurities.
WARHAWK O0
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They're jealous you had the b@lls to do it bro..
seen it before...
You've got the upper hand on this one!
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I did get alot of comments when I first did it, like "Hey Curly", "what happened to your hair", cue-ball, baldie, can "Your pretty good at that, can you shave my nuts for me" etc. They kinda sting, but no more than any other male "bonding".
It was all in good fun and pretty much what happens to anyone that makes a drastic change in appearance. Just have to have a few good comebacks like "Sorry, did the stubble chafe your wifes thighs" or "and I am still better lookin than you" and be able to take it with a grain of salt.
I get alot of weak references now like "you look like ____Insert any bald celeb here_____" when I meet new people.
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Nobody said anything ... or has said much of anything.
Male co-workers have made comments about shiny-ness after I started using HeadShade, one bald guy told me "nice look," others have only alluded to my SLY-ness.
One woman (who met me just before the summer) asked, "Didn't you used to have hair."
Otherwise, no female co-worker (who have seen me daily) have said anything.
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As many know,my going bald was done at work,in front of many people,along with 7 others.It even made the newspaper and tv.So that said,i had a lot of support from both genders.Most women have loved the change,my wife being the one that counted most.
As far as mens reactions:I have had more positive comments since some of them are already bald.AND.... i have been hit on by more men since too.I admit i have had quite a few of these since growing my moustache larger.I cannot understand it as i think of myself as a rather average guy.Nothing special.And not great looking ;D
But since posting my bald pic on a few moustache/beard sites and such,i have received more emails :)
Still...i find these complimentary,even nice.Anyone else had such a thing happen?
It isn't a bad thing at all.Just new for me.Even after a few years of receiving them.
In addition,not one woman has hit on me.No,i don't need it (married happily)but it would be nice for my self esteem O0
Jim
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well im of a slightly younger crowd, no co-workers n all that, still studying so this is Univeristy/College people but most girls tend to either respond with 'cool', 'nice', such...you know, positive short comments, wheras guys actually tend to want to talk/discuss it with many incredibly odd questions.
"Do you use soap or shampoo on your head?"
"Do you polish it for the shine?"
"Does ur head feel weird?"
"Do you have to comb ur scalp?"
"Does it not grow back???"
and i have had many a long conversation with guys about it. Girls, also tend to 'rub my head' a lot.
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I think I got more positive comments from females. The males were either less inclined to give a compliment or were just intimidated by the fact that I did it and didn't care what others thought.
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I think I got more positive comments from females. The males were either less inclined to give a compliment or were just intimidated by the fact that I did it and didn't care what others thought.
as a rule guys don't tend to comment on other gays, else is may look "gay"
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But isn't it a cryin shame that a man has to be careful of what he says lest it be taken in a "gay" way?A guy should be able to give a compliment to another man without the "gay"stigma attached to it.
Many make fun of the words "male bonding".Thats just wrong.Maybe thats one of the many reasons our world is so screwed up.
And another thing,how did the word "gay" come to signify homosexual men?Used to be it meant happy.
Sorry about running off topic.
Anyway,a man should be able to speak openly about most things.
Jim
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And another thing,how did the word "gay" come to signify homosexual men?Used to be it meant happy.
I'm sure some of our gay sly guys could probably answer that one. I am a fan of old movies, and it is very common to hear the word 'gay' in those movies where it means happy and light-hearted . There is even a movie from the 1930's I haven't yet seen called 'The Gay Divorcee' -- Fred Astaire and Ginger Rogers. It is interesting to see how words evolve / go out of favor over time, as well as how new ones develop today, especially evolving from all the new technology.
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Seems my personal experiences have echoed many here.
I've had very little remarks from coworkers as few ever saw me with hair. I too am happily married but I agree with Jim, getting compliments from females does improve your self-esteem.
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If you can call someone guessing your age and being wrong by about 10 years a compliment, then I guess I've received a compliment. The thing that I wish I had the guts to do when I see guys who have very advanced balding would be to tell them, 'dude you look too old; shave that head and you'll look much younger.'
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I agree!!!! O0 O0 O0
Or the 60+year old man with a ponytail out the back and no hair anywhere else. Yuk!
Jim
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But isn't it a cryin shame that a man has to be careful of what he says lest it be taken in a "gay" way?A guy should be able to give a compliment to another man without the "gay"stigma attached to it.
Many make fun of the words "male bonding".Thats just wrong.Maybe thats one of the many reasons our world is so screwed up.
And another thing,how did the word "gay" come to signify homosexual men?Used to be it meant happy.
Sorry about running off topic.
Anyway,a man should be able to speak openly about most things.
Jim
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gay
should answer your question Jim. I actually thought "gay" had been chosen by gay people to describe themselves relatively recently in preference to the other common & shall we say, less polite terms. However, it seems it has a much longer history. Actually, the wiki article also addresses Stew's point about the earlier usage too as in films like "The Gay Divorcee" & "The Gay Falcon". Apparently it started off as slang to describe any hedonistic lifestyle:
"The use of gay to mean homosexual was in origin merely an extension of the word's sexualised connotation of "carefree and uninhibited", which implied a willingness to disregard conventional or respectable sexual mores. Such usage is documented as early as the 1920s. It was initially more commonly used to imply heterosexually unconstrained lifestyles, as for example in the once-common phrase "gay Lothario",[3] or in the title of the book and film The Gay Falcon (1941), which concerns a womanizing detective whose first name is "Gay".
Interestingly too - the battle for "gay" goes on as many youngsters today have adopted the word to mean anything "naff" or lousy as in ..."oh that's so gaaaay"
re; getting hit on by more men - doesn't surprise me at all Jim. Mustaches such as yours were once (in the seventies & eighties really) very very popular amongst certain gay men & even more so with a shaved head. It was all part of a deliberate effort by some gay men to reject the limp-wristed stereotypes that were then so current. Also, a lot of gay men simply like very masculine guys & the mustache is certainly a symbol of masculinity (since most women can't grow them) as is a bald or shaved head to a certain extent & many gay men are, of course, very masculine themselves & so like to adopt such a look. Besides all that, (if it's not too gay to say) you're a pretty decent looking guy anyway so ...
As for it being a cryin' shame that men have to watch what they say lest it be taken as too "gay" .... well, not surprisingly I suppose ... I couldn't agree more O0 It does get very tedious sometimes. :/O
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Thanks shyslyguy,for both the definition and the kind words.Makes complete sense as well.
And for what it's worth,i don't mind being hit on either.Comes with the territory i guess.
I really don't care if someone questions my preference either.Doesn't affect me a bit.Curiosity forced my question.
If my moustache and bald head do that,oh well.
Jim
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Thanks for the great info/insight shyslyguy. I knew someone would come through.
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No problem guys, glad I could help.
Good to hear that you don't worry too much about such things Jim. I've never understood really why some guys do get so uptight (not that I go around hitting on straight guys I hasten to add) but after all, a compliment is a compliment. If someone hits on me (rare these days I admit) then I take it as a compliment whoever it is - only ever becomes / became annoying if someone won't take no for an answer - otherwise - no problem. :)
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Almost all the comments, when I get them which isn't that often, are complimentary with the exception of some "bald" guys wearing the hairy toilet seat. I think their comments are a reflection of their state of mind vis a vis their scalp status and dealing with it. Basically I suspect most of them have thought of shaving and don't have the balls to accept and move forward Sly! Two guys made a comment that was a little disturbing to react to, "Cancer?" I still haven't figured out what I should have said or will say if anyone else comes up with that one.
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Almost all the comments, when I get them which isn't that often, are complimentary with the exception of some "bald" guys wearing the hairy toilet seat. I think their comments are a reflection of their state of mind vis a vis their scalp status and dealing with it. Basically I suspect most of them have thought of shaving and don't have the balls to accept and move forward Sly! Two guys made a comment that was a little disturbing to react to, "Cancer?" I still haven't figured out what I should have said or will say if anyone else comes up with that one.
I'd probably have replied "No - Aquarius actually."
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Almost all the comments, when I get them which isn't that often, are complimentary with the exception of some "bald" guys wearing the hairy toilet seat. I think their comments are a reflection of their state of mind vis a vis their scalp status and dealing with it. Basically I suspect most of them have thought of shaving and don't have the balls to accept and move forward Sly! Two guys made a comment that was a little disturbing to react to, "Cancer?" I still haven't figured out what I should have said or will say if anyone else comes up with that one.
I'd probably have replied "No - Aquarius actually."
:*)) :*)) :*)) Quick wit there, shy.
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Almost all the comments, when I get them which isn't that often, are complimentary with the exception of some "bald" guys wearing the hairy toilet seat. I think their comments are a reflection of their state of mind vis a vis their scalp status and dealing with it. Basically I suspect most of them have thought of shaving and don't have the balls to accept and move forward Sly! Two guys made a comment that was a little disturbing to react to, "Cancer?" I still haven't figured out what I should have said or will say if anyone else comes up with that one.
I'd probably have replied "No - Aquarius actually."
Indeed ShySly, cracking razor wit. O0
I will use this same line next time some ignoramus makes a snide remark in this vein.
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some "bald" guys wearing the hairy toilet seat
Good one! :*))
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Thanks ShySlyGuy--It's a balanced response from now on, Libra actually.
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Well at a couple of parties last night received overwhelming approval of the new (3 weeks tomorrow) look, much to the dismay of my disapproving wife. She told one of our friends, I know in jest, that she'd kill her if she repeated to me that the friend really liked it. It was my wife against all our friends, and I was getting the head rubs right in front of her from her lady friends------LOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! A couple of guys admitted they had or are thinking about it. This gets better by the day.
Thanks for the online support.
For you fence sitters, come on Sly, it's a great way to live, laugh and be happy.
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Although I’m not clean shaven, my #0 buzz is a radical departure from how I have been appearing for the past several years.
A good number of my musical friends are sly by choice and they tell me it looks fierce as hell. I have a tendency to dress rather eccentrically on and off stage and have been accused of being a Neo-Nazi before. (yes, even with my fiance standing next to me) I was a little concerned about the change. I quickly realized that the world is populated largely of stupid people who say and think stupid things. The individual has the power to be affected or not.
My fiancés take on it is “Yes, the spiked hair was a good look but it was time for a change. I had somehow outgrown it”. She claims to really like the buzz but is resistant to me going completely sly for now.
I get comments like “wow, you look so different” But I really haven’t gotten any rave reviews other than the most important one. I may grow it back out of vanity after the first of the year, but the longer I keep it short, the more I get used to recognizing myself.
I do know that full sly is in the future and I no longer fear that future. To me, that’s the issue.
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Funny stuff Saint & Shy. Good ammo. O0
My reaction from my buds has been nothing but positive. They know why I went sly & the fact I've gotten total relief from the itchin'. Plus, they really don't view me any differently than before. I'm still a dork, just now I'm a bald dork.
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I've gotten nothing but positive comments about the bald look since I started doing it a few years ago. I don't think I've had any negative comments at all....I've fielded alot of questions about shaving, being bald, what it's like in the winter, the laser stuff....but nothing negative.
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I've gotten nothing but positive comments about the bald look since I started doing it a few years ago. I don't think I've had any negative comments at all....I've fielded alot of questions about shaving, being bald, what it's like in the winter, the laser stuff....but nothing negative.
Is it common knowledge amongst your friends and family that you're getting the laser treatments?
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Yeah everyone I know is aware of what I'm doing.
Usually new acquantinces find out pretty quick once they start inquiring about the bald look, shaving, whether I plan to keep the look a while...when they ask that question I generally say "well, ummm, yeah I don't have much choice now..."
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Like JF I got laser treatments but I kept it to myself after the lst few. Not even my wife knew.
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When I became BBC the general reaction was 99% positive specially from women.
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Mostly positive reactions. Even the very few 'negative' reactions werent that negative.
I was asked to go for a part in our amatuer production of 'Anything Goes' a while back (I'm in a musical society for my sins) and the producer asked if I'd grow my hair. Of course, I refused: still got the part though!!
When i saw my uncle he rubbed my head and asked jokingly when I was gettin my hair cut.
Everyone else has either given no comment or positive ones, whether they are male or female. Who cares any how? Its me I gotta please, and I'm PLEASED! 8) O0
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I'd probably have replied "No - Aquarius actually."
I love it. I’ve been getting the Big C question a lot too. It doesn’t help that I have lost 50 lbs since July in addition to my recent new non-coif. Unfortunately, I really am a Cancer being born in July. I guess I could use “Aquarius” anyway. Who’ll know?