Sly Bald Guys Forum

New Member Section => Introductions => Topic started by: leroybrown on November 09, 2013, 10:32:20 AM

Title: new, old and ready to bald...
Post by: leroybrown on November 09, 2013, 10:32:20 AM
Hello, where to start?
Ive been balding for more than a decade now and I think im gearing up to the idea of complete baldness but I hope I have more time left, we shall see.
I am 31 and have been realising hair in the bath for many years but the last few moths its getting to the point of at least 30 strands floting horribly in the water :(
Never mind, I appreciate the few I have left now more than ever!
To think being ginger was always a problem, I would give a lot now for a full head again!
Ive posted on this forum now to build myself up to the shave off but I have an 'abnormal' shaped head which is really holding me back to the point of borderline depression
This is the first time ive opened myself to the idea of shaving my head so im looking for some help maybe just a friendly chat
Please help ;)
Title: Re: new, old and ready to bald...
Post by: Mike E. P. on November 09, 2013, 11:50:15 AM
Hello Leroy,

I think many of us were or are in the position you are in now.  Like you, I tried to hold on to my hair as long as possible. Losing it for me was a very slow and gradual process, trough which I stressed and worried myself enormously.

When I was round thirty five I had had it with the elaborate hair routine, trying to disguise my balding. I had it shaved down at the barbers to what we called a crew cut. And like you, I worried about whether or not I could pull it off.  But I liked it from the get go - it certainly was a huge improvement over my thinning and receding hair.  I eventually went shorter and shorter and today I either use a clippers with no guard or wet shave all the way.

I haven't seen too many sly guys who don't look good with a shaved head. There are probably a lot of us that worry about the shape of our heads. When I look at pictures of myself from the back, I think I have a pretty misshapen head (so I don't look at pictures of me from the back!)  but really I know the way I view myself is more critically than most.  I bet that's the same for you, too.

If there were some miracle pill that would provide me with the hair I used to have, I would take it, but that's not going to happen. It took me quite a bit of time to accept myself bald, but I l do like myself bald. There are lots of advantages which you will read about in this forum.

Take advantage of SBG. It is a great place for support and the guys and girls on here are terrific.

Mike
Title: Re: new, old and ready to bald...
Post by: slymyke on November 09, 2013, 11:54:26 AM
Welcome, Leroybrown!

It is fairly safe for me to say that most of us who have shaved felt the same way you do right now.  We thought our heads were oddly shaped and could not possibly look okay shaven.  Then we were pleasantly surprised to not just look okay, but to really think we looked good... And better than we thought....and completely better than we did before the shave.   This is true for me and other guys have said the same thing----that is why we can't help saying, "I sure wish I did this sooner!  Just look at all the years I wasted."

Free yourself of the continued worries and move on to the new you!  We tend to think that our thinning hair is able to hide imperfections in our head, but I think it sometimes actually exaggerates them and makes them more noticeable.
Title: Re: Re: new, old and ready to bald...
Post by: PKingsley on November 09, 2013, 03:42:58 PM
You do not have to shave your head if you don't think you should.  If, indeed, your head looks better to you with hair covering part of it, then keep it, by all means.
It seems to me that what we think will be secondary.
Title: Re: Re: new, old and ready to bald...
Post by: slymyke on November 09, 2013, 08:49:12 PM
You do not have to shave your head if you don't think you should.  If, indeed, your head looks better to you with hair covering part of it, then keep it, by all means.
It seems to me that what we think will be secondary.

Yes, PKingsley... it is pretty obvious that there are no guns pointing to his head waiting for him to shave it.  One of the main reasons this forum exists is to allow people to ask for opinions and advice on their situation.  Of course the replies are secondary, but if someone is seeking support, we offer it accordingly. I'm sorry you wasted your first post on SBG to point out the obvious (that it is ultimatley the decision of the one who is shaving)... but how is he supposed to know if he likes his head "with hair covering part of it" if he hasn't shaved it yet.  If someone comes here looking for support on getting the courage to shave their head... we will offer it.  Pretty simple.
Title: Re: new, old and ready to bald...
Post by: Magoo on November 09, 2013, 09:08:45 PM
Shaving your head does not have to be your next step . Start with a buzz cut # 2 or a #1. From there you can better judge if you are ready to shave.
Title: Re: new, old and ready to bald...
Post by: Sir Harry on November 09, 2013, 09:50:35 PM
Welcome to the forum! If you can, post a pic so we can offer better advice.
Title: Re: new, old and ready to bald...
Post by: mrzed on November 10, 2013, 04:49:57 AM
Welcome to SBG.

You'll also find a number of guys here on the site who are not balding at all, but just endorse and embrace the bald look. Usually called BBC (Bald By Choice). 

So whether you have lots of hair, some hair or little hair, SBG is the place to learn about another option in hair care/style.

To choose to be bald, you don't have to wait until the last minute, till the thinning/balding head just looks so bad that sly is the only choice. 
Title: Re: new, old and ready to bald...
Post by: xnewyawka on November 10, 2013, 09:41:37 AM
Welcome Leroy. I suggest you start with a buzz cut, either a 1/4" or 1/8" (similar to Jason Statham, which I am currently rocking) and go from there. This will allow you to get used to having shorter hair, and then you can decide if you want to try a full shave with a blade or keep it as is.
Good luck and keep us posted.  O0
Title: Re: new, old and ready to bald...
Post by: leroybrown on November 10, 2013, 10:12:10 AM
Wow great response there, thanks to all...
I currently have short back and sides and when its freshly cut its fine, im not actually that thin on top as yet. My main concern is the floating hairs post-bathing lol.
I have really thick hair or so ive been told, but its showing thru on top especially when its freshly cut.
When I leave it for a while my hair loss really shows as the thickness on the sides compared to on top.
My worst fear though is my head shape, its more elongated than round. Like Gabrel Obertan the Newcastle United footballer
 :)
Title: Re: new, old and ready to bald...
Post by: isleepinthebuff on November 10, 2013, 10:24:49 AM
As Sir Harry says, post a picture as it's easier for us to give advice. The easiest thing is to keep your hair short and slowly reduce the length into a buzzcut and then shave.

If you still have hair on top you don't need to shave it now but just get used to the idea and toy with styles to help your confidence. Although there are some here that think all men, women, children and small animals should all shave their head and have a  beard, when you're losing your hair it can take time to get used to what that means. So don't worry about the stress, most of us have felt it on our journey to where we are now.  
Title: Re: new, old and ready to bald...
Post by: Cave Dweller on November 10, 2013, 12:57:05 PM
I also am of the opinion that you should take your time and do with your hair what makes you happy. If that means easing into going smooth through a progressively shorter cut, or taking a few months to get up the nerve to take it all off in one move, that is perfectly fine.

Just quit worrying yourself into a depression of how you will look or how people will react. As Slymyke said, a lot of us felt the same anxiety before we took the plunge, and were surprised at how positive the responses were and how no one noticed the respective flaws we saw in ourselves.

Glad you joined the board, sir.
Title: Re: Re: new, old and ready to bald...
Post by: PKingsley on November 11, 2013, 09:58:43 AM
I am amazed by personal reaction of Slymyke to post.  I think attitude of wasting post was most unkind.
I say, as others do, that you need feel no pressure to shave hair if you don't want.  It is your opinion that count most.
Title: Re: new, old and ready to bald...
Post by: g_bald on November 11, 2013, 10:54:13 AM
Welcome to you, Leroy!

I know the feeling of wanting to keep the hair as long as you can. If the hair you have now looks OK to you (and others) it's certainly "OK" to hang onto what you have now. Otherwise, you might want to go with a longish buzz cut (say #4) and see if you like it better. I wouldn't be too concerned with your head shape as much. If you're going to end up losing it all, that will eventually appear anyway.

I had a series of progressively shorter and shorter buzz cuts myself, mostly because I love the feeling of really close cut hair. But when it started to get thinner and thinner, I decided to just shave it off, so I know how you feel. I worried about other's reactions, but mostly there were positive comments. Take your time, do what's right for you and most of all, keep yourself in a happy place.

Also, take time to navigate around the forum and read up the various posts, I think they will help you to realize you're not alone and what options might interest you going forward.

Best of luck!
Title: Re: new, old and ready to bald...
Post by: schro on November 11, 2013, 05:20:11 PM
I am amazed by personal reaction of Slymyke to post.  I think attitude of wasting post was most unkind.
I say, as others do, that you need feel no pressure to shave hair if you don't want.  It is your opinion that count most.

Hey PK,
Based on your posts, you sound as if you are a man of the world with vast experience and knowledge.
No one said anyone HAS TO shave their head. Speaking of which, since you are on SBG espousing great wisdom, why don't you tell us about yourself? Better yet, how about a picture?
Title: Re: new, old and ready to bald...
Post by: slymyke on November 11, 2013, 08:23:00 PM
Ive posted on this forum now to build myself up to the shave off but I have an 'abnormal' shaped head which is really holding me back to the point of borderline depression
This is the first time ive opened myself to the idea of shaving my head so im looking for some help maybe just a friendly chat
Please help ;)


I apologize if I'm getting this wrong, but this part of the original message tells me that Leroybrown is not happy about losing his hair (nor was I) but he has come to SBG looking for supportive comments on "building up to the shave off".  The main concern is the fear of having an abnormal shaped head.  This is the only thing holding him back.. .to the point of borderlind depression.  He knows he can keep his hair as is... that is not making him happy. 

Have we all not struggled with the thought of what our head would look like completely shaven?  Even guys who are BBC and know they can grow a full head of hair back pretty quickly, must still wonder if they are going to look odd.    Leroybrown, you mentioned Gabriel Obertan.  I have to say that I don't think his head looks too long.  He looks better with the shaved head than he does with the last stage of balding that is evident in some of his pictures.  I don't think my head is perfectly shaped (some angles are better than other for the camera) but that is the same with hair too. 

Leroybrown, I hope you don't feel pressure from me/us to shave... only support if you want to do so.

Title: Re: new, old and ready to bald...
Post by: Mike E. P. on November 11, 2013, 08:59:04 PM
I didn't know who Gabriel Obertan is so I googled him. He looks perfectly fine sly - to me! Seems to me Leroy just wants to hear various opinions.  So Leroy, take your time or not making your decision. We're here to listen and offer our two cents if you want it.
Title: Re: Re: new, old and ready to bald...
Post by: PKingsley on November 12, 2013, 04:08:59 PM
English is not my first language.  That is true.  I have only my opinion to give and I read that he thought he might look not good with shaved head.  I encourage only to be his choice.  I think maybe you take what I say too personally.  Maybe your comments not really about Leroy anymore?  I do not know.  I think maybe you are trying to make fun of me instead, which is not very hospitable to a new person.
Title: Re: new, old and ready to bald...
Post by: Mikekoz13 on November 12, 2013, 07:22:37 PM
I don't know PKingsley.... I just re-read your first couple of posts and your English was outstanding. It has since deteriorated. Hmmm....
Title: Re: new, old and ready to bald...
Post by: balddaniel on November 13, 2013, 12:01:51 PM
Hello Leroy, (My Dad's name also)

I am BBC and I love it.  The upkeep is minimal and I don't have to worry what my hair would look like after taking a nap.  I shave in the shower and it is part of my morning routine, it only takes a few minutes.  I am aslo here to support your decision to go bald.  As other wise men have said before me "if you have the itch then scratch it!"  Good Luck,

BaldDaniel
Title: Re: new, old and ready to bald...
Post by: nuts on November 13, 2013, 02:28:39 PM
Everyone has an 'abnormal' shaped head but on shaving they find it was all in their imagination.  No one else notices or comments.  Go for it.