Sly Bald Guys Forum
Various Non-Bald Discussions => General Discussion => Topic started by: Mikekoz13 on January 20, 2013, 08:08:37 AM
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This has been a tough week in oour Home. We lost two very dear Family Friends this week.
Our Friend Mr. Jeremiah passed last weekend at the age of 94. He was an a amazing man. Well educated, bright, funny, and a wit as sharp as a straight edge razor. Mr. Jeremiah was a life long New Yorker but moved to our small Pennsylvania town about 7 years ago.
He was NOT happy to leave New York and didn't care for our small country town life style at first. Then his daughter took him to the Senior Center in town that my wife runs. He was embraced immediately by the Seniors and thru them met more and more friends.
He was so interesting. He actually took college courses at the age of 82. Many years ago, even before the civil rights movement he stood up vigorously for minorities. He actually pitched in Yankee Stadium at a tryout for the Yankees many years ago.
Mr. Jeremiah became a part of our Family. My Mom became one of his daytime caregivers (really just a companion to do things with) and he and my Dad struck up an awesome friendship. My kids LOVED him and considered him a third grandfather. I loved verbal sparring sessions with him where we woiuld take turns making ridiclous plays on words.
He was to many of our Family functions over the last 6 years and he and his Family became life long Friends. His daughter Trudy and her husband Hushang were at the hospital with me and my Mom nearly every day while my Dad was in his last weeks.
Though we will miss him dearly, we know that at 94, he had an amazing run. We were all enriched by his wit and kindness.
This one story I heard about him that sums him up clearly. He was driving his son and his son's friend to school one day. This is the conversation in the car that AM:
Mr. Jeremiah: "It's a great day for the race!"
Sons Friend: "What race Mr. Conway?"
Mr. Jeremiah: "The human race!"
Keep them laughing up there Mr. Jeremiah.
We also lost our dear Friend Ron Unger. Ron was only 62 and one of the kindest and definetly one the funniest men I've ever known. Ron was a small, frail looking man so you never expected the dirty jokes that flew from his lips. There were many times that we were out with our group of Friends that Ron would have us laughing so hard jaws would hurt the next morning.
Ron fought cancer for the last two years. He fought it like a champion.... with dignity, determination, and an obvious love for his wife and grown sons.
Ron was the President of our local Lions Club and an every week volunteer at our Fire Hall bingo nights. He was a pillar in oour community and will be missed by many.
Ron was an undertaker for many years which I'm sure helped lead to his amazing sense of humor.
Ron, whose last name was Unger,had this vanity license plate on his car: UNGER TKR
Ron my Friend..... I hope you don't have them blushing too badly up there.
So my real point of this thread? In my 52 years I had never been a "funeral goer". It was just one of those things I didn't really get or see the need for. Then my Dad passed in November. The out pouring of Love, Kindness, and Friendship we received from Friends, Family, and even members of our community was so helpful to our Family. Hearing stories about my Dad from others... things I didn't know about.... were a true gift to our Family.
To see so many loving and familiar faces in those last days of his life and then at his viewing and funeral was truly a comfort to all of us.
So as we helped to lay our two Friends to rest this week I could not help but think back two short months ago when my Family and I were in the shoes of our Friends Families. I was so sad for them but I knew that just by being there we were helping in some very small way. I knew that this was our final gift to our dear Friends that have left but that will never be forgotten.
Peace gentlemen...
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Great post, Kuz. ;)
As I've heard the saying in recent months "death is more painful for those that survive", we've seen our fair share of friends pass like you have (The Lovely Mrs. Schro's college roommate probably only has a few months to live as she battles brain cancer...only 49).
Both Jeremiah and Ron seem like the kind of guys that I would have enjoyed getting to know.
RIP Gentlemen.
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Mike,
Sorry to hear of your losses. We're both at the age where going to funerals is becoming a more common event. Perhaps it's meant to help us realize that we all have impacts on other people's lives in ways that we can't really know or imagine. Few of us will win the Nobel Prize or an Oscar or MVP award, but in thousands of small ways, we affect others. Sounds like that was the case with your friends and from your posts, I think you are cut from the same cloth.
All the best.
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Mike, sorry for the loss of your close friends....You and their families have my sincere prayers....I learned a lot about friendship when I lost my dad almost seven years ago (May 2006) I had more support than I could have ever imagined during that time. That's why when you, Schro, and Paul lost your dads last year, I kind of felt you guys'pain in my own special way; I felt I could kind of relate to you in the loss of a parent. That's why we have to make the most of our time with our loved ones, we just don't know when that time for the final goodbye may come. Thanks again for sharing and my sincere condolences to all affected.
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What comes across to me from your post is that you truely recognise and enjoyed the good times, loosing those close to us can only ever be a terrible experience but it's remembering the good times and the knowledge that you'll never forget them is what helps to ease the pain.
Tomorrow is unfortunatly a date etched into my brain forever as my best friend took his own life on January 21st 2004 at the age of 20, still raw 9 years on but the good times will allways be that, good times and the knowledge that even just knowing the guy had an influence on who I am today (no not the baldy 20 stone bloke part!! ;D), it feels good to know that a part of him still lives on in me and all the others he called a friend.
Sorry for your losses.
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Mike, I'm sorry for the loss of your friends. Keep strong.
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Mike,
I'm sorry to hear about the passing of two great men. I'm sure you were impacted by them greatly, and I bet they were by you as well. It is times like these that make us realize how precious life is, and how little time we have here on Earth. I hope I can impact some people in this way before it is my time to go. Thanks for sharing, and my condolences to you and yours.
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Sorry to hear about your loss Mike.
It sounds like you will have many memories to think back on though.
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Condolences for your losses Mike mate.
Seems you have plenty of great memories of both of your close friends.
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Sorry to hear about your loss Mike.
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Thank you guys... I loved these two men and will miss them greatly but I smile every single time i think of them.
Their passing, following so closely after the death of my Dad (another great guy) has been difficult. The feelings, that were just healing from the loss of my Dad, were sort of reopened over the weekend.
We did have our laughs the last two days though.
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Thanks for sharing Mike. All three of them sound like they were great men. Though they are gone I'm sure that they will live on through all of the people they touched.
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Mike, these are difficult times, but the Lord heals and comforts. Thanks for investing in people as you have shared. It makes these times more difficult, but worth it.
May His comfort heal your sorrows.
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Great post, Koz!
Most importantly, it sounded like both men and those around them got to celebrate their lives while they were still living.
While some will get to live a long life like Mr. Jeremiah, others will have their lives shortened by disease and other circumstances. It's important to remember that each day really is a gift...that's why they call it the present.
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Sorry to hear about your losses bro. Both of these fellas sound like some great guys that really left an impression, of the positive sort, on you.
Funerals are tough. You have my sympathies there. I haven't been to one since I lost my dad five years back, and likely won't go to another one. It was a terrible experience that still causes me night terrors on a regular basis.
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I am sorry for your losses. The death of those close to us can indeed be difficult -- it's a part of our lives that we just have to accept.
For those that are religious they have that consolation of the after-life which is better than this one.
And for the athiests -- well, I like to think that we were all dead before we were born and that was ok wasn't it? So we just sort of go back to the way things were before we were alive -- I reckon that it must be easier to die than to be born. Dying is really not so bad.
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Mike, I am truly sorry for your loss! Here is a {{{{HUG}}}} for you! My Mom passed away 6 months ago tomorrow, and it is one of the hardest things to get past! I have found that you never get over death (No matter who it is!), but you learn to go on and enjoy life once again! Give yourself time to grieve! Treasure those that you hold dear to your heart! Make sure you let them know how important they are to you. I am praying for you. Hang in there.
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Mike, I am truly sorry for your loss! Here is a {{{{HUG}}}} for you! My Mom passed away 6 months ago tomorrow, and it is one of the hardest things to get past! I have found that you never get over death (No matter who it is!), but you learn to go on and enjoy life once again! Give yourself time to grieve! Treasure those that you hold dear to your heart! Make sure you let them know how important they are to you. I am praying for you. Hang in there.
Thank you Mrs. P.
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Thanks Mike,
Great Story and very touching !
We are all born and there is time to go home hopefully after our mission is complete on this earth. Some have such a short time, children that have not had time to even find out what life is all about ! They die through abuse, neglect, murder, cancer, ! I in past jobs have wondered WHY ? Became very bitter , not good, only person it hurts is you ! Never have found out the answer of the questions. The loss of loved ones one way or another is always bitter and not sweet. I have buried so many over the years. And Mike it is never easy. Until you become numb , and just know that they are in a better place ;) they have done their time on this earth. And someday we are going to see them. ;) Well most of them . Unh said !
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Sorry for your loss Mike, it's always a sad time, but it does help you reflect on how good the times were. I always like to think that all my loved ones that have passed are upstairs playing a big game of poker and cheating terribly. If they had a good time in this world, I have no doubt in my mind that they will have a good time in the next.
People too often undervalue simple interactions, but it seems like something as simple as playing word games has stuck with you, and these are the tickets memories. God bless, Mike
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Thanks Mike for posting. Wonderfully poignant.
People such as your friends come into our lives for no apparent reason, and yet they have a profound impact on us which will simmer for years or decades to come. This week I've been thinking about people who arrived in my life at various times which were crucial in my direction.
When I think of them I feel a special connection again, and the world seems that much better.
Appreciate and enjoy the memories of your dear friends. Don't let them fade.
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Thank you Mrs. P.
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You are very welcome, and my name is Debbie. :-)
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Hey Mike,
My deepest sympathy to You on the loss of your Dad. and also on the loss of your 2 close friends. We were lucky tohave them around as log as we did.
I lost my dead in 1968 at age 64 and my Mom in 1995 at the age of 87 in October, 1995. My Dad was a Doctor. He did such a great job of taking care of others he did not do such a god jb of taking care of himself. I still miss both of them a lot. I am sure that you will find comfort in the good memories that you had of all of them when they were well. This has helped me out a lot.
Peace my friend. Thanks for sharing.
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Voodoo,
My sympathies to you also on the loos of your Dad. As I told Koz, you will have your memories of the good times to help you through this.
Take care.
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The losses of loved ones, friends, people that we have served with over life. There are always some wonderful times , that none of us will ever forget. Now days they have many people you can go to, to express how you feel and what you want to say. Back in the day when I was growing up ! School was let out early and friends got together if we had parents that we could talk to we talked about it , other wise we sucked it up , and moved on and wondered why. Guess we still do ! ;) But like Charlie Rich had a song called "For the good Times!" O0
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Mike, Just seeing this now. My sympathies to you and your family. The impact each passing life has unfolds even more after the loss for sure. Very close neighbors just lost a young adult child. At age 53 I too feel the passage of time and sometimes it creeps up quickly. May you have those moments when the presence of your loved ones comforts you at just the right time. Thanks for being open to share with all of us.
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Mike,sorry for your loss of family and friends..............one thing that has helped me to go on after losing parents, and a sibling unexpectedly is that they are always alive in the people they touched in life. That may sound corny but for me it makes a lot of sense.
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Sorry for your loss. It is good though that you got to know such good people. You would be surprised how many people don't know what it means to have a true friend. I lost my best friend at 21 and was lucky to have the time I did have with him. I do not subscribe to any religion, but I do believe that we live in the hearts and minds of our loved ones, and until they are gone from the world, neither are we.
I find that comforting.
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Thank you again guys.
A group of us close Friends were with Ron's wife last weekend. We were all telling stories about Ron and laughing like crazy.
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Bad news, guys.....one of my former subordinate soldiers was found dead in his apartment this morning at 29 (presumed suicide) I just got out of the military in July, and I saw this guy before Christmas, and everything seemed okay....but I didn't ask him and I am now beating myself up for not asking him....this is the second suicide in eight months in my unit....I think we need to look out for each other as a whole through actions and not just words.....That's why it's important to me if a forum member is trying to reach out (or anyone for that matter) we need to pay closer attention (Sorry Mike if I hijacked your thread but I thought it correlated to losing a close friend :'( :'()
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That's no hijack Harry.
I'm sorry for the tragic loss of another of your Friends.
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Sorry to hear that Harry. Stay strong partner.
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Thoughts are with you
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Sorry Harry !
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Sorry to hear that Harry, please don't blame yourself, I'm sure you were a great friend. One of my students, who I had helped a lot with depression, committed suicide in November and I find it almost impossible not to blame myself for not doing more, my heart aches every time I even think about it, but in the end there is no true blame, we are all just heartbroken that they are gone. My next door neighbour recently passed at the age of 85, she had been very kind to us and we shared 8 months as true neighbours, baking for each other, and we would help her out around home. She was a unique, and caring woman who's friendship really touched me in the short time I knew her, she was still driving a huge (she was barely 5") '65 Chevy impala till the day she died, God bless you Valerie
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Sorry, Matt about the loss of your student and your neighbor....and thanks guys. The unit is drilling this weekend and will be having a memorial service. I will try to go tomorrow for a little while.
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Matt
I'm sorry for your recent losses. Opposite ends of the age spectrum... and I'm sure both special in their own ways.
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Harry and Matt...my condolences on your losses.
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Thanks for the kind words guys, it means a lot. They were both such vibrant people, I just wish that my student had been able to experience as much as my neighbour did.
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Harry and Matt,
my deepest sympathy on your losses. We have the memories of the good times to help us.
Harry, Don't blame yourself for this. I am sure that you did a lot and it was good thaqt you saw him around Christmas. These poor guys must have really been hurting alot to do this.
It is great that you are going up there to offer your support. I hope it goes okay for you.
Take care.
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Thanks, Mr. Joe. The unit is drilling this weekend, but my cousin's wedding is today, so I will be tied up with that. I will go visit the unit on Sunday, and the funeral services are Monday, so I will go to that. Appreciate the warm wishes, everyone!
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All the sorry's and kindness in this world doesn't help plain and simple ! We are Born and we live the life, we are given choices to make some are good and some are bad . But we should live for each and every day and be thankful for knowing, loving , and learning from those in our journey ! Yes, there is a miss and it is hard but we all must put on our big boy pants, or big girls pants on !!!!!!!!!!!!!!! And move on and teach those around us who have passed before us ! It may sound somewhat cold but it is the truth.
Also don't go blaming yourself for the crap that has happened. Number 1 you aren't the first and you sure as hell ain't gonna be the last ! Cowboy Up ! Tis along ride or a short one ;) ! But there is always a God's Plan ! O:O
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Easy Switchy.This is my thread and it's about losses, memories and compassion. None of which you mentioned. Easy big fella.