Sly Bald Guys Forum

New Member Section => Introductions => Topic started by: Delancey on April 02, 2012, 06:27:55 PM

Title: Ex girlfriend told me she doesn't feel attracted to me
Post by: Delancey on April 02, 2012, 06:27:55 PM
Hey all! As many fellow posters, I decided to join because I am going bald. I'm in my mid 20s, and my ex girlfriend told me last night that she isnt physically attracted to me anymore, for I am going bald. I feel insecure as it it, with few girls rarely ever paying any attention to me. I am in my sexual prime and just feel so pathetic that I can't attract a cute girl. And now the one girl who I was together with for 4 years essentially called me ugly. I don't even know why I let my self worth be determined by my lack of good looks. ? I just feel really low today, and if she is of that opinion, many other girls feel the same way.

I don't really blame women for not being into me just because I am going bald. After all, I am trying to attract pretty girls, and value someone who takes care of her physical appearance. So it's fair game, I suppose. Nonetheless it really sucks.

I guess I am just feeling down tonight. She essentially disqualified me cause I don't have a lot of her hair, saying that she feels shallow, but sexual attraction is very important to her.

I am really considering shaving my head but I am afraid ill look like Shrek or at best have very few girls who are attracted to me. Kind of sad that I only care about losing my hair because it disqualifies me as a partner for women. But I am being straight up, it really bothers me, and how I look does matter for I want to be attractive to women (at least a few) and feel desirable.



Title: Re: Ex girlfriend told me she doesn't feel attracted to me
Post by: Razor X on April 02, 2012, 06:59:47 PM
Was she an "ex" girlfriend prior to this conversation? If so, then her opinion is totally irrelevant. Either way you are better off without her.

Being bald in no way disqualifies you from being a partner for women -- just the superficial ones. A good-looking guy with hair will still be good-looking if he goes bald, provided that he doesn't do something silly like grow a combover. And an ugly bald guy was once an ugly guy with hair. Hair is not the deal breaker you seem to think it is.
Title: Re: Ex girlfriend told me she doesn't feel attracted to me
Post by: Delancey on April 02, 2012, 07:22:23 PM
She was an ex gf before we had the conversation. Then she called me up last night and told me straight up, "I am not attracted to bald guys."
I think a lot of men look better with hair, but a lot also look great with a shaved head. I am so pale and have a raised mole on my head. I guess I am just looking to feel comfortable with how I look, and one part of that has to do with feeling sexually attractive to women, rather than being lambasted for going bald.
She bought me 3 months of rogaine, but I have tried it before, and it doesn't work for me.

Title: Re: Ex girlfriend told me she doesn't feel attracted to me
Post by: Mikekoz13 on April 02, 2012, 07:28:38 PM
Dude ... you're problem isn't your hair or lack of it... your problem is twofold..... 1) your lack of self esteem, 2) the people you hang with
Problem 1 can be fixed with a mirror..... find one, look into it, and tell yourself taht you're done letting the world walk on you..... that it's YOUR time.
Problem 2 can be fixed by telling all those dumb asses to take a hike and then you can start hanging with better people that appreciate you for who YOU are and what you bring to the table.
Title: Re: Ex girlfriend told me she doesn't feel attracted to me
Post by: Razor X on April 02, 2012, 07:41:28 PM
She was an ex gf before we had the conversation. Then she called me up last night and told me straight up, "I am not attracted to bald guys."


And you care what an ex thinks because ... ??   ???
Title: Re: Ex girlfriend told me she doesn't feel attracted to me
Post by: Delancey on April 02, 2012, 07:43:09 PM
Thanks buddy. I suppose I only feel a bit insecure as a result of going bald. Does it look very obvious in the photos?
Title: Re: Ex girlfriend told me she doesn't feel attracted to me
Post by: Razor X on April 02, 2012, 07:52:18 PM
Thanks buddy. I suppose I only feel a bit insecure as a result of going bald. Does it look very obvious in the photos?

Yes, it's obvious. It's time to do something about it. Sorry if this isn't what you want to hear but I have to be honest.
Title: Re: Ex girlfriend told me she doesn't feel attracted to me
Post by: Delancey on April 02, 2012, 08:01:40 PM
No I appreciate your honesty. Do I have a face for it? I guess that's my only hesitation at the moment: will I be able to pull it off? I am pretty tall and thin, should I start lifting weights (to get a thicker neck)? Also, I am soooo pale. Any recommendations besides tanning?
Title: Re: Ex girlfriend told me she doesn't feel attracted to me
Post by: TheSlyBear on April 02, 2012, 08:07:02 PM
Do I have a face for it?
There's only one way to find out. Do it.

In the very unlikely event that you don't think it's a vast improvement, it grows back! No downside to giving it a try.

Quote
Also, I am soooo pale. Any recommendations besides tanning?
Yeah. Stop obsessing about silly crap. My heritage is French Canadian -- I give  whole new meaning to the word "white". So what?
Title: Re: Ex girlfriend told me she doesn't feel attracted to me
Post by: Razor X on April 02, 2012, 08:14:49 PM
Also, I am soooo pale. Any recommendations besides tanning?

Pale? Have you taken a good look at my photo?  ;)
Title: Re: Ex girlfriend told me she doesn't feel attracted to me
Post by: Delancey on April 02, 2012, 08:22:52 PM
Haha ok I'll give it a try soon. In the meantime, I'll do p90x, and prepare mentally for the change. I'll post pictures whence a few months.


Thanks guys:-)
Title: Re: Ex girlfriend told me she doesn't feel attracted to me
Post by: schro on April 02, 2012, 10:15:43 PM
F*ck Her. She's not worth it.
Title: Re: Ex girlfriend told me she doesn't feel attracted to me
Post by: chgobuzzbald on April 03, 2012, 12:06:17 AM
You would look great shaved. At least go for a no. 2 buzz right away. You will attract girls that ONLY like bald guys. Didnt you ever consider that ?  If you are hanging with 20 year olds thats the problem. Try late 20's, professional types. Totally different regarding how much they like shaved heads. ;)
Title: Re: Ex girlfriend told me she doesn't feel attracted to me
Post by: Paul the Headblader on April 03, 2012, 04:17:54 AM
hey and welcome. I did not read your whole post, but based on the post title I'd say: let her go, feel free, shave your head and girls will come, oh, trust me, they will.
Title: Re: Ex girlfriend told me she doesn't feel attracted to me
Post by: mrzed on April 03, 2012, 05:27:18 AM
Several comments, Delancey.

1. When I was courting my wife, she repeatedly reminded me that "I'm not interested in men with beards". I had a beard then. I still have a beard today. She has never seen me without a beard!  We've been married almost 30 years now.

2. This goes both ways. The kind of woman that you want is one with beautiful inner qualities. A beautiful spirit about her. The kind of man that a good woman wants is a man with good inner qualities.  Look around, you'll find plenty of couples who are downright 'ugly', but have a beautiful relationship.  Looks are external. The hair thing is external.  If someone is hung up on looks, they are not worth it. 

3. As for your picture, It takes a special guy to shave his head bald before nature pulls your hair out for you.  You'd be a good candidate to assist nature with a razor.  Again, look around you. The bald guys have confidence.  Shave your head. And work on some good inner qualities. 
Title: Re: Ex girlfriend told me she doesn't feel attracted to me
Post by: BaldHDbiker on April 03, 2012, 06:49:07 AM
Shave your head and don't associate with your ex. You will feel much better about yourself and will find girls that are attracted to you as a person.
Title: Re: Ex girlfriend told me she doesn't feel attracted to me
Post by: stasiu on April 03, 2012, 08:19:13 AM
Here's some video help :

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RX9zOOvqQoI

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KvO6BnvLIa4
Title: Re: Ex girlfriend told me she doesn't feel attracted to me
Post by: buddha on April 03, 2012, 10:11:55 AM
She was an ex gf before we had the conversation. Then she called me up last night and told me straight up, "I am not attracted to bald guys."
http://m1253.photobucket.com/albumview/albums/delancey3/Mobile%20Uploads/1333414385.jpg.html?o=0

So she's been the "ex" for a while, yet she's still calling you up? And she's calling you to inform you that she's not attracted to bald guys? This sounds like a girl with some issues. Best thing to do is utilize a wonderful invention named Caller ID. When you see her number come up on an incoming call just set the phone down and move away from it. Maybe she'll get the message and stop calling.....which is what EXs are supposed to do. Or if you do answer the phone you might just ask her straight out why she insists on polluting your air with the shrillness of her toxic words and then hang up.
As for the rest of it I have to go along with the guys who have indicated that the real problem you have is an internal one. Maybe it's because of my years or maybe my experience (or maybe both) but I have developed the attitude that if someone is not paying my expenses or "physically sevicing me" (or both) I don't give a fart in a hurricane for their opinion. And I've told a number of people what I think of their opinions over the years. Not exactly the way to win friends and influence people, I admit, but it does seperate the wheat from the chaff.
Title: Re: Ex girlfriend told me she doesn't feel attracted to me
Post by: 4fit on April 03, 2012, 12:23:51 PM
Buddha  O0
Title: Re: Ex girlfriend told me she doesn't feel attracted to me
Post by: Slyfive on April 03, 2012, 02:01:45 PM
Shave it and make being bald yet another attractive trait. My lady goes wild for the bald now, but she always said she wouldn't like it before... Like the guys said in your other thread, real friends, and genuinely interested women won't bat an eyelid, because it's YOU they're interested in, not your hair. Also, anyone who is that intent on kicking you while you're down about hairloss is obviously so insecure that they need to hide their insecurities in hateful words.
Title: Re: Ex girlfriend told me she doesn't feel attracted to me
Post by: Razor X on April 03, 2012, 02:05:41 PM
Shave your head and don't associate with your ex.

I agree. Time to move on.   #**p
Title: Re: Ex girlfriend told me she doesn't feel attracted to me
Post by: quietstorm on April 04, 2012, 08:01:46 AM
If you spend your time worrying about what people think then your life is a sham.... You will miss out on being YOU, consumed on pleasing people who may really not care one way or the other what you do......  The ex doesn't like bald heads, why are you trying to please an ex? She will be doing her thing and you will be worrying about what she thinks... You have to start doing what's right for you and the confidence will kick in.... Saw the pic and you would look better sly and doing this for YOU is a step in the right direction
Title: Re: Ex girlfriend told me she doesn't feel attracted to me
Post by: Cropduster84 on April 04, 2012, 09:01:38 AM
Looking at your pics, you could easily pull off the sly look.

It would make you look a lot younger too. I always think throwing a little facial hair in the mix looks good too. I've not been without my soul patch since I was a teenager.

I had a girlfriend who hated me shaving my head, but that was years ago and now I'm with someone who loves me for who I am.

You'll get there dude!
Title: Re: Ex girlfriend told me she doesn't feel attracted to me
Post by: Baldstu on April 04, 2012, 02:56:32 PM
Herehere zed and confidence what little I know of women they are fickle and the opposite can mean an attraction . Its the inner person that matters
Title: Re: Ex girlfriend told me she doesn't feel attracted to me
Post by: Cris on April 05, 2012, 06:25:45 AM
Hey all! As many fellow posters, I decided to join because I am going bald. I'm in my mid 20s, and my ex girlfriend told me last night that she isnt physically attracted to me anymore, for I am going bald
Well I'm no longer interested in or attracted to my ex girlfriends.
I see it as a normal thing, by my side.
Title: Re: Ex girlfriend told me she doesn't feel attracted to me
Post by: b.driscoll on April 05, 2012, 06:49:38 AM
  Sounds to me that her issues have more to do with herself..............and less to do with your hair. Most of us here have been through the ''wars,'' and all you can do is try to stay positive,  don't smother,   and be yourself.  Good luck!
Title: Re: Ex girlfriend told me she doesn't feel attracted to me
Post by: Baldstu on April 05, 2012, 10:03:46 AM
Trust what  the other guys  say  , there is more to this than shaving your head wy she  is not attracted to you  it may be the universe protecting you from a disastrous relationship
Title: Re: Ex girlfriend told me she doesn't feel attracted to me
Post by: xnewyawka on April 05, 2012, 07:21:51 PM
Sounds like she's an ex for a reason, keep it that way. Shave your dome, get it out there and stand proud. You'll soon see how the new found confidence will have an effect, on you and those around you as well.
Title: Re: Ex girlfriend told me she doesn't feel attracted to me
Post by: Sir Harry on April 05, 2012, 08:46:18 PM
As a recent divorcee, I can understand how "exes" get to you...sometimes to see if they still can hit that "nerve". The key is to ignore her, because if you entertain your ex and her thoughts about your hair or otherwise, she wins....Go ahead and shave your head and free yourself from your hair....AND her! Good luck to you in the future!
Title: Re: Ex girlfriend told me she doesn't feel attracted to me
Post by: Arnie on April 23, 2012, 08:29:30 AM
Ditto on everything said above. Welcome to SBGs!!! 8)