Sly Bald Guys Forum
Various Non-Bald Discussions => Military/Serviceman => Topic started by: BaldRob on May 05, 2007, 11:07:09 AM
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A Sailor and a Marine are out drinking one night, when the Marine finally
says, "You know, I don't know what else to do. Whenever I go home after we've
been out drinking, I turn the headlights off before I get to the driveway. I
shut off the engine and coast into the garage. Take my shoes off before I go
into the house, I sneak up the stairs, get undressed in the bathroom, stick my
foot in the toilet and pee down my leg to prevent splashing sounds. I ease into
bed and my wife STILL Wakes Up, and Yells at me for staying out so late!
"The Sailor looks at him and says "Well, you're obviously taking the wrong
approach. I screech into the driveway, slam the door, storm up the steps, pee
hard into the toilet water, then use the full flush, throw my shoes in the
closet, undress in the bedroom, then jump into bed, slap her on the ass and
say: WHO'S HORNY? and she acts like she's sound asleep. Works Every
Time!"
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Ah Rob ... You well know women. LMAO
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That WOULD work for a sailor , but women are ALWAYS horny for a Marine. ;D
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That WOULD work for a sailor , but women are ALWAYS horny for a Marine. ;D
Sounds like a poll is coming our way in the near future...
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That WOULD work for a sailor , but women are ALWAYS horny for a Marine. ;D
Thought you were gonna say women are always horny for a sly guy.
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Lets end this and just say women are always horny!!
At least in my happy place they are ;)
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Lets end this and just say women are always horny!!
At least in my happy place they are ;)
;D Oh ya! Agreed! ;D
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That WOULD work for a sailor , but women are ALWAYS horny for a Marine. ;D
You may be right... until the women find out that jarheads always follow the USMC Manual for Sex:
1. Insert
2. Remove
Repeat steps 1 and 2 until finished (which knowing the way jarheads are, about 30 seconds later!) :px :px
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Lets end this and just say women are always horny!!
They are until they take their first bite of wedding cake. :Xo!
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They are until they take their first bite of wedding cake. :Xo!
exactly the reason i keep them on the LAY-way plan.... ;D
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Lets end this and just say women are always horny!!
They are until they take their first bite of wedding cake. :Xo!
that is a no sh!tter!
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Lets end this and just say women are always horny!!
They are until they take their first bite of wedding cake. :Xo!
that is a no sh!tter!
Thanks for the warning, guys. Now I know to insist that there be no cake at my wedding! ;D
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razor. doctors have found that wedding cake has two side effects.
1. they either gain 50 lbs and quit having sex. or
2. sexual appetite decreases by 95%
trust me brother it is true. pm me and i'll tell you why women smile so much at the wedding.
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trust me brother it is true. pm me and i'll tell you why women smile so much at the wedding.
Yup, the new bride is thinking "No More BJ's".
And that doesn't stand for Burgers & Jalapenos either. :(
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Lets end this and just say women are always horny!!
They are until they take their first bite of wedding cake. :Xo!
You forgot to mention that they all the sudden get the urge to go at it like rabbits when they decide it's time to have a baby.
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Lets end this and just say women are always horny!!
They are until they take their first bite of wedding cake. :Xo!
You forgot to mention that they all the sudden get the urge to go at it like rabbits when they decide it's time to have a baby.
I know how that goes.
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Seemed like the perfect place to post this:
The wife came home early - found her husband in their bedroom making
love to a very attractive young woman. She was very upset - "You are a disrespectful pig!" she cried. "How dare you do this to me -a faithful wife, the mother of your children! I'm leaving you - I want a divorce straight away !"
The husband replied, "Hang on just a minute love, so at least I can
tell you what happened." "Fine, go ahead," she sobbed, " but they'll be the last words you'll say to me!"
The husband began -- "Well, I was getting into the car to drive home and
this young lady here asked me for a lift. She looked so down and out- so defenseless that I took pity on her and let her into the car. I noticed that she was very thin, not well dressed and very dirty. She told me that she hadn't eaten for three days! So, in my compassion, I brought her home and warmed up the enchiladas I made for you last night- the ones you wouldn't eat because you're afraid you'll put on weight. The poor thing devoured them in moments.
Since she needed a good clean up I suggested a shower, and while she was
doing that I noticed her clothes were dirty and full of holes so I threw them away. Then, as she needed clothes, I gave her the designer jeans that you have had for a few years, but won't use because you say they are too tight. I also gave her the underwear that was your anniversary ! present, which you won't use because I don't have good taste. I found the sexy blouse my sister gave you for Christmas that you won't use just to annoy her, and I also donated those boots you bought at the expensive boutique and won't use because someone at work has a pair the same."
The husband took a quick breath and continued - "She was so grateful for
my understanding and help and as I walked her to the door she turned to me with tears in her eyes and said,
" Please ... do you have anything else that your wife doesn't use?"
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that sounds way too familiar.
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Schro laughs.....Schro cries.
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That was GREAT!!
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ahahaha man i guess ill understand that some day.
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Paul, too funny bro!
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:x! :Xo! :x! :Xo! :x! :Xo!
Why not tell us how you really feel? Get it all out. O0
Circles May 8th, 2009 on calendar. Note to self.. It's all about ME till this date.
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It is all true. When it came time to have a baby, it was like she was alive again. Now the kids are 6 and 5 and we're back to the dead zone! I told her I was tired of soaking my hand in beer to get my date drunk. She didn't think that was funny at all. I told her I didn't think celbacy was funny either. LOL
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Lets end this and just say women are always horny!!
They are until they take their first bite of wedding cake. :Xo!
So true............ for you guys getting married in the future try this:
From the day of your wedding until your first Anniversary, every time you and the new bride have sex put a penny in a jar. From the day after your first Anniversary every time you and the wife have sex remove a penny from the jar........ you will never empty that jar...........
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It is all true. When it came time to have a baby, it was like she was alive again. Now the kids are 6 and 5 and we're back to the dead zone! I told her I was tired of soaking my hand in beer to get my date drunk. She didn't think that was funny at all. I told her I didn't think celbacy was funny either. LOL
Now that is funny!!!!! :*))
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It is all true. When it came time to have a baby, it was like she was alive again. Now the kids are 6 and 5 and we're back to the dead zone! I told her I was tired of soaking my hand in beer to get my date drunk. She didn't think that was funny at all. I told her I didn't think celbacy was funny either. LOL
Now that is funny!!!!! :*))
:'(
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Just another reason I remain single....
I get more than you guys and have variety >:D
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Champ - you are absolutely right. But i wouldn't trade being married for anything. Yeah, we tease and fuss and complain but at the same time we wouldn't know what to do without each other.
I think all the married guys in here have struck the balance between togetherness and "man time". Red meat, beer and trash talkin'.
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Just another reason I remain single....
I get more than you guys and have variety >:D
Amen brother O0 8)